What split is fair

But it depends if needs can be met with 50%

pensions should be included
the 18 yo won’t factor

you both have equal housing needs

without knowing the asset values, earnings, ages etc no one here can advise

you need legal advice but the fs ties you’ve outlived don’t automatically give you more than. 50%,

Not necessarily if your needs can be met at 50% as PP have repeatedly said.

Health could play a factor. Again, you won’t be handed everything and your ex expected to start from
scratch. What’s he most his job? Got ill himself , couldn’t work etc? It woukd be totally wrong

but there may be a case. But you’re not giving any details.

speak to a lawyer

Did you give up work 18 years ago OP or have you been back to work once the children were in school/childcare?

An ex bf of mine kept his pension (ex forces) but gave his ex wife the house, so they split the pool in that way. He was better off in terms of size of pot, and still working, but she had raised the kids and not worked so he wanted to do the right thing by her.

hmm. I suspect he was much better off doing that in terms of value. But if it worked for them…. 🤷🏻‍♀️

OP… mediation will help sort this. A good friend of mine got 60% of all assets because she had given up work to look after their three children as he built his business and a career. His future earning potential was £100k pa +, while she was lucky to get an entry level job earning £30k. I am not sure ill health will come into it specifically, but your earning potential compared to his will be a consideration.

Not really (sorry). If you can’t work due to ill health then the state is there to support you not an ex partner.

It’s mostly based on being able to house yourself and your children. You only have one technical child, although 18yr old may be classed as a child dependent on their situation. Either way, it’s unlikely you’d get a huge amount more than 50/50 as you’ll only need to support yourself in a year or so. Unless you go for spousal support but that only tends to work if your husband earns a huge amount. Otherwise, no chance

Your health status may come into it …. But again your ex won’t be expected to lose everything so you get it all. Life is uncertain as you know, your ex could fall on hard times /ill health too.

so, as you’ve given no information you just need legal advice as no one here can help you

Yes, your health status absolutely could come into it, but if he disputes how it affects you, you'll have to make a case as to how your disability prevents you from working now and the future.

Depression might be harder to negotiate than MS for instance.

You can’t share a forces pension, it isn’t allowed