Hello
I posted a while ago about Mother being confused and getting up in night thinking morning and that I had to call doc for chest infection.
It has been an unbelievably awful few weeks since then and I just need to vent. I am an only child and live alone, no children, she has literally no other family but me , and I feel like I am sinking. I live about an hour away from her and work an hour and a half in the other direction.
The chest infection was pneumonia and she was also treated for a heart condition. Eventually declared fit to discharge after ten days but I refused without appropriate care as she had deteriorated so much mentally. After a huge amount of faffing and poor communication got carers in three times daily but quickly clear this was insufficient. She needs prompting to do every little task. How much genuine, how much psychological no idea. Started looking at residential rehab to get her back on feet, learning to do simple tasks etc, and arranged an assessment.
In meantime, I have been trying to keep my full time job going in between visits. I share an elderly dog with my former d h. He rings me on day five of all this to say he is being taken into hospital himself with joint infection, can I take the dog. So I have the dog and organise my friend to walk him. She returns from walk shaking and crying. Dog has bumbled to the edge of a massive drop and she only just grabbed his collar in time.
Dog starts to deteriorate physically and mentally - missing my ex dh and shock from the incident. Off to vet. More painkillers prescribed. Dog suddenly become frail over night and barely eating. Knocking furniture over at night etc.
Meanwhile the men arrive to dig up a gas main, need access to the house and my yard. Cue two days of drilling and hammering ( have been working at home) I now have an inelegant array of pipework across the back of my house.
Nurses came to do the assessment for the residential rehab after she had been out hospital. four days,but when tried to get out of her chair she literally screamed in pain. Doc called and suspected fracture. Ambulance men had to give her gas and air. Back to hospital.
At this point I was absolutely spent and didn't go with her. X Ray and ct scan - no fracture after all, but still in severe pain, so has been sent for an mri. I have been googling and have my suspicions but I am not a medic, so will see what this week brings.
I have decided I must go back to the office this week, despite the long commute , for my own sanity if nothing else.
Put wheels in motion to register the EPA. Investigating continuing care and attendance allowance. I thought she received it but I dont think she does. Also getting a form to put her name on the care home list ( where my Dad went)
There is a massive pile of unopened post at her place which I just can't bring myself to tackle.
Feel am losing my mind myself. Have been having to drive around with the poor dog in the car as he isn't fit to be left alone. At one point I glanced in the mirror and was convinced he had died - he was so completely motionless.
At wits' end. Any advice or suggestions very welcome. It's all very very shit.