Waiting to TTC part 2!

Think we have come to the decision that I will have treatment for the MS for 6months & then stop to TTC later this year. Means I'll be hanging around on here moping & feeling broody for a bit longer!

Totally understand the budget living! When DD was conceived it was just as things economically went tits up! By the time she was born things were starting to get pretty tough. DH waorks in the finacial sector, mortgages and such, and things have been pretty awful for the last year. There is light at the end of the tunnel now, but it's always just out of reach. Financially having another baby now would be tricky, but medically it's what makes the most sense for me long term. For us it isn't so much paying off debts completely it's just getting them back to being manageable again!

Amanda - we got given loads and loads of stuff. I would say DD cost us hardly anything for the first 6-9months. Only when she started walking & eating 'proper food' did the costs start building up a bit. But actually I hardly ever buy her clothes, she gets given so many, she has more than DH & I together. She is very little though so doesn't seem to get through them that quickly! She is 18months this week & still mostly in 9-12month clothes! We bought most of the 'big' things gradually when I was PG so it didn't actually seem like a big expense IYSWIM! As for social life, it's not the same as it was before, but it's still pretty good. Friends of ours have kids or are starting to settle & often we just go out earlier or have people round at our house. In fact often I will go out at the start of an evening with DD then leave DH to it & he comes home later. I really don't mind, and I know he would do the same if I wanted to stay out. Things are different but still pretty good, it's all about compromise really.

That is the path that makes most sense yes! But other factors are an issue about TTC, mostly financial!

What are your plans for TTC? Have you made any decisions about when you might be able to start? Or are you hanging around waiting for your DH to give you the green light? Isn't it horrid when they are right & you don't want them to be?!

If I have one of the treatments on offer (less effective one) I need to be on it at least 9-12months to see any real benefits. But I have to have 3 months without it before I can start TTC. The other, more effective treatment, they won't let me have if I want to have more children. It is so new they don't know what would happen if I had it & stopped to become PG! Trouble is I feel the best I have felt since DD was born. Have loads of energy & practically no symptoms at all! The treatments are not nice & come with a whole heap of horrid side effects which do not appeal in the slightest! On the one hand medical advice is I should start treatment asap BUT if I want another baby I should also think about that sooner rather than later! It's not really a medical reason holding me back IYSWIM. From that point of view I can have kids no problem, it's more a home situation that makes it tricky! The risk of relapse after PG is high compared to the risk when you are PG, so DH is worried how I could cope with a relapse & a newborn & a toddler. Which is valid. BUT DD could start preschool in Feb next year (I would rather wait til Sept if poss tho) & that would make things alot easier. I just think ultimately DH is using my illness as a good excuse to put off TTC!

Isis Oh dear, poor you! Lots of making up to do & rebuilding of trust then! We all make silly mistakes some times!

Macaco - funny how they act up and it makes you think twice! Then they do something insanely cute & you go all gooey & want 20 more of them!

Amanda - I have MS & they have just decided it is more active than they thought & want me to start drug treatments. Treatments are a no-no with PG & I want another DC before I start any medication (My DD is nearly 18months). DH isn't keen now as he had to look after me & a 3month old & work full time when I had my first relapse. So it's a tough call really. Plus DH is self-employed & business is struggling (but slowly improving as recession eases) so he has that to worry about too! It's all a bit tricky & there are more ins & outs than that...but that is it in a nutshell! MS would not have any bearing at all on a pregnancy it is just post-natal it can have implications. But there are no certanties with it & I could be absolutely fine! Very much a 'six of one' sort of situation. DH has in the past said he wanted 5 DC! I was always more reluctant but now it is completely the other way round! It is seeming to me that DH is using my illness as an excuse now. I am the one who has to deal with it after all, & I feel that I could cope with another child. He remains to be convinced! This all after he had said at xmas that we could 100% TTC in June...we shook hands and everything!

pestering doesn't work here! Just seems to make DH cross & short tempered. I am finding quiet & forlorn dotted with a helping of wailing & tears seems to be working...or at least wearing him down!

Amanda - I think my DH has the FOF...and we already have a DD! Maybe it's just fear of more than one in his case!
(Thread has moved slow at times, but has picked up lately!)