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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

30s TTC - Our BESH GussetWatch Ever, With Guest Star Joe Mangel!

995 replies

Scorpette · 23/04/2010 10:13

Come on in, you raddled old caaaaahs, whotchoo waitin' for?

I've gone for a groovy 60s psychedelic theme, so get your fat upper arms comfy in the hanging globe chairs and hide your mememe shame in the glow of the lava lamps!

Russell Howard is our new bartender, although I don't think he's happy at the flares 'n' kipper tie outfit I've forced him to wear. And of course, Mitchell is in the pit, nervously awaiting his first guest.

Let's make this one diffalicious!

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Scorpette · 13/05/2010 09:40

Lap is 24th, you crazy dreamer, Drom. Off to work now. MEH.

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Ariesgirl · 13/05/2010 09:39

Congrats FormerArchbishopofCanterbury (you get?). Hope you have a trouble-free and happy 9 months

Exciting news re stretchy pantsnot Meds!

Snogs and massages to chickenCasserole.

Today is a non-day. I am between end of droid and start of "fertile" period (ironic snort). How does one fill the days?

PerfectDromedary · 13/05/2010 09:32

Working. Honest.

Gin Hope sister's boyf is ok. A week is a very long time to wait for news.

Scorp Nah, being awake during SWI is hugely overrated. Plus, if you stay still for two weeks a bit after you shag then it's easier for everything to implant, right?

waves at all people. cass Tell us how the GP goes today, sick lady? and scorp what did they do for your pre-lap thingy? And is it on 18th, or have I made that up in my head?

Scorpette · 13/05/2010 09:04

LaurieMooreWinnerOfOrangePrizeForFiction, am I meant to be awake when letting TYF SWI me? Could this be where I've been going wrong? PS Fanks for fred reassurance

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laurielou · 13/05/2010 08:12

Congrats carey enjoy the Deli.

Medee congrats on the pantsnot. . Pliz to still have more sexy time, to make you awash with swimmers & FFJ. I'd wear a swimsuit & arm bands if I were you.

muse I hear you with work. Sadly am already at my desk. Gearing myself up to do some work. The boyf came in late from football last night, & woke me chanting & waving a flag, as Cardiff City are through to the play off finals. Tis important apparently. He doesn't even drink, so can't blame that. He was too excited to sleep, therefore I'm also kept awake. It was so tense that some poor bloke in the stand behind him had an actual heart attack!! Thankfully last night was our night off sexy time. However back on duty this evening. All I want to do is curl up & sleep. S'pose I still can if he's gentle

Am going to a psychic fair tonight. My sis loves all that shiz & seeing as I had nothing planned suggested we go along. I may have fortune told to find out when I'll win.

cass I know what you mean re unfriendly ovaries. But I choose to blame the boyf's swimmers for being too lazy to get to the Holy Grail or getting lost & being too pig headed to ask for directions. I'm a friendly kinda gal & reckon my ovaries are warm & welcoming too. Can't possibly be my fault, can it?

Full on tongue snogs to gin - hope your sis-boyf is ok - & scorps the "fred-keep-aliver".

Balls, my work is starting to turn on the flashing neon lights to draw my attention so better do somamat.

Stay beautiful!!

ginhag · 13/05/2010 07:25

EWCM FFJ, or pantsnot if you wanna be all poetic laydees.

medeeeeeeeeeeeee I would give you lots of sage advice re the contents of your pants but think you've been reassured. Good idea to jump his bones again tonight tho.

I really doubt we're gonna be lucky this month,what with ov time coinciding with abscess agony n all. Dunno if I even ov'd. I said that as if I normally chart or summat and have some clue what is going on...I don't of course.

Thanks for wishes re sisboyf. Had scan,about a week til he hears. Horrible,just hope all is fine.

stewie I've lost track of how long you have been trying,I have a feeling I may have to give you a motivational kicking talk. Cos I'm so upbeat n that innit.

And congrats Carey they will be waiting with mouldy cheese and pate at the deli.

Muser · 12/05/2010 23:15

I am v excited by meedledee's FFJ. I sense good things acoming.

Meanwhile, I have been out of the office all day and am bloody knackered. I wish I didn't have to work tomorrow.

Muser · 12/05/2010 23:14

I am v excited by meedledee's FFJ. I sense good things acoming.

Meanwhile, I have been out of the office all day and am bloody knackered. I wish I didn't have to work tomorrow.

Casserole · 12/05/2010 22:32

What lovely warm hands you've got.

Casserole · 12/05/2010 22:31

If the sperm are so bloody long lasting then how fucking unfriendly ARE my eggs? Am put in mind of Monica from Friends when told her uterus is an "inhospitable environment" - "but I've always tried so hard to be a great hostess"!

Fuckingbastardingcuntybollocks.

Revising. Pain back. Though not as bad, before you all turn up at door with taxi. Oh God, actually please DO turn up at my door with taxi. Big fuck off one full of gin. Let's go get slaughtered.

Medee · 12/05/2010 22:31

right, am off to bed to be horizontal and help the swimmers find their way up.

Scorpette · 12/05/2010 22:30

Occers, your day sounds like it's been a bag of arse. Would a quick grope behind the aspidistra help?

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Scorpette · 12/05/2010 22:24

Medeeval, yup, last night's jizz should be good to go - it lasts for a few days. And just cos you've got EWCM doesn't mean today is the day you OV. You could well Ov tomorrow or even in a few days, depending on how long it lasts for. I think if you did it last night and do it again tomorrow then you're in with a v good chance. After all, the Docs advise making a sexy every 2 days, so GOOD LUCK!

Well done CLW.

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Ocarina · 12/05/2010 22:23

Ooooh, presence of EWCM is v exciting! (I've never knowingly had any so am jealous, but v glad you do). I think sperm hang around for a few days so may well be there to do the deed, but SWI tomorrow sounds good if you can persuade him.

Congrats Carey, enjoy life in the deli.

Sending get well vibes to all who need them. Sounds like we need morphine drips rigged up round here as well as gin.

I'm at the spotting updiff symptoms when just past the end of droid and so clearly anything but stage. Why do I do this to myself? Been a weird couple of days - went to the worst funeral ever yesterday, not someone I knew well but it was taken by a spiritualist minister and she was awful (and not just because I disagree more than a little with her beliefs). So spent the rest of the day raging but having nowhere to direct the anger which didn't help. Menkulness appears to be part of life not just ttc!

careylouwho · 12/05/2010 22:23

Medee the swimmers should last a good few days, apparently they like to frollick in the egg-whity goodness.

Cass Thanks for good wishes. It's only been two months. I thought it'd be ages cuz I've been on birthcontrol since the mid 90's. Didn't think I was ovulating as I used OPKs but not managed to get one to turn either month so thought I was still adjusting - guess not.

Medee · 12/05/2010 22:21

ta, muse.

Muser · 12/05/2010 22:17

Sperm lasts a good few days Medee you ought to be fine.

I am producing bucket loads of EWCM. Bloody useless to me. Anyone want some? Sod sprinkling baby dust, EWCM water balloons anyone?

Medee · 12/05/2010 22:04

Nooooooo!

Anyway.. headache good news for your BF, and fingers crossed in a Southwesterly direction.

So, TMI alert.

We SWI'ed last night. I just went to the loo and have proper stretchy EWCM - first time ever (fingers crossed to actually be ovulating)... so my question is this...

there is no way I can get MrM to do it again tonight, so will the sperm from last night be still around by the time the egg makes its appearance? I should persuade him for tomorrow night.

Casserole · 12/05/2010 22:00

Wow Carey. 2 posts and then an updiffment, that must be a record. Well, very best of luck to you, enjoy the PESH deli, I hear they're lovely. How long had you been trying?

careylouwho · 12/05/2010 21:16

Um, I feel a bit bad as I'm a BESHie-come-lately and all but it would appear that I'm diffed. The CB digital told me it was true and everything. I know I've not posted much but I've lurked lots and think you're all swell [doffs cap imploringly]

gin hope your sisters BF is ok and your tooth gets better (or bearable) quickly

Scorps So not a Fred Killer - you keep the fred alive, baby! Good luck with dildocam

Scarecrow I'll miss you most of all!

Hope to see you all on the other side very soon x

Scorpette · 12/05/2010 20:41

Everyone hates Scorps The Fred Killer

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Scorpette · 12/05/2010 18:21

YoYoYO! Soz haven't been in today till now, but have spent all morning having pre-op assessment for the lap (am much more okay about it all now) and have felt really ill; couldn't sleep cos was having Tory government nightmares! Am also ravenously hungry. Hmmm.

Anyway, am sending big luck vibes to GinSisBoyf down Kernow way. I hope all will be well - it must be a horrible time for them both.

And yet more vibes for gin's tooth and Tagine's back and kicks, snogs, gropes and earlobe-flicks to the rest of you slaaaaaaaaaaaags!

Huzzah for Head's BESHwin pal!

And Gin, I've had a tooth removed and I have really dense bones and strong teeth, so it was a barrel of laughs BUT the relief at getting the fucker out was indescribable. And now I can do a freaky missing-tooth pirate face to scare small children at parties!

Am now off to see what I can have to eat! (Have already had: porridge, steak and salad, BIG portion of home-made veg chilli and brown rice. Worra bloater!)

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Casserole · 12/05/2010 17:52

Just a quickie to say sorry not been in sooner today but been working and flat out. Only just seen the advice, so I wasn't ignoring you honest!

Just to say pain's been much lessened today, though not gone entirely, so will mention to GP tomrrow morning. Am feeling well otherwise so going to hang on for that. Thanks so much tho for the concern, was mucho appreciated.

Will post more, got one more client to go then am collapsing in a heap with a takeaway as a protest.

Hope all well with everyone else. Will read back thru later when have more time.

laurielou · 12/05/2010 13:42

Will your sis boyf get immediate results? Poor love. My friend had a recent brain scan due to sever headaches. Thankfully it was clear. Now diagnosed with cluster headaches & given uber strong painkillers. She's perked up a treat. Hope for similar results for the boyf.

head meant to say congrats to BESHtest friend. Its always good news to hear of a win.

bess if only it were that easy to win! Sorry you've been feeling poorly. Have fun at the scan. Half way there..........

Bessie123 · 12/05/2010 13:33

Sorry, gin of course, will be keeping everything crossed for sis bf.