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30s TTC - More Gin Than George BESH

1001 replies

Scorpette · 22/11/2009 12:43

Come on in ladies, the bar is fully stocked with Advocaat, Bailey's and novelty Xmas drinkies and the slaves are wearing Ann Summer 'Santa's Hat' posing pouches. Have also festooned the place with plenty of festive tat and lots of v un-eco and tacky Xmas lights and shit because I know we all love getting Xmassy dead early. There's a fireplace so you can send your wish list to Santa up the chimbley, platters of wooden spoons and coconuts on the mantlepiece and 'Mulled Wine' scented candles lighting up The Pit of Despair. Make yourselves at home!

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Scorpette · 17/12/2009 00:34

Poor Polly I am firmly of the opinion that these women don't really want children at all, they just want to mock BESHes like us. How to offer solace? Saying you can at least eat and drink all you like at Xmas is a poor substitute for being updiffed and not really helpful. Would it help if I wear a Santa's hat whilst I bitchslap you into blissful unconsciousness? I do it purely out of love

As of tomorrow I will be gusset-checking like a menkul - Pink Panther arrived at this v early stage of DPO last month so am paranoid this month. Only 6DPO before you have to accept defeat? Worra swiz! Have already thought I had the teeniest bit of peachy colour down there earlier but if anything, was due to me injuring my Jemima Puddleduck by repeatedly shoving toilet paper up there like There wasn't anything really. PLEASE let it continue like this - do not want to be a hysterical sobbing, screeching, depressed loon like last babyfail seeing as I'll be vvv low for a funtime Xmas at ILs and need to vaguely resemble a sane human being (I know, I know).

PS I know what Gavin and Stacy's fertility problem is. And I certainly didn't get this info from the Heat Xmas special

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PollyPoo · 17/12/2009 00:04

Waaaahh.... where is everyone when i need hairstroking violence and alcohol? Must I get pissed on my own? Again?

PollyPoo · 16/12/2009 23:26

Right, who has the keys for the pit? Open it now please, I'm coming in. If you don't open it I will just throw myself at the door repeatedly until it opens. As predicted, droid arrived during middle of my shift this evening, along with news that one of my most darling friends is most likely diffed (first month of trying... and she is same age as me - 38). Hence I cried all the way home from work and have just cracked open the vodka, cider, kettle chips and houmous. Can't decide what to have first...

Gin please to stop bleeding? I cannot take any more bad news... I am blubbering wreck as it is. Have sent you msg on t'other place.

Right, I need to get pissed. Who's with me? I'm feeling .. what is it Igs? Tasty? Like I want to punch something. Getting pissed is better alternative than violence I think.

Scorpette · 16/12/2009 22:28

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CUNextTuesday · 16/12/2009 22:16

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Scorpette · 16/12/2009 21:52
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CUNextTuesday · 16/12/2009 20:58

gin go and watch the Royal Veriety performance - the sheer awfulness will enable you to forget your current woes. Remember our old friend implantation bleeding? Well then. Don't make me give you a good talking to...

CUNextTuesday · 16/12/2009 20:56
Scorpette · 16/12/2009 20:47

Yeah, but Gin, if she hits you with the fish then you've got summat to blame the B.O. on...

PS Love ya too, Honeybunch. Wow, there's a lot of dust in the air. Really affecting my eyes, so it is

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ginhag · 16/12/2009 20:38

Ta tous les beshes. All seems to have stopped at the mo,so am gonna try n get an early night n hope for the best.

scorps you just made me cry erm,you were nice n that,n I seem to have got a bit of dust in me eyes ain't I?

My brain has gone haywire,tis full of crap.

And STOP HITTING ME WITH THAT FUCKING FISH!!!

HawaiianCuntShine · 16/12/2009 20:27

awwww - t'anks!

Fish violence coming your way... Curly and Gin

Scorpette · 16/12/2009 19:15

PS Welcome back Cuntshine - I thought I could smell fish

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Scorpette · 16/12/2009 19:14

Gin, don't panic - 'rots has had a bit of bleeding recently, ain't that right, 'rots? But I know you will panic - even without the previous wk 12 shiteness, anyone would panic. I'd be a jibbering loon in a corner by now But try and remember that it isn't game over yet, not by a long shot. You know we are all here for you and hoping (and certain amongst us will be praying), that everything will be FINE.

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CurlyCasper · 16/12/2009 18:53

x-refing FB comments here, but iggy you is in fancy London. I am in the Countryside. It's the biggest place outside London, innit, but being in the stix you don't get fancy fish 'n' shiz. I stick with tuna and trout...

skihorse · 16/12/2009 18:48

gin Hang on in there, lock mani away so you can't hurt him. Get hubby home and get to an EPU.

cuntshine You do realise that it's snowing ALL over europe as we type right? Get her and her tropical beaches & cocktails.

Curly I think an online virtual party is a brilliant idea! Especially for those of us who can't drink, have no energy, wear trackie bottoms with loose elastic and have to be in bed by 9pm!

CurlyCasper · 16/12/2009 18:46

sorry poo and thanks. More gin? You'll have to pour your own so I don't wretch.

Blither away gin. and be positive! Easier said than done, I know. So we'll do it for you if necessary.

cuntshine nice to have some cross Atlantic action back on the thread. well done iggy you drew them back in. bessie cheggs Good to have you back too. Has kim been by here? who else is missing? we need everyone here for the BESH Christmas party!!!! (please to have it when my tum tum feels better? Then again, maybe I'll just have a virtual stomach of iron for the purpose)

iggypiggy · 16/12/2009 18:45

cuntshine bring on the tuna BESH

iggypiggy · 16/12/2009 18:45

Ah gin I hope I did not makes you worse. Is so likely to be fine - honist xxxx

HawaiianCuntShine · 16/12/2009 18:37

iggy I was just waiting for the green light - set these 10 aside for just you. You do like yellowfin tuna, right? Fresh caught off the coast of Maui.

ginhag · 16/12/2009 18:37

Thanks. Am properly bricking it now. And I just shouted at mani. Hope mr gin home soon...

iggypiggy · 16/12/2009 18:36

well - it can go either way can't it. Cos cramps is normal - bit of bleeding is fine... but I don't wanna be patronizing cow.. cos agree it could be bad too.

Plus I don't think red blood nescessarily bad - my mc started with brown.. but then again - clearly sometimes is bad.

Sorry not helpful - but have a smooch from me and will keep everything crossed that is just nothing xx

ginhag · 16/12/2009 18:32

Blood and cramps though,that ain't good is it?

iggypiggy · 16/12/2009 18:31

gin I am the same everytime I say I think my symptoms are going - someone will say they come and go and it is normal... whatever - neither of us will relax until we see heartbeats on screens... head in sand is good - I recommend it.

ginhag · 16/12/2009 18:19

iggs I got blood just now when went to loo. Hardly any (so far) but it's red. Shit shit. Knew I shouldn't have fucking started hoping. And I know people will say stuff about it being ok but sorry I not sure I'll believe it

iggypiggy · 16/12/2009 18:16

virginiahag you is back back!!!!

Excellent news about diffedment obv.

Join me in a small annexe of the pit of despair where we hide until someone tells us 12 weeks is up and the babyee is still there.

cuntshine can I get some frozen fish action?

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