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Original poster

Grr! Need a de-brief after seeing gynae consultant!

32 replies

lilysma · 09/03/2010 20:42

Saw gynae consultant today (with DH) after 8 months unsuccessfully TTC and having increasing back-pain, PMS and spotting before AF (4-5 days which is new for me in last few months).

I really shouldn't be surprised but he was totally rude, cursory and dismissive of any of my experiences and totally uninterested in my symptoms or problems beyond the potential (secondary) infertility. I have been charting and produced these, which suggest ovulation, to be dismissed with "not very reliable", a breath before suggesting that he would probably prescribe clomid (but we would have to pay for it privately as we have a DD - this was news to me). He kept getting my basic history totally wrong as well, having obviously not read my notes and not being bothered to ask. Anyway, the upshot is that he's going to do more blood tests (no big surprises).

I'm still trying to disentangle my reaction (from the initial rage ) but just wanted to check a few things out with anyone who has any experience of these matters...

Is spotting for 4 days before AF with back pain 'completely normal' ("I can't think why your GP thought this needed checking out")? Lots of things I have read suggest it isn't, and it certainly isn't for me. My ultrasound and basic bloods were fine.

Does the presence of a corpus luteum cyst on my ovary (as seen on ultrasound) suggest that I ovulated this cycle?

Outrage and similar stories of horrible gynaes will of course be welcome too

OP posts:
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Original poster
lilysma · 13/03/2010 08:38

Oh, I see littlesilver! Sorry...

Keziahhopes sorry to hear that, bloody typical! Hope you get your appointment soon.

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Keziahhopes · 12/03/2010 23:17

lilysma - so sorry you got such a poor response. 2nd opinion is your right.

-- I am awaiting an appointment to be released by this not so wonderful choose and book system - having just found out after 3mths of asking for referral and 18mths ttc#1 that the pct suddenly changed its age limit for any free help from 39 to 35 and I am 34.5!!

  • hope you get what you need.
LittleSilver · 12/03/2010 22:22

No, have a look further back!

Original poster
lilysma · 12/03/2010 21:35

Littlesilver did you post this on the wrong thread? It's late, so maybe I've just missed the point...

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LittleSilver · 12/03/2010 19:12

Sorry Ariesgirl, that was not my intention .

FWIW, my experience has made me a HELLUVA lot more bolshy woman to deal with in pregnancy/labour. The mw who advised me she was going to just "pop a prostin in to get you going" was advisedly politely that tht was the last thing she would be doing with my cervix. My big regret was not getting a doula with dds1-3. Cast iron plan for dc4 though.

Best wishes, and hope you have a postive experience next time.

Original poster
lilysma · 12/03/2010 18:55

Thanks babybecks and lottie for your support and good suggestions.

Becks I will try the web people once I have worked out exactly what I want to know!

Sorry you had a rough experience too lottie. Why are these guys so arrogant when they are actually clearly just wrong about some things (e.g. 14 day luteal phase) !

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londonlottie · 12/03/2010 07:56

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BabyBecks · 12/03/2010 07:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
lilysma · 11/03/2010 21:03

Nor do I do emoticons properly

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Original poster
lilysma · 11/03/2010 21:02

Yes, why oh why would you go in to obs and gobs (as my clinical colleagues call it) if you actively dislike women?? [hmmm]. But many seem to... or maybe they see it as a good way to torture us!

Thanks for the bolding advice - I never read instructions properly

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Ariesgirl · 11/03/2010 20:56

It amazes me how many gynaes actually seem to dislike women. That tale is horrendous LittleSilver and it makes me dread seeing them all the more

Lilysma good luck. And oh, the bold thing - you need to put an asterisk around every word rather than the whole phrase!

Original poster
lilysma · 11/03/2010 20:51

Thanks babybecks, and I forgot to reply to your question re the US. I did have an internal one because my bladder wasn't full enough so they couldn't do an external one .

It strikes me that what the consultant I saw will do to 'check if I am ovulating' is measure progesterone at days 3 and 21, which is basically measuring the same thing as the charts since the temp change as I understand it is directly related to a rise in progesterone! Obviously the blood test is probably more accurate, but one is an indication that the other may come back normal, it seems to me. And also neither are infallible in proving that ovulation has happened. There were lots of questions I wanted to ask this guy about my charts, but he wasn't going there.

Hope all comes good with your nice gynae!

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BabyBecks · 11/03/2010 20:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
lilysma · 10/03/2010 22:16

Thanks, I will look it up!

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JoTheUnsure · 10/03/2010 22:13

This post may be a little late, but have you heard of an 'anti mullerian hormone'test www.advancedfertility.com/amh-fertility-test.htm

I had a text book first pregnancy, but then had to have an emergency ceaserean (sp) and my tubes got a bit tangled... I've had 2 (half) courses of IVF - both failed. Then insisted on an HSG and the other one (so one through key hole surgery, and the other where they go up your bits...).

I then found about this hormone test. it's more relaible than just an FSH test (mine all came back healthy) - and gives a greater indication of fertility levels. I had to pay for the test (just the cost of a blood test) but found it really useful.

Hope this helps.

Original poster
lilysma · 10/03/2010 22:07

Oh, and did I mean HSG, not HCG? Acronym confusion!

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Original poster
lilysma · 10/03/2010 22:07

I forgot to add thanks for the suggestions re PALS. I guess I could do that and still go ahead and get the tests and another referral (not that I want to have my cake and eat it )

Thanks for helping me think things through!

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Original poster
lilysma · 10/03/2010 22:03

Wow, I didn't manage to get back on for a while and am now overwhelmed by all your messages. Thanks so much for the support!

TBH I'm a bit embarrassed to be complaining when I read some of these experiences. Little Silver (sorry I can't get the bold to work) I am truly shocked at yours and agree that this was definitely assault and I would be tempted to follow it up too. Unbelievable (not literally of course, I do believe you!).

Barry Kent, this sounds like just the kind of attitude this gynae was displaying - the total assumption that you know nothing and that your experience counts for shit .

It saddens me to realise that women's health/gynae medicine still seems to be stuck in the dark ages and this is what our taxes are spent on . It does seem to be a cultural problem rather than 'a few bad eggs'.

My concern about trying to change consultants right now is that I guess it would take me back to square one with all the tests for infertility if I asked for a change now (wouldn't it?). It took a month to get the first appointment (not too bad, but the next one is another two months' time). But I'm glad some of you think it is worth asking for a second opinion on the menstrual stuff. I think I might have to go back to the GP and ask for a second referral to someone else just on that. To expect to be treated as a 'whole person' seems too much to ask for

Atilla thanks for your informed comments and questions as ever. To answer your questions, it was the NHS (our local women's hospital, where the care I have received in the past has been quite good, including treatment of an ectopic five years ago). I have had new pain in the lead up to AF (four or five days of lower back pressure and pain, which is completely new for me) as well as reasonably severe emotional symptoms (anxiety and lack of concentration) which are also new. Some of the latter may just be stress about TTC I guess, but it seems unlikely to explain the former symptoms. The problem is that I don't really know what kind of issues this might suggest. Endemetriosis? What is the reason for dismissing charts - I understand that they don't tell the whole story, but surely they offer some clues? But this guy was not interested in any detective work. But he is running an HCG as well as the usual bloods (Days 3 and 21) and sperm test for DH, so it seems worth getting the results from these at least!

Sorry, what a long post! Thanks again to everyone for your supportive posts and sharing your experiences. It is good to feel less along

OP posts:
BabyBecks · 10/03/2010 21:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsWajs · 10/03/2010 21:23

The one I mentioned upthread was female

elizabethsmum · 10/03/2010 20:29

Lilysma- To answer the corpus luteum question yes it is a good sign that you have recently ovulated and would be in the luteal phase of your cycle.

addictedtomn · 10/03/2010 20:26

i've not read all the replys but just wanted to say there are some crappy gyne's out there. when i lived in birmingham i saw a crappy one who didnt even write up my notes properly and surprise surprise they have gone missing.

but where i'm living now i have a lovley gyne, really supportive and listens to everything i tell her. i would suggest you ask to be refered to another gyne as your not getting on with this one. you are allowed to change, your post suggests that he is truley awful, ask your gp for a new referall asap.

stripeywoollenhat · 10/03/2010 20:07

littlesilver in your position i would be tempted to follow this up even now. fucker. just as a matter of curiosity, are the vile gynaes all male (i am not implying that all male gynaes are horrid, incidentally) or has anyone come across a horrible female one?

BarryKent · 10/03/2010 19:58

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LittleSilver · 10/03/2010 19:47

Oh, and you wanted Takes of Horrible Consultants? OK, here goes:

I was 19 and had PCOS to extent was menstruating about twice a year. Referred to gynae and on examination found I had a cervical polyp. The SHO doesn't know what to do, so calls for consultant. Consultant tells me to face the wall and procedes to pull out the polyp with NO warning, NO local and NO explanation. All the time questioning me very aggresively about why I though I might have problems conceiving.

Oh God, I've burst into tears writing that.

Right, and the 19 year old me bursts into tears too. I felt like someone had assaulted me (which, thinking about it, they had) He eventually apologised very perfunctorily.

Oh yes, and the reason it had hurt so bloody much? Because it wasn't cervical, it was uterine and actually had progressed through the os into my cervix. I know this because he only broke off the stem and I had to have it re-done under GA a year later. I cried all the way home on the bus. I wish I'd complained. I wish I'd bloody sued.

No-one should have to put up with the "care" you received OP.