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Elderly parents
Original poster

I want my mum to move in with us in an extension rather than ever going into a home.

53 replies

TootsPye · 09/05/2021 17:38

I'd love for my mum (mid 70's) to move in with me and my husband. We have a large house and garden. Mum would be living in an extension built for her, living space, ground floor, garden area.. separate but still our address. Is this is a good idea? Are there any cons on my mum's side I haven't thought about?

OP posts:
MothershipG · 09/05/2021 17:49

Please excuse the their/there mistake, I really should proofread before I post!

MothershipG · 09/05/2021 17:47

It depends how well you all get on.
How independent your Mum is.
If she wants to move? Is it far?
Will she still be able to see her friends?
Are their other family members who used to visit her?
Will there still be space for them to stay?
Do you have any expectations of help?
Have you discussed it? What does she think?
What security will she have?
Will she own part of the property?
If you get run over by a bus will your DH still want her there?

And about a million more things to think about.

You don't say if you've had these conversations?

Incidentally we did this with my Mum so I'm not anti, just some of the things that came up.

Metallicalover · 09/05/2021 17:46

How would finances work? Do you have other siblings??
Would you be able to provide 24 hour care if she ever needs it?
It's all well and good saying live with me rather than going into a home but there's sometimes no other option for a lot of people who's relatives have very complex needs/advanced dementia etc