Emmsy's weebles - enjoying comfort, support and mini eggs, onwards and upwards!

Well here I am again - twice in a week So lovely to have a welcome back Am afraid I will have to post and run, as in work and time constrained with loads of managers about.

Big hugs for Monkey - you have not been far from my thoughts for some days now.

4EverWeeble - hope today stops you wobbling a little.

Musings for Mermaid

Today is the anniversay of my last short-lived BFP. I wasn't ready for it after the emotional trauma of my 12 week bloodbath scary MC in November 08 - wanted to have lost more weight, have my head in a better place etc. I kept going to the gym and doing some hardcore classes. I lifted bags of compost etc etc. I was scared to emotionally engage, convinced something was wrong and it wouldn't last.

OK - it didn't last beyond 6 weeks but what I regret each and every day is not embracing that pregnancy and giving it a chance. All I'm trying to say is that, despite the fibroids, despite your history, this could be your time and whether it is or it isn't, don't make my mistake and end up full of regret and monumentally screwed up mentally, but try to cautiously look to the future and will life into the spark inside you.

As for my stopping TTC - how old is too old to be a first time mum ? I'm 40.5 nearly. DP will be 45 this month. Is it fair / reasonable / practical to be starting a family now ? I have to be pragmatic, especially since DP seems to be incapable of performing at the moment - have not had a 2WW for 3 cycles now.

I have a holiday to look forward to - girlie trip to Washington and New York. We are off on 23rd of this month. Yes, I know I'm fertile this weekend and miracles might happen, but I'm trying to be realistic and keep control of my emotions / obsessions.

Living out of a suitcase again and working stoopid hours this week. Love you all and will be back soon x x

hi. Just dashing in and out.

for mermaid and a tonne of sand. we're here for you every step of the way.

Huge hugs to Louey 4ever and monkey. thinking of you all lots.

Happy belated b'day to Sabs and big hug for a sad anniversary.

MLS Loved the post. Hope you're feeling a bit better now.

Hi to everyone else and thanks for all the lovely comments on my birth story.

Oh poor monkey - am thinking of you very much at the mo. x

blue house situation is that nothing happening! Am v. envious of your garden antics... we have only a few small flower beds, so cannot be very adventurous!

re: bump pic - I've just put one on my profile.

Oh poor monkey ... mermaid I feel so bad, i keep on forgetting to answer you when you were asking about saara's excema It seems to have cleared up so maybe your right, it was linked to her teething, as she doesn't seem to be teething right now. I get so confused as to how this teething lark works but i never would have thought to link it if you didn't suggest it so thank you. How are you feeling today? Thanks to you and 4ever for your kind words on this anniversary. Also holding a hand out to mls and 4ever for their appointments today. Apologies for crappy post, i'm posting from phone. Off to have lunch with best friend and Saara together for the first time, but will try to lurk for news

oh monkey

Finally, before i weeble back to hosp for 3rd apt in 5days, spare a thought for our poor monkey, heard from her last night the poor soul... : 'Ps. 4got 2 update - am back in hospital :-( Have had wot feels like contractions since sat + high temp + turns out there is placenta left inside. Am on IV anti-b's + having op on Thurs. Seems neverending this ordeal :-( xxx' ..... Just cant believe what this lovely lady is goin thru.. She is v strong & brave tho & sends hugs & love to u all ...

Mls hand holds for hospital today... Im hopeful for you hon.. We can weeble together & hopefully bounce out reassured & positive!

Mermaid lovely lady... Could only sum up in wee small hours as this is so ur time, and as u see from wake up tx moment ago, u were first thing on my mind! Understandably you will be petrified, but as i just said, i will pray 4 u in hosp chapel in a bit and i do believe in miracles, specially for a lady as deserving as u are... Big hugs x x x x x

sabs I can't see your photos at all. I would so love to go to the the Ritz what a lovely present. Sad thoughts for your anniversary I am so glad you have that cheeky young lady to hug.

This year you and vjay will only be feeling the sun shine on your backs as you run around after those crawlers

moon honey nothing taken in bad way at all, just I have wished this for you for so long. But yes indeed they come in 3s

4ever thank you for summing up in the early hours cos I was getting confused and now I understand. I am so sorry that your last week at work which I know is hard enough is being overshadowed with more worry. So good that you are going straight in today though. I am sure that they have eagle eyes on you young lady.
And what were they thinking showing anyone fango scissors eek ignore. Thinking of you masses this morning, have image of you parting pedestrians in your wake down the highstreet

Insomniac weeble lurkin.. Saga update: (sorry 4 another me post ) After a good but scary ante natal class about pain relief & birth where, amongst other things we were shown forceps, catheters, fanjo scissors, & a birth video, Dh & i spoke to nice midwife doin class about worries of glucose result who told us to check with ante natal unit, we did so & another lovely midwife checked blood results which were back already & after what felt like an eternity (10mins!) told us that were above normal range of 3-6 at 7.2, she said normally only confirm gestational diabetes when over 8, & as hadnt fasted wasnt conclusive, however has booked us in to see diabetes specialist midwife at 10.30 tomorrow.. Will prob be sent home with one of those pinprick kits to self monitor for a few days.. Im not good with needles, i just wanted to go to work for a few hours as planned for my last week.. now will only be goin in on thurs & to leave on fri.. Really its good its bein dealt with quick so i can get peace of mind & do whatever needs to be done but just gutted thought i was nearly on the home straight with only 7 & a bit wks to go.. Worried about relation to 2 vessel cord as missin an artery that removes waste, & baby is off the scale big, when typically 2 vessel cord means she should be small? Have list of questions to ask.. Dont understand either as pre preg i have hypoglycemia which is Low blood sugar, just eat reguarly & lots of carbs but have real sweet tooth & always carry sugar fix with me, idea of havin to cut sugar out is wierd, obviously will just readjust diet as required but just shocked really.. Wonderin if induction may now become real issue as baby so big? Next scan in 2wks & consultant will review after along with results but as she was 4lb 9 3wks ago im well expecting her to be near 7lb by then... People on the street, shops etc look horrorfied when i tell them still 7wks to go, everyone thinks im ready to pop im so huge...

Aw sabs our 1st lost angel would have been 2 tomorrow... Wierd.. Thinkin of ya, we will light our special 4 angel candle as we now do on any lost angels significant dates, its become our 'thing' to mark dates... Small comforts n all that...

Aw sabs our 1st lost angel would have been 2 tomorrow... Wierd.. Thinkin of ya, we will light our special 4 angel candle as we now do on any lost angels significant dates, its become our 'thing' to mark dates... Small comforts n all that...

Hey ladies, hope everyone is well

mermaid I'm sorry, I'm trying hard not to get too excited but I cant help it

moon I'm not giving up hope for you either for this month

monkey I feel so at what you had to go through. Hope you're getting lots of rest

blue We need to see a photo of your garden now!

4ever Hope your ongoing saga's is not bad news

iggy looking forward to seeing your bump pic

Was I the only one who couldnt find neeko's birth story? I swear, my brain is so frazzled. Can someone add a link for me? Pretty please? Neeko Saara grew out of her newborn clothes pretty quickly. Lucky we have a Next close by!

vjay I thought of you the other day when I was watchin E Entertainment news and Jennifer Love Hewitt was on there talking about vajazzling Saara's doing 360 turns but no crawling yet! I really need to do some babyproofing around the house

buddha Hope your boys are feeling better

cupcake Yay to finishing work soon. How long are you having off work?

mls at your post

jools so lovely to see you on here, though to me it feels like you're not that far as I always farming. Have fun on your hols and come back here soon!

louey After reading your post, I just wanted to give you a hug

questions Can I give you a hug too?

curly at least the weather is getting better for walks. Saara sleeps much better in the day as well if shes been outside

lbm any progress on names?

barbie safe journey home tomorrow

Sabs waves to gracie thepfj mrskate baking sorry for missing anyone or any significant news. DId I mention my brain is frazzled??

Thanks for your messages on my birthday. As the weather was lovely, we spent a lot of it outside eating lots of yummy food and just enjoying the sun. DH got me a voucher for lunch at the Ritz for two

Feeling quite tired as we've been out every day and have something planned every day this week as well! We had our first buggyfit class this morning which was very good (but now I'm aching lots!) I've signed up for 6 weeks to motivate me to carry on going

By the way I posted 2 new photo's of Saara last week but no-one commented on them. (not that im expecting compliments lol) But can someone check they can see them, as I changed the settings so only my MN friends can see them (i.e. you all) Thank you!

My lost angel would have been 1 year old tomorrow. Feeling lots of conflicting emotions but I feel so so grateful that I have Saara. Will be kissing and cuddling her even more than usual tomorrow

Night all.

oh mermaid i didnt mean what i said in a bad way, i am really genuinely happy for you, although reading back i didnt put congratulations, arrgghh the trouble with typing stuff eh?! i am more than happy for you to get the 1st bfp, they always come in 3s right

moon I would so gladly have let you have this bfp at the moment most lovely lady. I am so sorry and know the ache of happiness for someone else. None of us are leaving as barbie always says till you have written a birth story simular to neekos blue I have given up even trying to spot my errors. Lovely to see you with the gardenign bug, what tomatoes? You are streets ahead of me may have to bypass the seed growing and go for the toddler version.

buddha that is one nasty bug that our lovely E has had to put up with, sorry and you of course. Hope that you are all ok apart from nasty bug though, all the sun you have had up there will drive the nasties away.

cupcake omg you must tell us when he is on

mls please don't get your laptop repaired at least for another week. I am thinkig you have a hospital appointment tomorrow? fingers xed.

monkey gorgeous lady it is so the way with our thread/life I know you know this but it never makes any of it any easier. Heaps of love and hope your body and spirit are slowly on the mend.xxx

louey oh dear seeing your confusion has made me realise that I am as mad as a bunch of frogs and that everyone else is used to me being so, shudder.
I have a ds who is 8 and then 5 mc, the last mc was just before christmas when they discovered I had fibroids.
So I hid in the sand for a while and when I finally went to the dr was told that the consultant doesn't consider fibroids to be a risk at all won't take them out and no follow up.
So despite several amazing ladies who have been trying to get me to do something about it all me and dh had decided again (agggghhhh thud) to hang up our baby making hats only at some point in March one of us must have forgotten this

Queue such mind numbing fear that I cannot describe.

jools enjoy your crossing off your holiday countdown. We love you lots.x

iggy yes we do need an updated photo. Rest lots.

qa that is a horrid to not know where you are in all this. Thoughts and mini eggs.

4ever please stay calm

red pen corner:

curly - colic not cold

went to bed not wnt to be...

Also Hi LBM - at your boss. Three weeks to go - yay!

So much to comment on, so little brain to do it with

mermaidohmygod - "OMG" as Janice would say in Friends (one for you there cupcake ). Oh honey, so want this to be your time, willing it to be so and squeezing your hand until it throbs. Time for golfer to stick his nine iron - ahem...

MLS - nearly PMSL at your coded keys missing post - too funny . Like something out of 'Allo Allo or a pished Rab C Nesbit. Will be thinking about you tomorrow x

4ever - late pregnancy sucks, it really does. Its so painful, uncomfortable, worrying leakages the whole shebang. Add that to your already high anxiety levels and its going to have you wobbling. Just keep having the check ups and reassurance. Feeling for you for Friday, bittersweet finishing up great to be on mat leave but to be leaving 14 years of memories..

Vjay - love the Ajay on the loose stories . We have a serious LEGO situation in our house so I'm going to have to check Ben's mouth every two seconds when he can start to get around.

Neeko - loved your birth story - you earth mother you . It just sounds so amazing to scoop baby up so primal and how its meant to be. I can still feel a little down at never experiencing that with my two c-sections but I'm not greedy and am blessed with my boys...

Buddha - glad little E and big C are on the mend!

Iggy - loving your carrot cake photo on fb - yum! What's the latest on your house?

Curly - glad that the walking is helping with the cold and of curlygirl sleeping from midnight. I'm still up every three hours during the night - B is such a hungry boy. Really going to try and persevere with the bottle of formula as I would love him to be able to take one in time for me to go out and get rat arsed have a few on my birthday on 29th May (the same weekend that Sex and the City 2 opens)

Louey - really feeling for you and your ttc dilemma with your DH... The best thing is to keep talking and working through it together which you're doing. Maybe your mc is all too raw for him. Us women just want to bang on ttc as its the only way to take out pain away but its so different for them...

QA - sorry to hear you have had more bleeding but you seem to have turned the corner with your negative test and signs of ovulating. Time to dust yourself down and start waxing again ....talking of which...

...moon glad you had a bust practice weekend. told you we would be quiet

Jools - lovely to hear from you. Been keeping an eye on you on fb. When are you off to Washington?

Sabs - you and Saara sound like you're having lots of fun joining your classes and getting out there

Phew! I'm knackered. All fine here other than bottle strike. Had a fantastic day in garden yesterday, in-laws over to literally 'hold the baby' and I was off, pruning, weeding, composting, sweeping, planting, man I love my garden . DS1 and me planted the tomato and courgette seeds in pots which are on window sill at the mo'. Wnt to be with the garden equivalent of 'tennis elbow' seceteers hands .

night all and apologies if I've x-posted as usual...

Mermaid - , ,

It's going to be fine, it's going to be fine, it's going to be fine.

btw - have you been sitting on mls'S cushion in the greenhouse, you getting all fertile on us? And at your great age too - said by someone who is very close behind you!

4ever 3 weeks to mat leave not D day - well ds was 3 weeks early and did arrive on the Sunday after I had started mat leave on the Friday. This little lady is going to be little better behaved and let mummy have some rest first!

Got to go and read neekos birth story and then finish my objectives that my prat of a boss is really dragging out. I'm going to be reviewing them in 2 weeks time ffs!

Love to all

Also.... Hello Jools lovely! You been missed!

Also loving MLS message! Hand holds for tomorrow...

Louey hugs for the ttc battle... Hope it gets easier...

Right just pounced on PC as DH was about to download tunes to Ipod so better go but will be lurking... Will fill you in on my sagas tomorrow.... x x x x x

WAH HEY!!!!!!! YEA to Mermaid! Got tx in homebase and literally let out a squeal!!!!! Am soooooooooooooooooooo excited, I owe you so much hand holding as you have done for me over the months, ooooh and the Vjay/Emmsys doppler - yours when you want it! Call that doc! Cyclogest and an 'up yours' to the golfer! LOVE YA HON! You soooooooooo derserve this to be your time.... HUGS x x x x x

omg mermaid i think curly and her cheerleading squad must have descended on you first!

mls love the gobbeldy-gook message, who ate your keys?

jools please come and tell us more, we can listen and maybe help, we miss having you around

louey i feel so for you, i want to come over there are give you a great big squishy hug. i dont know if it helps at all, but after my 2nd mc, my df said he didnt want to ttc again, but in the end we had a break for 3 months, (which killed me but in hindsight was a good idea) and then started ttc again. i'm just saying he might come round but know theres also the possibility he might not. definitely good you can talk about it though thats half the battle.

mermaid its has just taken me a while to work out what is going on but wooooohooooo!!!! Don't know all your history but lots of handholding and mini-eggs for you.

moon think mermaid has just taken pressure off you

mls lol at the missing keys

Lovely birth story neeko - that's what i would like too!

vjayjay Hope you feeling bit better re: pain?

mls funny message - am glad you out of hosp and hopefully feeling better?

curly glad colic is better - you sound v. happy in your posts

barbie hope you feeling warmer now!

mermaid I'll have to put another pic up - am starting to look really quite round - but that may be easter egg related too....