Active discussions

Help protect children from gaming harms.

Take our survey

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Are you (a) tired of ttc (b) have sore ladybits from SWIing ! If this sounds like you then hop aboard.

993 replies

Icedlemonmuffin · 24/02/2010 11:51

Hi have made a new batch of cock tail muffins for those of us who have been trying for along time and

(a) are struggling to get excited by the sight of a cockadoodle running towards every other day of our fertile days !!

(b)have sore ladybits from all the SWIing we have been doing the past few months

and

(c) who just want to moan,groan and bitch how boring it can all get!

All funny sperm killing stories welcome I need a laugh and to know I'm not the only one going insane ttc

So hop aboard and you to can be a bus whore like me !!!!!!!!

OP posts:
PollyPoo · 10/04/2010 11:37

Ok, now a serious question for you all.... does anyone ever get months where all of a sudden, the idea of having a baby seems like a very bad idea?

After nearly two years of craving another child so much it physically hurts, now I'm thinking that actually a baby would get in the way of our plans to move to cornwall and start a new business. What the hell is wrong with me?!

Fairygodmother1 · 10/04/2010 08:24

Yep bonked the bar man! Wonder if I'll se him again???

Original poster
Icedlemonmuffin · 09/04/2010 21:55

Fairy are you drunk or bonking the bar man!

Off to bed with lots of lube and tissues.

OP posts:
Fairygodmother1 · 09/04/2010 20:58

That wasn't question was supposed to be !

Fairygodmother1 · 09/04/2010 20:57

This is true? Naked men aint so hot!

Original poster
Icedlemonmuffin · 09/04/2010 20:09

Here is a dick observation- why are they so ugly?

OP posts:
Fairygodmother1 · 09/04/2010 20:00

Dh now thinks all I do all day is talk about dick!!!

Loujalou · 09/04/2010 18:54

Played not paid!

Loujalou · 09/04/2010 18:54

You will be shocked but me and TH actually had a horny kiss this morning. Anyway as I am still on my rtd there was not funny business. Well only the vibrating kind.

I would have sex with Batman if it was when The Clooney paid the part. Think Christian Bale is a tad intense. Give me the Clooney any day. Though there are rumours on MN that he is gay.

Original poster
Icedlemonmuffin · 09/04/2010 18:36

That would mean that Dick got you into trouble with his dick! Not sure what batman is doing working behind a bar but if he gets you preggers Fairy then dick has done his job! Sorry this cold has sent me dick crazy!

OP posts:
Fairygodmother1 · 09/04/2010 18:30

LOL - Or Dick as he's also known when not in a mask & living with Bruce

Original poster
Icedlemonmuffin · 09/04/2010 18:27

Lol Lou I really need to check my spelling before I post!

OP posts:
Loujalou · 09/04/2010 18:23

If she gets pregnant with Batman's baby will that mean she will have to call the baby Robin or Bruce?

Fairygodmother1 · 09/04/2010 18:19

I'll try to avoid sex on the beach - that sand can really irritate!

Original poster
Icedlemonmuffin · 09/04/2010 16:18

Fairy just don't get to drunk and end up having a one night stand with the batman, you might get preggers!!! Oh don't forget your sun cream and take your knickers off so you don't have any White bits!

OP posts:
Fairygodmother1 · 09/04/2010 16:08

I think the bar man will appreciate it very much! He's working a split shift so I'll make sure he's eats before starting at the bar.

Original poster
Icedlemonmuffin · 09/04/2010 15:32

Well if your are on your hols Fairy you can get drunk every night and flash your bits at the bar man!

It's lovely outside and I've got a terrible cold, dd went to play at the neighbours (think she got sick of me moaning) and I'm sat in bed eating stolen leftover Easter egg!!!

Hope every else is enjoying the weather, well you must be because this thread is really quite.

OP posts:
Fairygodmother1 · 09/04/2010 14:20

Lol! I like that thread. Could get Mr FG1 to join in the chat!

I'm at my parents dog sitting so pretending I'm on holiday lol!

Original poster
Icedlemonmuffin · 08/04/2010 12:58

Hi we should start 'wanking into a pot' thread for all the oh out there though I would rather do that than have a smear !

I have a sore throat and a cold so I'm in bed feeling sorry for myself while dh entertains dd or should that be the other way round?

OP posts:
Fairygodmother1 · 08/04/2010 09:06

Lol! I don't know if our hospital has one but we don't drive & even if we did although you can see the hospital from my back garden the traffic would be a nightmare. That way I know he's done it & hand it in straight away!

Not that I'm controlling in any way

Loujalou · 08/04/2010 08:50

Mine is going on Friday though he does his at home and keeps it close to him (EWWWWHHHH!) on his journey to the hospital. Not sure if he would go for the hospital loos. In one hospital we were in (for a different reason) they had a wank room. I bet its best not to look at the carpet.

Fairygodmother1 · 08/04/2010 08:34

LOL! Looks like Mon or Tues is his next trip!

UmBongo · 07/04/2010 20:43

Go Mr FairyG - in a hospital loo! Wow! He is a good fella, doing as he is told!

I don't know if stress is a factor, it probably is as that would make it really difficult to solve!

You're right Lou I think mum has diversified into amateur biology. DH does drink quite a lot of coffee tho, but one of my friends is a gp and says that it has no effect.

Fairygodmother1 · 07/04/2010 17:27

Typical! My cons PA has gone on holiday for a week as of 5pm! Got through to another cons PA & she's arrange for DH to repeat the tests on Tues. He hasn't complained yet about doing it, even when I had him doing it in the hospital toilet!!! He didn't need my help

Fairygodmother1 · 07/04/2010 17:16

I'm the eldest of 3, mum fell preg pretty quick even with endo so I don't think she understands. My sister fell pretty quick with her two &like I said my bro's girlf made out it was hard (after 3 months)!

I think stress is also a bit factor in my lack of baby producing. I have said to DH that he could get pissed on a night out & have more chance of making some random girl pg than me. Thats when I'm feeling really down.

Still waiting for hosp to call back again. May phone them again!