30s TTC - Our BESH GussetWatch Ever, With Guest Star Joe Mangel!

Muse, your outstanding queries regarding tubes and cysts sound sensible and important to me. Given what you've been through, I don't think anyone would think it unreasonable for you to ask at least your GP, if not the folks that were treating you for ectopic. I imagine this is wishful thinking, but don't suppose you can call/email someone at the hospital?

Oh Scorpy, does it help at all to know that we are here for you and think you are awesome and genuinely understand your pain because we feel it too?

Good idea from Muse re: the 20 minute chunks. We could just cuddle for 20 mins if you likey?

And I am going to take my own advice and do 20 minutes of actual work. Seriously, only way I can get through dull reports is to do this routine. I allow myself a 5 minute break after every 20 minutes of solid work.

Oh yes, I go for the Monty Python form of violence.

What I think you need is manageable chunks of things to do. Get a kitchen timer. Set it for 20 minutes. In that 20 minutes do something. As you are a good writer I think you should write. Doesn't matter what you write, just keep going for the 20 minutes. Tada! Achievement.

Also works for: mad cleaning sprees, dancing round the living room to loud music, gardening, kicking a pillow repeatedly, or doing a full on cry. Once the 20 minutes is up, you do something else for 20 minutes. And that way the day does go.

Poor Scorps It is shit. And feeling like this is one of the hardest things to deal with in this whole annoying process. Is it being magnified for you this month because of the no SWIaction?

Am listening and lurking but have many works, so hopefully others will be along to comfort also.

Fingers crossed for you, Lyra. Will be there in gin/vodka/rum/spirit of your choice.

I know what you mean about pre-SWI testing - would have saved me a lot of money in pregnancy tests, opks and their ilk. Probably comes down to NHS priorities, though - no point in sending the fertile for tests that shagging will prove are not worth it, then they can concentrate resources on people who are more likely to need help. While in the States, insurers/the patient are paying for tests, so they do more testing - on those with health insurance...

Muse I dare you go to the GP and say exactly that.

I hope this afternoon goes well Lyra. As Scorps says, we will be there in spirit.

On the subject of tests, do you think I ought to be concerned that as far as I know nobody has peered at mah tubes to see why Bob2 didn't make it to the wombular area? I also never found out about the ovarian cysts they saw. Now that's British. You have all got me wondering whether I ought to go to the GP and say "Oi, can I get my rat out for someone pls?"

Thanks Scorpy, love you

I can't help thinking about what Mountie said, that in the US you would have all of the tests that we are just getting into now at the pre-conception stage. Whilst that could be considered overly interventionist (and not exactly romantic), I find it appealing in a Girl Guides "be prepared" way.

It is a rollercoaster, isn't it? Kind of found myself on it by accident - thought I was starting the menopuase (don't ask!) & ended up leaving doc with a referral to FC!

To be honest, I think its only the last few months I've started to take it all a bit more seriously & start to question things.

Pliz to see earlier post re "Britishness". I'm in awe of doctors & don't think to question them. Stoopid!

Cameltoe, that is great news, chuffed for you.

I hope Aries is taking Scorps kick-ass advice on evil accountant.

Both parents and ILs read the Daily Heil. In their defence, they know not what they do, although we have tried to explain. Drives me mad, especially when they start spouting absolute claptrap that can only have emanated from that source.

I have gynae appt at 2pm . HO not coming with . I kind of wish I'd asked for referral sooner, feel like I've wasted loads of time . But I suppose I didn't know it wasn't going to happen naturally (although I never really thought it would).

Laurie, you don't use a day 3 to compare against a day 21 - day 3 is FSH/LH, day 21 is progesterone. The day 21 shows whether or not you have ovulated (progesterone 30 or more), it's the crucial one and it doesn't need to be compared against a baseline. My GP was reluctant to do a day 3 test at all, I had to ask on two separate occasions and then beg a bit! Also I think with clomid they should ultrasound track you on the first cycle, but don't have to do so after that (the guidance says "at least" the first cycle).

laurie If cho's around anywhere, she's your best person to talk to about Clomid. I think some doctors hand it out like magic candy...But is not naivety and FC fuckwittery - it's really hard to take any control back once the IF rollercoaster starts.

Scorps Bless you, you're very lovely. And will be pregnant very soon with all the good shit that you are doing. I KNOW

Plus, if I have IVF octuplets, you can totally have one.

perfect nope, no monitoring. Well, I had 1 dildocam after 1st dose of Clomid to check number of follicles, but that's all. Not good, is it?

Also they tested follicle size on CD9. Said they usually like to do it CD11/12. So while my follicles looked OK, they were still on the small side.

I'm winding myself up now at my naivity & FC fuckwittery.

GAH!!!!

scorps you & your dad are the biz!

I love it when the BESH get feisty. Makes me feel all empowerfulled on everyone's behalf.

You're all gorgeous. That is my helpful and considered contribution to todays menkulness.

Muse Say no to group weight loss. Diets are horrible and you don't need anything else fucking with your head at the moment.

Aries Scorp knows all. Listen to the voice of reason. Also, I am almost 33 - have no idea whether that makes you feel better or worse, but love the idea that it can even be considered very young.

Laurie Have they not been monitoring you with the Clomid, then?

Mountie Mutant tests were to see if there was a genetic reason for TNB's

Oh, & if I don't win this month am going back to FC. At the start of this process with GPs' etc I was in a bit of a daze. Only now has it dawned on me I've only had day 21 bloods which were fine. Eh? There's no day 3 bloods to compare it to. Also fine. What's "fine"? I have no idea of figures. Together with the times I've taken my temp my charts being all over the shop does make me wonder if all is as it should be. And therefore Clomid may not be the answer.

Sorry, bit mememe. Just thinking out loud really.

cho yeah the goop is for super-diffed quality only. So I'll try it on me own afterwards. Oh joy.

That's also fab news about moving along with IVF. Really pleased & have a very good feeling about it.

aries surely, surely arse-wipe of an accountant can't expect you to pay to correct his fuck up? How can that be? That said it may be a small price (metaphorically speaking) to pay to get the end result you want. Alternatively if you want to send us BESH's around to slap ac-cunt-ant with a wet fish, you let us know.

How did your mum find out about TTC? I'm close to my mum, but haven't told her. I'm sure she knows though, she always seems to know everything somehow. I kind of feel its gone too far for me to tell her now coz I've had some treatments etc. Also if your mum has gone into adoption mode after 5 cycles, my mum will spontaneously combust at my 36 cycles.

I think my family are typically British. Only see above. We're close, but don't open up much, we rely on mind reading skills. Which I have to say aren't too bad, especially between mum, sis & me. My dad feels totally left out when the 3 of us have a conversation full of "thingmagigs, wotsits & oojas" & know who & what we're talking about.

In other news I've cricked my back - drying my fucking hair - & it hurts every time I take a deep breath. Tonight is meant to be shagalicious. Fucking A!

Am here . Today not that great I'm afraid. Had to see business adviser and accountant and the accountant has messed up our accounts, yet appears to feel it's reasonable to charge us to correct them, and until he does that the bank won't consider any kind of loan. Anyone an accountant? Is that standard practice? Plus mother is still here and has found out about the ttc and is being a bit mad about it. Clearly she doesn't think I'm up to the task. She also started talking about IVF and adoption when she found out we're on cycle 5. Cycle 5? FFS! Oh but then added that of course we couldn't be considered for adoption as we're probably too old.