When I first came on this thread I was caring for my MiL, my mum and step-father. I was retired and all my children had left home. I found it really hard work and very depressing. Especially as I had a poor relationship with all of them and neither my BiL, his wife, my DH or my Brother did anything.
Then I saw people on here coping with the same thing but with full time work, children going through exams, disabled partners, personal ill health and all sorts of other things. It made me realise how unfair and difficult life can be. Almost without exception they spoke about the guilt of neglecting those around them.
You and they are coping with so much more than one person should be expected to. The exhaustion, never feeling you are doing enough, sadness for the relative and quite often a secret wish that the person could let go of a life that has no pleasure for them.
Through life we are problem solvers. We see what needs doing and find practical help to make the problem go away. With looking after the elderly there are so many limits to what we can do that will actually make a difference. The frustration of day after day dealing with unsolvable problems is perhaps the hardest.
I really hope that just by coming on here you will know that you are not alone. There is lots of help and guidance but what we all would like to do is be another pair of hands for you. Because that is what we really need.
It is important to try and take time for yourself once in a while.💐