Mum wants to move to a care home but money will run out and not sure she even needs it

Looks like these are her options :

1. Pursue carehome route
2. Pursue private extra help shelter rental AND do private hip replacement

Would she be expecting you to pay once her money runs out OP?

Just saw your update and yes extra sheltered sounds great for her
Places vary in how much they have going on and how pro-active they are at inviting people etc
Is she a sociable lady who would like to make friends? You could offer to take her to the coffee morning to start with or ask the warden to support her to go/ arrange some coffee dates with other residents
You can also still go to a day centre if you are in extra sheltered if those are still running with Covid. Maybe she would consider that too?

Technically speaking no the LA would not automatically pick up funding for a care home when funds run out. They would do an assessment at the time and determine if she had needs that warrant a care home and they will not pay for a place they deem too expensive only one that is at their baseline rate.

However if she has sold her home she'll be homeless and the LA will then have a duty to house her anyway so it will be a lot of trouble for them to find her a sheltered flat and a care package and in practice they would probably just fund the care home unless it was a very very posh expensive one.

A lot will change in 2 years when you are old and frail and it's very possible she will have eligible needs by then especially as you tend to lose skills and fitness in a care place where it's all done for you. I would not worry about what happens when funds run out but more about her not actually being happy there. Make sure she visits the places and sees the reality. It's not much fun being the highest functioning person in a care home where most have dementia.

Also she sounds to me as though she might be depressed. I know it's hard to get her to go to the GP but any chance of getting her assessed?

The private hip operation, if she is willing, would be a good place to start. It is hard to think straight when you are in pain.

…. But I see user has answered that one!

@myamie that scenario does not happen very often in my LA. Yes people have to move to a different cheaper care home but if someone has sold their home and has no home to go to, it’s quite hard to say they have to leave a care home setting!

Also sadly after a couple of years chances are someone will develop a dependence on a care home even if they didn’t have one when they went in!

I work for social services and when someone has self-funded in a care home and the money runs down to the threshold we have to do a self-funding pick up. This means we assess their needs and if eligible to be in the care home we will pick up the funding - at best value though so we may want the person to move.

If they are not eligible as their needs are not high enough, we would not fund and they would have to move elsewhere. This does happen more often than you'd think.

It would be advisable for her to look at extra care places where there is care on site and social things to do rather than a full on care home.

If ahe does decide to move to a carehome and pays herself she will have a financial assessment and be asked to sign a contract. They will need to know that she will pay.

Unfortunately you cannot arrange a social services assessment without her permission and she has already refused one, you cannot tell them she ,lacks capacity unless a health lrofessional has stated that and if she doesnt have capacity you can no longer apply for poa, it would be deputyship.

My friend didn't listen to her mum when she asked to go to a home. She died alone at home & wasn't found for a while. This haunts me, as I should have said more, I think.

I've got mild arthritis & it's miserable. Let her move & have some company & help.

We've got various friends, whose parents have just had enough & gone into care. More common than we would have thought. Always assumed people did it as a last resort.

Once the cash is gone, the local authority picks up the tab. Get some advice on that from Age UK?

In my local authority if you’re 2 years away from threshold you could insist on a care assessment but there’s not much point really.
I wouldn’t involve social services at this point other than to perhaps find out which homes they might fund in future.

What happens if you tell her she can't afford it or needs to wait until Covid blows over and she has had her hip operation.? I take it that a move won't happen if you don't organise it. She may just be saying these things for attention and to vent how unhappy she is . Lock-down with bad arthritis would make most people crotchety. Step back. I would refer her to speak to Social Services about her plans as they will be able to give her details of what accommodation would suit and assist her. This is not something you know enough about. Infuriatingly, it's common for folks who won't accept help at home when family discuss it, to become sweet reasonableness when a third party talks to them. I would also ask the GP about the hip op and if she is ever likely to be fit for it. Point out how low her mental condition has become.

Once her funds call below the threshold of £24K, and she has a care assessment
Social services could say she doesn’t strictly need 24 hour care and would be ok at home with carers.
However if she’s already sold her home, has been in a care home for 2 years and doesn’t have a home to go to then in my experience they are extremely unlikely to say that.
Also with her arthritis etc her care needs may well increase in that time so that they would agree she needs the care.

They may of course say that she has to move to a care home that accepts the local authority rate so ideally she’d move to one the local authority use too so that she’s less likely to have to move when her money runs out.

Is a live in care an alternative option? For self funders it can be a comparable cost and enable someone to stay at home.

Organise a social services assessment, state you are doing all these things for her because she lacks capacity, they have to take mental health into account too. They may say that they will take over the fees once money is below £23k. Care home fees vary dramatically and are much more reasonable if they don't have personal care needs. We were paying £500 a week a year ago (when he died) for bed, board and washing basically, this wasn't that much more than household bills, food, cleaner l, gardener and home help - Midlands

SS can put care in for cleaning, shopping, hospital appointments, meds collection etc. Having family to support is not a requirement for independent living.

Definitely speak to Age UK. They are the experts and will give good advice. I would favour paying for the hip replacement and finding better sheltered/ assisted living. That could make all the difference.

If you were to refuse to do any practical stuff in two years though, she'd likely not manage? So could stay.
If she's asking to go into a care home I'd think long term and seize the opportunity with both hands. New hip or not, people can go downhill very sharply between late 70's and early 80's.

When money runs out the LA would assess her. If they assess that her needs can be met in the community they would support her to move out of the care home and in to sheltered accomodation or private rented or Local authority rented, though she'd need to register and bid for suitable properties.

To be honest, it's quite rare that someone in a care home for 2 years would be assessed as being able to live in the community but it does happen.

I'd recommend extra care sheltered housing as an option. Would give your mum the social aspect she is craving. It's rented, so no need to buy anything.

I suspect your Mum has quite unrealistic expectations around funding. My Mum was terminally ill and it still took weeks for emergency funding for a nursing home to be approved. She actually died before it happened.
Care homes will ask these questions before offering her a place. It sounds like she's unhappy where she is though. Maybe something nearer you would make sense?

She may not get funding for carers, if she refuses to have a care needs assessment that cannot happen anyway. She could apply for attendance allowance and may get a spell in a rehab unit or a few weeks home care and equipment after her operation.

Yes Age UK is a good idea. I would be wary of a private carehome who took on a resident who previously refused all care, refuses meds, has no real care needs or enough money to last, when the cash runs out she may need to move out. Why does she want to move into a carehome at the moment, you say she is anti social so she will just be sitting in her room all day spending money that she doesnt need to spend.