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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

To TTC or not to TTC, that is one of the many questions...

964 replies

YorkshireTeaDrinker · 16/02/2010 10:56

Ok fellow ditherers, as we have filled up one thread (and still not made too many firm decisions) here's another one for us to continue to procrastinate and worry on.

Here's to more monitoring of relative green and redness, mutual support and occassional chivving, discussion of everything baby or not baby related, and perhaps even our first BFP...?

OP posts:
lizardqueenie · 10/03/2010 08:10

confused well done for your dog training. Must take patience. I would like to train my cats - particularly not to drop their food in a trail all over the kitchen floor that I've just washed. Grr.

Talking about weight gain - when I saw the GP and told him what I weigh - I explained I was concerned about my weight - although I am quite tall it appears I am in the obese category and and therefore he reckons the midwives will badger me into not gaining anymore my trying to loose fat & replace it with baby so either weighing the same or loosing some. Its the biggest kick up the (lardy) bum I've needed in ages. I've lost 12lbs since the new year so thats a start. A, looking into doing Slimming World whilst I am pg.

YTD bless your mate, I hope she's ok?
When have you got your midwife appointment? Also what is your due date again? We might be quite close?

Sat at my parents last night watching OBEM, how I kept stuum I'll never know. Really felt so much for both of those girls.

Original poster
YorkshireTeaDrinker · 09/03/2010 21:59

Confused! What a moronic thing to say. Am indignent for you!

Currently weeping my way through OBEM. Had a bot of a hectic day today. My best mate's waters broke early last night and she's currently in hospital trying not to leak anymore. They are hoping that she can get through to the weekend before starting labour, as baby is only 33 weeks and they'd like it to get a bit bigger.

I had to skive out of a meeting early and go to M&S to buy emergancy pants and nighties. She hadn't got as far as packing the hospital bag yet!

OP posts:
confuseddoiordonti · 09/03/2010 20:20

Hmm. Still pissed off with the pregnant comment but I guess it proves my worries about having put on weight are not unfounded

Watching OBEM tonight and rather looking forward to it. Weirdly, DH is in the front room watching Supernanny and tutting. I am a very proud parent today though as I have, after MONTHS of effort, taught my dog to walk off-lead on the streets. Still taking it slow but we're really getting there

HoneyPetal · 09/03/2010 18:58

Tell me about it. Gits.

lizardqueenie · 09/03/2010 17:36

OMG confused - I am really pissed off for you.

confuseddoiordonti · 09/03/2010 17:18

Someone looked at my stomach today and asked me if I 'was expecting.'

Not fucking happy.

lizardqueenie · 07/03/2010 23:39

YTD thanks for that. I have been knackered too - and bloody freezing too.

Also I couldnt sleep a while ago so came back down and logged on but now I am really quite sleepy again so I shall return to bed.

Night all xx

Original poster
YorkshireTeaDrinker · 07/03/2010 23:20

HP - just re-read and noticed you and DH were watching OBEM together?! I think you need to be measuring your DH's greenness as well as your own.

In fact, maybe that's what you should do. Guage your relative greenness on a scale of 1 - 10 (or relative colur spectrum) and record it daily. You could then plot trends and see whether greenness or redness is the predominent trend over a fixed period of time.

Whichever is the predominent mood is the one you base you TTC decision on.

OP posts:
Original poster
YorkshireTeaDrinker · 07/03/2010 23:14

Evening all,

Cor, greenness washing all over this thread at the moment. Confused love the account of your friend's wife bonding with new baby in theatre. I think women do have some primeval hard wiring that kicks in with the birth that ensures that you know how to react to your baby once it arrives.

LQ, you do need an appointment with you GP as s/he will need to refer you to the community midwife team. GP will ask when your last period was, work out your due date and tell you to make an appointment with the midwife. First appointment with teh midwife (your "booking appointment") should last about an hour and take place from 8 - 10 weeks. I don't know exactly what they do, cos I haven't done it yet! But I think they take lots of baseline measurements (weight etc) and start filling in your maternity notes.

Confused my Mum was cautiously excited when I told her. Well, I didn't tell her as such, just showed her the positive pregnancy test whilst she was expecting progress in the bathroom (i.e. the state of decoration in the bathroom that DH has been doing up since last year!).

Today I have been catnapping on the sofa, ably assisted by the cat. I am still very tired - I hope that will ease off soon. I have also been looking at baby name threads. I know its far too early, but I couldn't resist. I tend to err on the side of poncey and pretentious when it comes to names, DH definately favours the plain and servicable. I think we are going to have some interesting debates when the time comes...

OP posts:
lizardqueenie · 07/03/2010 22:38

confused sorry i've confused you now! I meant about the BFP. He has been totally supportive about the work stress thing. I posted a Q about this under the pregnancy section on talk - some people kind of said that i didnt need to see the doc just book in with a midwife - but reckon that in our area you need to see the gp first.

lol!I did wonder - I realise that all you guys are pretty much in the same boat as me - just wondered if there was anything obvious - yes like date of last period - i've remembered now thankfully!

HoneyPetal · 07/03/2010 22:31

Holy crap. DH just sat and watched OBEM with me. Voluntarily. And he laughed at Joy and Fabio bickering but listened closely when Fabio was talking about how much he wanted a family.

(How cute was it when they held the baby up to her and she was smiling and crying at the same time?)

LQ, if you meant telling your doc you have a BFP, you might be asking for advice in the wrong place!!! I guess he will want to known the date of your last period, but that's where I run out of ideas! YTD may help more as she spoke to her doc the day after the positive, if memory serves.

Confused, your friend sounds like a complete star. Well done to both of them.

confuseddoiordonti · 07/03/2010 22:11

Not really sure what you mean, LQ? Are you asking what the GP may ask when you tell him about the BFP or wanting another week off?

lizardqueenie · 07/03/2010 19:54

Ah confused this is a lovely story. brought a lump to my throat too.

I wonder if anyone can advise -I am going to be going back to my GP tomorrow as I have decided to ask to be signed off for another week. Although I am clearly over the moon/ cloud nine with the pregnancy news it doesn't mask the shi*iness of work so I need to get my head around how to deal with stuff there. Must say work haven't been very proactive in finding out how I am or if they can do anything to help so after much soul searching I am going to take this week off too.

Anyway the question I wanted to ask was obviously when i go to see the GP i will say that I have a BFP (i probably wont go into the circumstances of how I found out!) but does anyone know what the GP is likely to ask? What info I will need to be prepared with? Grateful for your ideas ladies

confuseddoiordonti · 07/03/2010 19:20

He said he felt a bit surplus to requirements at the actual birth. His wife said to the surgeon that she wanted 'dad' to be the one who said if it was a boy or girl and he was that overcome by it all - they'd been in for two days with virtually no sleep - that he forgot! The baby was whisked off and cleaned up and he just stood there looking at it all but not actually seeing and then the nurse asked him if he wanted to hold the baby; he said no as she, the baby, looked so delicate and then the baby started to cry LOUDLY so was put on mum's chest and then stopped as soon as she was talked to. It must be weird for the dad's in many ways as they are surplus to requirements in many ways (not that I would not want mine there though) especially when it's in a very manic theatre. He said the staff were so fantastic (some of the same team who helped with the womb scrape when she had a miscarriage about 18 months ago) that he said he wants to write a letter saying so and why. He said he thanked the staff and they seemed quite taken aback, as if it doesn't happen very often. Beautiful baby too, from what I can gather from the pics he send to my phone.

HoneyPetal · 07/03/2010 18:05

Stop, you're killing me!!

It's lovely to hear how happy and proud he is, he must feel magical at the moment. I guess this is when it becomes 'real' for the man.

confuseddoiordonti · 07/03/2010 17:48

I know! But it was the way the dad was telling me which really did it! And he was so in awe of the fact that mum (nearly wrote the actual names then!) was oblivious to the fact that the surgeons were sewing her back up as she was so focused on talking to and comforting the baby.

Oh 'eck, another lump's appeared in my throat!

HoneyPetal · 07/03/2010 17:40

Cripes.

Gorgeous. The baby stopped crying?

confuseddoiordonti · 07/03/2010 17:17

Afternoon all,
Today has been a very gentle day on account of my sore head. I was up till 2am talking to my friend, the dad, who had the baby on Thursday (the induction which resulted in a c-sec.) This also appeared to involve quaffing cider at the same time - ooops! I don't think I have ever heard a man so in awe of his wife, it brought a lump to my throat. He said that the baby was screaming as she was born and they put her on mum's chest - mum started talking to her and the baby instantly stopped and just stared at her. I was so touched by his telling of this that I made him tell me twice! I blame the cider...

So, today as a result of this weeks revelations and my friends new baby I am a cautious shade of green!

HoneyPetal · 07/03/2010 10:16

Morning all,

I'm off out in a minute for a walk around The Countryside. It's flipping freezing here, but at least it's bright, so should be ok.

Had a good night, no wine and only one quick glance in the direction of the tummy. No, I am def not pregnant, and def not TTC, but if something did happen against all the odds, you ladies would be the first to know. Poss even before DH, as I would need some help with that conversation!!!

Hope you all have fun Sundays. Back later.

lizardqueenie · 07/03/2010 09:39

confused i had intentions of staying online last night to see if anyone was around by then I was knackered!

The only people I have told are DH (obviously!), the lady & man who I have been buying the cambridge diet shakes off of and the counsellor that I have been seeing - just because it was important to get my head straight on how I feel about work.

Also the girl in Boots who I bought the 4th PG test off of who tried to advise me that the First response tests were on BOGOF and I said (like a crazy person) "oh yes, i've done 3 of those already today, I'm just checking!"

What's everyones plans for today? We are off to Columbia Rd flower market in East London then we have a massive (19peeps) family meal later for my nan's bday. Would be nice to tell everyone (esp my Grandma & Great Aunt, gosh that makes her a Great Great aunt, she'll love that!) but am determined to zip it until we are further along!

AmandaCooper · 07/03/2010 08:22

LeviStubbsTears thanks for the hello! I'm waiting rather than dithering (I hope!) but I do like dipping in here to see how everyone's getting on with the eternal "should I, shouldn't I?"!

confuseddoiordonti · 06/03/2010 22:33

Come on 8YTD what did your mum say? And LQ* who have you told in RL?!

lizardqueenie · 06/03/2010 21:49

HP thanks - its been a bit of a weird time with the work thing - I've worked in pressured jobs before, been busy, worked late yadda yadda but this is a whole new thing! The counselling has been fantastic, I've been to say the same lady off and on for about 2 years and most recently to talk about the work stuff. I did think about whether the work stress thing has been exaggerated by the fact that I am pregnant although thinking more about it, I know how I feel and ok I might have been a bit more tearful due to hormones or whatever but who knows? I know that work has really taking it out of me over the last 6ish months so its been a bit of a downhill thing rather than something that happened over night. Anyway I would really recommended counselling/ seeing a therapist but it is important to see the right person. I found my lady through a GP's recommendation -not sure where you live but if its anywhere near SE London/Kent and you would like her details happy to send them over to you.

Lol about your DH ovulating! Ask him if his breasts are tender!

YTD thank you - re loosing weight you're completely right and I am just going to eat healthy which i have no doubt will cause me to loose weight as in bad fat as oppose to loosing anything that would be bad for the pregnancy. As much as I would like to be (or would I?) one of those overweight people that doesnt know where all the weight come from I can def see places where I can make cutbucks! Glad to hear your plans are coming together.And yes what did your mum and b.friend say?

confuseddoiordonti · 06/03/2010 21:18

To carry on... no idea how the house viewing went but will find out on Monday. Only one viewing though so early days.

Brilliant news re your house DIY (or not DIY maybe just D-ing) though. Fingers crossed for May! Our house is on now and it's really weird seeing it on-line

confuseddoiordonti · 06/03/2010 21:15

Virginal birth? Surely that's a misnomer!

I love the idea of home birth although that would not be an option for me as diabetic, although, and I am obviously saying this when NOT pregnant, I think as natural as possible is surely better? I don't have as much faith in the medical profession as perhaps I should!

As you're online I'll post this quickly - how did your mum and best friend react?!