To TTC or not to TTC, that is one of the many questions...

hello all

What a lot to catch up on!

LST good news about your eggs! Sending you lots of positive vibes it all goes well and good luck with your testing, keeping everything crossed for you.

confused & seagreen how are you doing ma' dears? confused your friend sounds like he could teach us all some lessons about enjoying & making the most of life.

HP hope your doing well and feeling better now?

YTD good to hear that all is well with you and the wee one but a bit sad for you that the whole thing wasn't as moving as one might hope. A bit difficult like you say with so much else going on at home.

Actually I must confess that I did know that you had your scan the day after mine, I had mine last Wed but I didn't want to post on here what had happened as DH and I had a pretty rough time. Will post the story but just so you know its a happy ending so far.

So we went to kings hospital to have the scan last wed, saw 2 very nice doctors (one who was a lot like Dr Nick from the Simpsons if you watch it, but thank goodnesss had much better medical knowlege than dr nick)

The scan was fantastic and I was really overwhelmed, not least but the fact that the small monkey did not stop moving around (the doctors were challenged in doing their measurements) and said that we would have our hands full with this one. At Kings they offer you combined screening so the scan plus a blood test. The scan showed that everything was fine - all of the "markers" that they use to detect possible Down's were fine. however my blood test wasnt so good, one hormone being really high and the other low. Long and short, despite being 28 my chance of having a baby with Downs or another chromosomal abnormality was reduced to 1:29. So we decided to have the CVS test where they take fluid from the placenta by inserting a needle into your tummy. Luckily we got the prelim results back the next day, which was amazing considering we thought it was going to take 5 days, particularly given the long weekend. The prelim results have ruled out Downs, Edwards and cystic fybrosis. They still continue developing the tests for another two weeks but that would be for something rare. So we are hugely relieved that after a pretty rough time things seem to be ok. However I did have concerns that YTD might be going through something similar or that if she did have to have the test, me saying how painful it was wouldnt really help her. Phew!

Sorry I know I've probably not caught up with everyones news, I've tried to keep up to date, but hope that you are all doing well.

LQ x

ok- have been scanning through very quickly so sorry if i miss out anything- will be re-reading it tomrrow when am more awake!
LST that's marvellous- i am wishing and hoping for those two blastocysts to burrow in and start the work of living!!
YTD - that's great news! i just saw the picture and that is a bonafide baby inside you! brilliant! well done!

i was thinking about it today and i realise i am fairly green most of the time. yet the reason i hang around this board rather than one of the boards that might be more suited in terms of subject matter is that there's so much comfort in familiarity!
not to mention that the thread keeps my green balloon moored firmly to earth before it carries me away with it!

popping in to say haven't read the thread above but will do that tomorrow! anyone else online readng up on election results as they unfold??

Very pleased to see YTD back with us and good to hear that you have, as expected, an incredibly small child floating around inside your abdomen. I have to admit I was starting to worry where you had got to. Baby YTD looks very relaxed lounging about in there!

Do you think this has made it all seem real to Mr YTD? A lot of people say that their partners just don't really get that there's actually going to be a baby, until the scan.

LST thanks for the detailed account of the egg transfer. I've got everything crossed for those two little embryos.

Great to hear from all. Esp YTD!

Tricky now as DH here. Maybe tomorrow?

Phew! Good to hear all is well, YTD, can't wait to hear about the scan!

I'm going to go to bed, have a horrible headache. Urgh.

Glad to hear all is well YTD! Any news from lq? She nust have had her 12 week scan too, right?

LST - excellent news from you as well! It must be almost impossible for you to think about anything other than those two little bundles of cells right now - it would drive me crazy I know it's a bit glib of me to say, and far too early to worry, but I think twins would be a great result! But maybe I've just always had twins and positive twin experiences all around for all of my life!? (Am not a twin but have lots in family and friends, including someone pregnant with her second pair!)

So glad to hear that it sounds like S is living life to the very fullest - and then some, confused. Long may this continue

Thanks both - also on illicit work post so can't loiter!

Flying through, standard illicit work post!!

LST amazing news on the two chucky eggs!! Even taking it one step at a time, after the initial concern it all seems to have gone really well, yay!! And now you are on the 2WW (tee hee, some MN code for us all there...). Keeping it all crossed for you and the twins baby-eggs.

Confused - that you were feeling . Its in times like this that you see the lovely golden core of the people who are around us and that we love. The party sounds like its going to be a blast, Im all for anything that needs a four page pdf to describe it!

Back later this evening.

PS: No YTD?

I don't think it's ridiculous at all - many people would have let the diabetes get to them in a big way, and you've done fantastic things without it hindering you. It is about state of mind as much as anything. (Easy for me to say, mind you, as never had anything much to deal with myself.) It really helped my friend's husband, and all of us, to think about it as that she'd sort of led her life speeded up - done far more in her 34 years than most people do in their entire lifetime. It would have felt a lot harder, somehow, if she hadn't had such a rich life, and made the most of every moment. Not that it made it any better (and I have to confess to a few uncharitable (and unethical) thoughts about why did it have to be her rather than someone who never shifts from their living room and seems determined to be grumpy and make other people's lives a misery...). But it helped those around her, I think, that she'd had the chance to do so much.

Fantastic that S isn't feeling ill now - that must help enormously (though be a bit weird for him in some ways, I imagine). But so good he can enjoy this time. You take care of yourself, too - these situations really take it out of you.

Yep, will test in two weeks - eek!

Bless you, LST. Your friend sounds as amazing as mine. Perhaps in some ways it is easier for the people who have the cancer to deal with than the people who love the person who has it. In some ways anyway. This might sound a ridiculous comparison but it's the closest I can relate to it. I have been on injections etc since I was 4 as I am diabetic. I have had lots of people say 'poor you' or go on about how they 'couldn't cope' with doing injections etc. But, you know what, I could have either got upset about it and seen it as a disability or I could have done what I did - get on with my life and not let it get in the way. This seems to be what S and your friend are doing, making the most of what they've got left instead of moping about it. Also, lastly, I have to say that the majority of the time S seems to be taking it all in his stride. (I think it was harder before he was on the chemo in some ways as he felt ill then, whereas now as it's doing it's thing he's not in pain or anything.)

Your IVFing does sound quite low tech, I agree! I guess all the high tech stuff goes on before they are, ahem, implanted. What happens now? I am guessing it's just a wait to see if they develop, no? Would it be two or three weeks time when you take a pregnancy test?

You take it uber easy young lady, and make sure that Mr LST is at your beck and call!

ps not surprised you were awake at 2am in a panic about twins! It would be one extreme to the other!

Oh, on the transfer thing - it's not much different from a smear in terms of the experience. It happens in an operating theatre, but you're awake with no pain relief. They (if you want the details!) use a speculum, one of those mediaeval-looking metal things they still use (I think) for smear tests, to sort of crank you open, which is quite painful (I guess they have to, ahem, create a wider aperture...) but after that it doesn't hurt at all. Then an embryologist comes in from another room with a big thin syringe-like thing containing the embryos in fluid, and that's put into you. You're supposed to be able to watch it on a screen but I couldn't really see it very clearly - the whole thing was a bit of a blur, to be honest. The worst thing was being left up in the stirrup things for what felt like a while with my, er, business end hoisted up and exposed for all to see - it's under a sheet but still hoisted up and visible from one side of the room to everyone... All very easy though, basically - whole thing took about 10 mins and was mostly painless. And relatively low tech, though they are obviously watching what they're doing on a screen (it did seem rather a small screen for the purpose, but I suppose they know what they're doing!). The doc who did it was a rather silent bloke, but probably better than a chatty one... (Sorry, you didn't need that level of detail - but you did ask!)

Glad the news perked you up a bit - hope you're feeling a bit better now. Big internet hug.

Oh, confused, you poor thing - can just imagine you're in pieces over that. But it is amazing, and lovely. When my best friend (silly concept but it was so true in this case) was in a similar position she was similarly amazing, and dealt with it all in such an extraordinary way - it's so comforting that they don't give up (though being down and dealing with things quietly is obviously a perfectly valid and natural reaction too). But somehow that my friend J stayed herself (trying to achieve the impossible and see her legion friends and make ludicrous road trips and TRAVEL - go skiing and on a holiday in Dubai in her last year) was of great comfort. Good for him.

Now welling up myself - am definitely in a hormonal maelstrom this week, and have to confess to waking up in a panic about twins (WAY too early in the process!!) at 2am... I think you may see some first-rate dithering from me (very inappropriately) from now on. But yes, much too early and will try to put that out of my mind. It IS good news - just going from quality and real ditherer to this prospect in one go is a bit of a shock!

Great news LST - am keeping it all crossed as always!

Am wary of what I say next yet as it's all so early and uncertain - rambling on about the prospect of twins doesn't seem quite right yet. Hence, this may be a short response but it's only as I don't know what to say further at this early stage.

However, am very pleased to hear your DH is out the dog house!

How do they transfer them, if that's not a stupid question? And are you wide awake? Am pretty clueless about the whole IVF process (as you can probably tell) and would rather ask you, if you don't mind, than logging onto a very detailed website on the matter.

LST you have perked me up. I got an invite today for S's 50th birthday party. He doesn't do things by halves! The invite is a 4 page PDF detailing what's planned - sit down dinners, Brixton's Got Talent, Chuckhead Cider tent, child minders, hog roasts, Brixton Olympics and so ON - along with a strict instruction for NO presents. Instead he's going to have a bucket for donations for cancer charities instead.

Fuck, I'm in tears again.

He is being so effing amazing.

Going for stiff drink and then will re-read your post for a happy anti-dote!

(Sorry if I put the gloom out)

(Bet you're glad it wasn't a LONG update!

Just a quick update, peeps. TWO (count 'em) embryos "transferred" today. (If the scientists - or anyone else - want to know, they were three and four grade blastocysts, i.e. have differentiated cells for placenta and foetus - apologies to anyone that didn't want to know that, and finds the whole thing yucky beyond belief.)

I was extremely thrown by the fact that there were two, and now am panicking about twins almost as much as worrying about it not working at all. They weren't as advanced as they could have been (stage 5) so that was perhaps why they did two, but I'm hoping it's no reflection on their quality (as the clinic said they were very good quality) but just my ancient age. I am also feeling a bit stupid as I must have signed something at some point saying 'one OR two - at the discretion of the embryologist', (and do vaguely remember this) but obviously didn't register that it might actually be two as they'd shoved the Single Embryo Transfer policy down my throat so much. (That will teach me to read the small print... gulp.)

Anyway, we'll cross that bridge if we come to it, and DH seems amazingly sanguine about the prospect of twins (probably on the grounds that it's not his body being utterly wrecked, and he can go to work/ on business trips to get away from them...) - but better than the alternative.

Right am going to attempt to talk about other things, tra la la la la, nothing at all happening (or failing to happen) in the next two weeks, no sirree. Etc.

Really really hope things are ok for YTD (and lq for that matter). You have gone awfully quiet. We're all behind you, whatever's going on, and would love to hear from you if and when that feels appropriate/helpful. Hope I haven't been tactless in any way going on about all this stuff.

Hope everyone else is ok - well done on the report, hp and the exemplary cycle! Hope things are back to normal on the house front, confused and with DH (if they ever weren't). I've had a few ups and downs with my dear H over the last few days, perhaps unsurprisingly, but he's creeping back into the good books (or at least out of the doghouse!).

Well done.

Hmmm, YTD, where are you?!

So, today is blastothingy day for LST isn't it? Will run around woods naked with the dog hugging trees and things to encourage growing (how this will encourage growing I am not entirely sure, but bear with me.)

drum roll....

da da da da da da daaaaaaaaaa!

I have finished my report!! Whippee. Stupid 'Personal Development' courses and their excessive levels of homework. But, tis done. Ahhhhh.

Still no sign of YTD I see

Also, have been willing on the development of LST chucky eggs, in the style of mad evil scientist...imagine lab coat, crazy hair, arms aloft, lightning arcing and smoke billowing...grow, grow!!!

Had some good news today...coming off the pill may have helped my other ishoo (not bottom pain), so am quite chuffed!

Also, I haven't mentioned HP boring cycle news for a good while, but just completed Cycle 2, and....ovulated on Day 14, 14 day luteal phase and 28 day length. Which I think is pretty darn good (and swotty?) after 16 years on the pill Only worry is the extra bleeding but will discuss with doc when go back. So, am very pleased, all things considered.

Night. And thanks x

I'd better scarper, its getting on and DH is making 'lets start feeding the cats before going to bed' noises.

Yay, another day off tomorrow!

Night. x

I agree! He knows Im reading, but not so much posting!

Ahhh, that might explain the quietness.

Not exactly, but think she may have been away for the weekend so will hopefully post soon.

I did similar with my DH re MN. I want to mention things about it to him but not to the extent where he'd be curious enough to see.

I just casually dropped into the conversation odd snippets of info, and referenced MN as my source. He is gently teasing me about the broody thing, so its a way of keeping the discussion open and relaxed (as relaxed as I can be, anyway).

Ooo, have you sighted her at all??