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Elderly parents
Original poster

Paying for care home fees

53 replies

RainbowCookie · 07/02/2018 15:45

Hi hoping someone knows more on this as the advice is very conflicting.

My Dad has gone downhill rapidly, he’s currently in hospital with little cognition, he’s unable to hold a conversation or be understood. He is doubly incontinent and unable to walk or stand.

Drs have recommended a care home due to high needs. However my parents have a fair amount of savings so would have to self fund. I understand that he will have to use all his savings and half his joint savings to pay for care, however this will only last 18 months or so and his illness is not terminal he could be there for years.

The social worker said when the savings run out, as my parents own a house together they will have to do equity release on 50% of the house value and use that money before the council will fund anything.

My Mum is terrified of equity release, this will essentially trap her in her home as if she ever sells she’ll have to pay off the equity release (I guess the interest will mount up as well so she could end up with very little). She won’t be able to downsize as flats are only a little cheaper than the cost of her 3 bed.

So my Dad is moving home, Mum is getting a hospital bed and a hoist in the lounge. I’m very worried how she’ll cope. She is going to get carers in twice a day, but she’ll be trapped in the house mostly. I live a 12 hour flight away so can’t help on a regular basis.

Has anyone been through this with self funding care, there has to be a solution that doesn’t involve my Mum getting into debt or killing herself being a carer for someone who should be in a nursing home.

Thanks very much

OP posts:
notthe1Parrot · 07/02/2018 20:42

As I understand it, if a spouse lives in the marital home when their partner goes into care, the house cannot be touched.

retirednow · 07/02/2018 20:17

I don't know what a discharfemtea is, it's supposed to say the discharge team, very helpful people.

retirednow · 07/02/2018 20:15

Oh dear I am sorry you are in this situation. Firstly you dad must have a needs assessment done before he goes home, this is available to everyone with no charge. That will determine what equipment and level of care he will need if he does go home. He will also need a capacity assessment and your mum should apply for power of attorney if your dad still has capacity. If he doesnt then the social worker or discharge team will need to ensure all his,care is given in his interests and that he is safe to go home. Your mum can apply for,attendance allowance for dad and carers allowance for herself. The occupational therapist should visit the house to make sure its a safe environment and arrange equipment, you will need more,than a hospital bed and hoist . The carer manager should assess to your mum and dad to make sure they can look after him properly and that they are trained to use the hoist. Even if he is self funding he may be entitled to a few weeks care in an interim bed until the house is ready, ask the discharge team. I'm not sure about the equity release, this is something mum should check with age uk. Looking after someone at,home can be extremely difficult and your mum really needs to speak with the doctors and discharfemtea, she can ask for a full assessment and a best interests meeting.