The new shiny 2019 thread for anyone caring for elderly parents

Danish you are correct! An eye roll is the best solution sometimes

Yolo my youngest had recurrent ear trouble and I couldn't be bothered to wait for the NHS in the end. I went to a private ear clinic and they sorted it lickety split - about £400 and then back into the NHS for follow ups.

😂 if I don't understand, then an eye roll and thinking crazy British person normally works fine. You would probably think the same of me in Danish 🙄

Danish I can understand everything you write and think you do fabulously well. I was just thinking about you when I wrote "can't be arsed" and "hot footing it" and thought poor Danish.

Hi thigh
Do hope it's not your very polite way to say it is totally incomprehensible 😜
I do try, but have been told that people online don't like when you apologize for language all the time.
Would love to write in Danish, sadly there are no sites as good as this one 😀.
But your written humor is a little hard, if one is about to overstep some mark? Likewise I just hate MN abbreviations 😂.
Please bear with me 😊.

snow has melted thank goodness! Yes, we are going to a beauty spot in mum's neck of the woods.

yes, dad used to say that about taxing the same money however many times. Good thing he didn't know about the increase in probate fees or he'd have been really furious.

I know someone who sold up in London, moved up north and runs a cattery. She says one of the most satisfying things about it is keeping her earnings under the tax threshold.

I've had people ask me if I am topping up my NI contributions while I'm not working. No. I don't actually believe the state pension will exist when I get there. tbh I hope not to live that long anyway!

I don't understand probate or inheritance tax it seems like double bubble for the tax man. How many times can they tax the same money? Not fair.

Grace have you got snow? Bright, sunny and cold here in London but a good day for Ash scattering. Are you doing it at a beauty spot? I want to go in the Thames.

yolo that's good re the house.

I think we will be hit by the new probate fees. I have been looking online and it seems that it just is going ahead for April. I think we are just on a borderline as well.

I don't normally get worked up about tax but this is pretty bad and can't be paid out of the estate. Absolutely a stealth tax.

Bert lol at the tulips. When Dad was in hospital he bit the finger oxygen monitor thing and said "this cake is shit".

Nice bug!

Not really fast moving, but it's not a thread where I want to skim read, so it's easy to fall behind.

Yolo very pleased to hear about the house. No mean feat in this stinker of a market. And well done with your smear. I have to go hold my friend 's hand for a cervical biopsy next week. Fuck I hope she's clear.

Here you are ladies, you have earned it. Perhaps two for extra hard work 😁.

I'm thinking bejewelled cockroach brooches??

Sssshhhhh ... I think the new year has brought new members - which is wonderful, although sad that so many need it - but arthritic oldies like me are struggling to keep up! Do we need a secret cockroach handshake?

Are we fast moving? Maybe we have turned into the Big Boys on AIBU? Shhhh...keep quiet on our niche thread.

Three cheers for all of that apart from the rancid daughterly ear, Yolo! I can’t keep up with this thread either, but I did see the sadly funny side of the nibbled tulips.

Am I right to be fuming? For weeks now, my far from sainted mother has been complaining that she has a cough/chest infection that won’t shift and I’ve been encouraging her to go to the GP. I’ve just discovered that the GP in fact gave her antibiotics but she hadn’t taken them. You really can’t help someone who won’t help themselves, can you?

And with that, cockroach one and all!

gutrot that is bloody brilliant! may she continue well and happy.
mrsbert funny but sad.

In other news: got an offer on mum's house today for full asking price. which is £25k above what estate agent suggested, and still a long way to go, but good news after only 4 viewings. DD1 has the most rancid ear infection ever, pushing for referral to ENT (as has been almost constant since Oct) but now got to wait for bloods. DH has vital MRI booked for this Weds, chemo planning mtg on Fri. Depending on MRI results chemoradio starts Feb 11, please god. Oh and I booked my smear test for next week and just got clear mammogram!! Ladies: do not neglect your mammos and smears please, no matter what else is going on. cockroach all round.

Hello lovely people, I can't keep pace with this thread, but I thought you might enjoy the news that my mother (now diagnosed with both alzheimers and vascular dementia, and some stroke action of uncertain date) started chowing down on a vase of tulips my niece brought at the weekend.

There's appreciation!

@gutrotweins that's really good news. My mum's delirium is also better, though she's still cooking dinner for four despite living alone. I asked her who she was cooking for. It's for the others in the lounge, one of them being my brother when he was a child. How sad is that? She said she thinks it's because her mind is retreating to a time in her life when she was happy. Gave her an extra big squeeze and a kiss when I left.

timber for you.

gutrot what good news! That's a rapid improvement. She can prep her own meals, that's grand.

thigh I'm sure you're still lovely. You can be honest saying that about your dad, you don't have to sugar coat it for others.

Just a happy and encouraging interruption from me!
Dm has been in hospital and a carehome. She was delirious for most of the 12 weeks - paranoid, hallucinating, deluded, etc.
Brought her home last Tuesday with heavy hearts and big dollops of pessimism, with a permanent place in a care home standing by.

However, six days later , she is now down to 2x30min care per day (from 3 x 1h): she's preparing her own meals, sleeping through the night, talking sense, thinking of going out...

I know she's living on a knife edge and so much more frail than she was, but it's good to see her in the real world again especially as we expected the worst.

So those of you with parents with hospital delirium: there is hope when they get discharged!