Hi, thank you all for you advice in the past on my previous two threads. I am not sure where I left it all.
The advice from the memory clinic (Out Patients Mental Health) was to put mum or sertraline 25mg. No idea why but they pur her on 50mg and we did not spot it. After 3 days she had a reacton and her potassium and sodium levels crashed. She ended up in the high dependancy unit and was there for 2.5 weeks. She came out last Tuesday and we, thanks to advice, got the Urgent Care Team in place for 2 visits per day. We went through it on Tuesday night with the care person who visited Mum's house. Just as she arrived Mum said she needed to go to hospital. We have been her so many times. I explained she had just come out but she had no recollection. I got her on her feet and gave her a talking to and she was right as rain. No suprise. So we got the package in place but mum is refusing to deal with the care people and says she does not need it.
So it seems to be the way that you think you have hit the bottom but realise that you are nowhere near it. I did not realise that I had picked up Covid, most likely from the hospital on my visits. So I carried on with phoning them on Wednesday and then on Thursday I did a test and found I had covid. I had no choice but to go out and do their shopping. I kept a mask on but if there was another way I would have taken it but they had no food.
Dad seem absolutely fine and I had all the windows open and he was managing fine despite all of his physical issues. I could not tell mum as she would have not been able to cope. In hindsight this was a mistake and I know some on here may critisice me but I am worn down and not thinking straight. Dad called yesterday and he was not feeling well. Unsurprisingly he had called an ambulance. We have one every few days with mum. So we (my Dh and I) went round there last night and did a covid test on dad and he was positive. He was on the floor and drifting in and out. My dh chased up the ambulance (it was called at 9pm). Mum was all over the place. I informed the care team what was happening but they have all of the covid protocols in place.
We managed to get dad onto a chair and both he and mum slept through the night with no sign of the ambulance althoug my Dh had chased it. I have had no sleep and am exhausted. At 4:30am I was cleaning their house. We settled them this morning and once again I spoke to the care team. We got home and got 1 hours sleep and the phone rang. It was the paramedic to apologise as there had been a mix up and they were no looking at dad. They asked if mum had mental capacity as she had been saying dad had had heart attacks etc. but of course he hasnt. So we sorted everything on the phone and there was no further action as we had done everything that was needed. Put the phone down and a few mins later it rang again. I would say that everytime it rings my heart sinks.
As the paramedics were writing up the paperwork in the ambulance, mum had seen her chance and told them she was having a heart attack. Sorry for swearing but For Fucks Sake. The paramedic said they had to take her in to the hospital. I was in pieces so my Dh took over and after 40mins on the phone we agreed they had no choice.
I have LPoA but without the formal dementure diagnosis their local capacity check trumped me. We have had the CT scan and her brain has shrunk but we need that official diagnosis but have had to wait as she has been in hospital. My dh explained that now dad was on his own with covid and could not manage and mum had absolutely nothing wrong with her and would be put outside the hospital on her own after after a check and suddenly we had two vulnerable adults on their own in very poor situation.
I am at a loss here. We (my dh and I) are struggling to cope. We both have covid and are feeling dreadful, we havent slept for a day and a half and now have mum and dad in a bad way. The urgent care team agreed to switch over and look after dad and for that I am so incredibly grateful. I have no idea where mum is or what is happening to her. She wont get into a taxi, she had no mobile phone and the paramedic said he would ask the hospital to provide transport but it was their call.
I would like to think this is rock bottom but my experience suggests otherwise. I have made so shit decisions but everything has been done for the right reasons and it is not as if we are young with both being around 60 and the future is looking less than rosy.
Thanks for listening.