Anyone out there who's recently MCd and back to TTC without waiting?

littleonemum so sorry - i was exactly where you are now one week ago, my mc was last monday, its such a horrible feeling.

this is a really good place to find support and everyone here knows how you feel.

{{{{{ big hugs}}}}}

Hi there

Just m/c ed on Monday so this thread has been a beacon of light today. Thank you for all the positive stories. And I am definitely trying again soon!

Meita think your dh is very normal - mine is quietly oblivios to any of the emotions I am feeling as to him the preganancy was so early it was not really real - h hadn't thought through the fact I was pregnant, and what that would mean - we hadn't even talked about the due date so to him it wasn't a big event because he is in the - well we will just try again and next time it will be fine - he doesn't count the days, worry about the 2ww, or mind so much when it happens so to him there is no pressure, no impatience and he struggles to understand mine so i just don't talk about it with him. I talk about it with you guys! You are the only people who can really relate to how I am feeling so thats the support for me.

tfls i have been struggling with the same whats my next milestone - and have focussed on diet and excercise as being good things I can do to get my body healthy and in shape and to lose a few more pounds before I pile them on again - I have also started wearing all my smallest clothes and bought a really fitted dress last week which I am wearing today which is my own effort to 'invoke sods law' that being that I won't fit in it for long (its not the wrap dress for the wedding). It is frustrating but I was driving myself nuts and at least this way I feel good because I look good and I know I won't look like this for long (I hope) and then it should be a long time until I am back in this sort of shape - took me 2 years with ds

keep chugging along ladies - it might be just round the next corner or somewhere on the horizon but its there ....

Hi chamois, welcome on this our little "hopeful impatience" thread!

tfls well I'm about a week further along than you, MC was 3.5 weeks ago. I remember that last week I felt a bit winded, not in shape, unfit... but not really exhausted or anything, not physically. Now it's much the same, just with a bit of improvement - so, not totally fit and energetic, but not too bad at all. But then, my MC was very early, no medical treatment involved, so that might make it easier and quicker to recover from?

Re diet - you know you shouldn't diet when pg? Because, when you diet, your body releases toxins into the blood which were so far stored with all the fat, i.e. if you do get rid of any of that excess fat, you at the same time will be saddling yourself with free-flowing toxins - not good for little bean! Reason why I'm saying this is: If you focus on your diet NOW with the firm decision to stop dieting as soon as you get that BFP - now wouldn't that be an excellent, quite immediate reward? Good enough for me, anyway!

Grapefruit Juice etc.: What I'll try next cycle is raspberry leaf tea (infusion) for pre-ovulation, and lady's mantle for post-ovulation. Raspberry leaf is good for supporting ovulation, lady's mantle is good for LH. I was drinking "women's balance" by Yogi Teas, which also contains Raspberry leaf, last cycle when I got pg. Sure it can't hurt, and have hopes that it might help!

Today I'm struggling a bit, grief for the lost pregnancy and baby is still around and more up front right now, as there is nothing immediate I can do to distract me from it, apart from waiting... And there seems to be no-one around me who I can really talk to. DP has a very important deadline coming up in two weeks, and has asked me to take charge of stuff (like household chores etc.) so that he can concentrate on that deadline - but I feel like right now I'd like him to be there for me, rather than the other way round. I have some (minor) deadlines looming myself and it all just seems a bit too much sometimes. There are moments when I feel I'd just like to crash and fall to pieces and be held - but I guess I have to postpone that for now. Perhaps that's why I dread the anticipated BFN or AF that will probably show up in about 10 days. 'Cause that's when I just won't be able to keep up the pretense anymore. :-(

How are your DPs/DHs dealing with all this? Mine seems rather un-impressed.

On the positive side, there might - just maybe - be a little embryo implanting in my uterus right now. Who knows? There is always hope.

Hi everyone and great to see you again chamois . Stopping bleeding was a big milestone for me - such a relief to get rid of the daily reminder.

Good news re the BFN meita. Feels a bit funny writing that!. But like you I've read several threads where people have got a BFP soon after m/c and don't know whether it's good news or residual hormones.

Curious question - how is everyone feeling physically? I still seem to be a bit run down and just wondered if my body was still recovering (m/c was 2.5 weeks ago). Also I'm sticking to my diet but not loosing any weight at the moment - need to up the exercise but it's another frustration. I'm not good at being virtuous without the immediate reward

I know you ladies will understand but the bit I'm struggling with now is the lack of any immediate milestone. I'm hoping I will ovulate soon (would normally have done so by now) but there doesn't seem much else I can do at the moment to drive things forward. Have researched for England, drinking gratefruit juice like its going out of fashion, charting every day and doing OVK test every day. OK I'm very sad and impatient and it might not be wise to give me any more ideas!

Ha, I meant 'hop on' this thread but I guess there is a lot of hoping going on here too...

Hello, can I hope on this thread as well please?!
Had a medically managed miscarriage a week ago at 11 weeks, have finally stopped bleeding which feels like a big milestone. Now I'd just like a BFN so we can get going again.
Patience not my greatest virtue so although it's awful that we are on this thread at all it's good to have found you all here, just as impatient as I am!

Good morning ladies,

I hope you are all well, and welcome MintChoc! Sorry that you had to go through all that. In a way I'm finding the waiting for my body to sort itself out to be one of the more stressful parts of the whole MC-experience. It's like, after the shock and the grief and the time when everything was just terrible, you find yourself picking yourself up again, looking forward... and then you encounter the big "wait" sign. Totally with you, regarding impatience!

Sod's law - hmmm should have bought that OPK yesterday! But stayed rational and decided there would still be plenty of time once AF arrives, and if she doesn't, well then I won't need it, will I?

What I did buy was a couple of HPTs, just to have them handy. Then I remembered that some of you have tested or will test at about 2 weeks after the MC, to make sure the hormones are back to normal and such. So, why not I thought, can't hurt, and used one of them right then and there. Happy to report that it's indeed BFN. Now I can be reassured that IF I get a BFP end of next week, if AF doesn't arrive until then, that it is not a residue of the previous pg that's showing up.

waves

Waves back at TFLS - Hi again. Spotted you and a couple of other familiar names on here so decided to hop on. Hope you're doing well. Great to catch up again on a more hopeful thread, and thanks for the lovely welcome.

I'm going to repeat every night -
I will be patient
I will be patient
I will be patient etc, etc, etc

Maybe

Sorry about the second post but I can't multi task.

BLP - love the sod's law theory. I'm hoping you have a very sober wedding (in the nicest possible way!)

Love your DD's style monkeys. Did that mean you got a lie in - ever hopeful!

waves excitedly at mintchoc - we said we'd met again (humms the tune under her breath) on a TTC thread!

You're in excellent company here when it comes to impatience . You might even end up looking like a paragon of virtue compared to some of us!

Glad you've got the ERPC out of the way. Hope you're feeling OK - take it easy.

Hi All,
Recognise some names from miscarriage threads over the past few weeks

Can I pop in and say hello here too?

Finally had ERPC yesterday at 11+5 after finding out 3 weeks ago that it was anembryonic pregnancy. Feeling OK. Bit crampy but other that that fine.

Realise that it may take some time to ovulate but going to wait for a -ve test and then get things going again! Hopefully the hormones will reduce quickly as keen to TTC as soon as possible.

Anyway probably still a bit early for me to be thinking too far ahead I suppose, but then I've never been the most patient of people .

Looking forward to chatting to you all and hopefully everyone will get happy news soon.

hello everyone! how you all doing?

meita i've just had my hair cut off too and i love it. makes my head feel so much lighter!! glad you're liking your new style!

BLP i would probably have chosen option c but option b will give you more peace of mind. option d made me chuckle. do you live near cambridge? i do..........

cheepz glad you've had a better day at work today. must admit today i'm feeling more normal than i have for a while which is good. seems like we're all managing to get our heads straigt again!

well it was dd's actual birthday yesterday. i'd wrapped up a couple of presents the night before and stupidly left them in living room. she went downstairs before either of us and promptly opened them, bringing them up to us once she'd got the paper off!! it did make us laugh. we didn't do much really. had a friend come over and he and dh took dd for a bike ride while i did some work. otherwise just chilled out really. been in work today, dd just gone to sleep so off for a long hot bath then planning to get my fix of holby city! simple pleasures!

'trying to invoke sods law' - love it!!!!!! gave me a chuckle at my desk - thanks

Morning. Thanks for your help, test on Saturday (if needed) it is. Meita, you're right, c wasn't really an option, I blamed myself for this miscarriage and I'd followed all the advice even when, scientifically speaking, I didn't see a valid reason for it.

Any normal night out and me not drinking wouldn't be at all unusual, it's just the fact it's a wedding, leaving the wine untouched and not drinking the champagne for the toast will be noticed, though to be honest, if I have cause not to drink I may well be too happy to care (obviously before the neuroticism sets in properly!) Will buy a new test in Cambridge tomorrow just in case it's needed, bought a box of tampons in tesco last night, hoping to invoke sod's law!

Thanks for stopping me dithering, have a good day.

Thanks everyone for your input re: temping.

TFLS usually I would be tracking CM as well as temperatures, but this time I just didn't have the heart for it - had a hard time keeping up on the temp side as it was. Yes, sometimes it's hard, simply to be patient with ourselves, isn't it!

BLP yeah, and tbh I know I have made similar blunders in the past. At that moment, I probably would have been upset with just about anything anyone could have said - so I'm not too angry at what people say or don't say. As long as I get the impression that they do, in fact, mean well.

Cheepz wow I'm imagining you with a HOT outfit! Myself, I had my hair cut - from quite long to rather very short... I needed the change! When I walked out from the hairdressers I felt very frail... didn't know if I liked the outcome... but now I feel liberated. So, not too bad overall.

g'night everyone!

I would also go a) but then I rarely drink so no one would ask any questions

If I drank a little then would go with TFLS and c)

Better day at work today - still poor concentration but I am making progress and i felt knockout in my new outfit which makes a change from being dowdy mum most days!

I'd go for b) too - on the day when AF is due, good tests should be 99% accurate. Assuming your cycle is not too much off, it should be fairly correct.

I wouldn't do c) cause IF I'd later MC again, I'd be so sure that was the cause...

a) might be an option if it were me, as I drink little anyway and often not at all - so, easy to explain. I for one would prefer to err on the side of caution - but then, that's me!

and as to d), well tfls answered that one!

Definitely not d - what would happen to MN!

Personally I'd go for b.

Fingers crossed for the w/e for you.

Hopefully the crying at Deal or No Deal is an early sympton of pregnancy. If not I'd put it down to a bad case of TTC stress!

Hello all,

apples How frustrating! I'd echo what thefatladyscreams says and give GP/EPU a quick ring, in all probability they'll tell you to wait another week and test again, but it may put your mind at rest that it's totally normal since the further along you were the longer it takes the HCG to drop, fingers crossed for you.

meita I had the "well at least you know it's possible" from quite a few people (everyone at school knew because the head made me take a week off when slap cheek was going round)I think people just feel the need to say something and don't always get it quite right! Re: temping, I think it can take a little while for hormones to rebalance etc, but perfectly possible to slip back into normal patterns, my first cycle post MC was about 7-10 days out, I think (as I said, I'm rubbish at remembering to temp) but this one seems fairly normal.

katster37 - thanks for cheering me up

I have a quick question - assuming my cycles have gone back to normal, and it seems like this one has, AF is due on Saturday. A uni friend is getting married on Saturday, do I

a) not drink "just in case"

b) test on Sat if no AF, trust the result to be accurate and drink/don't drink as appropriate.

c) stop overthinking things, not test, and just have a few drinks (which will also serve to avoid any "ooh, not drinking, anyting you want to tell us" comments from people who don't know about MC)

d) stop harrassing other people and make my own decisions

Desperately hoping for a BFP because, quite apart from the obvious reasons, it means I can blame hormones for the fact that I was tearing up whilst watching Deal or No Deal

Hope everyone has a good start to the week.

Morning everyone

Lovely to see you here apples . Let's hope we can make this into a positive thread for us all. Not sure what's happening about your positive test. The EPAU tested me one week post m/c and said it was still postitive. I was told to test in another week (2 weeks post m/c) and expect it to be negative (it was) but to call them if it was positive. Maybe your hormones are slow to drop, we're all different and our bodies will respond in different ways - but I'd give your GP or someone a quick call to check to put your mind at rest.

meita - I guess some people just don't know what to say - so say something stupid . It is a grief - and comes up at funny times to remind you. I'll be feeling fine and then something (like an association with a date in the future when I was hoping to be xxmonths pregnant catches me out).

Regarding temping, I've read to count the first day of bleeding as day 1 but not to expect a regular cycle. I guess it all seems very vague. I'm trying temping and OVK to check when I'm ovulating and it hasn't happened yet (it would have in a normal cycle) so I guess we just have to be patient (damn ) until our bodies right themselves. Not sure what to make of the changes in your temps. Did you notice any changes in cervical mucus (sorry TMI ) that might help you calculate?

Glad the party went well monkeys - sounds brilliant but exhausting. Hope you caught up on your sleep!

katster37 - thanks for the positive story. We need these reminders!

Hope everyone has a good week.

Wow, so many positive stories about increased fertility post-miscarriage! Just wanted to add mine, as I had a chemical pregnancy at 4+something in Feb, and got pregnant straight away too. Am now nearly 25 weeks with DC1. Good luck with TTC and really sorry for your losses. I was a wreck after just 4 weeks so I can't imagine going through it at a later stage.
x

not sure what the right answer is but i counted cd1 as first day of mc and am calling it cycle 0 as am expecting it not to be normal in terms of length, when i ovulate etc, the cycle 1 will be post next AF when I would expect things to be more predictable and normal

I haven't ever used temperature as I get such strong ovulation cramps and my cycles are so regular I don't generally need to so can't help you there

apples, so sorry to hear that, I hope it all sorts itself out soon! I'm finding it hard to understand what my body is doing, although compared to you, it's all straight forward. I hope your hormones give you a break soon.

Hello ladies,

I hope you all had a nice weekend!

cheepz thanks for linking me through to here ;-) and who knows, maybe soon we'll link each other through to a new ante-natal club. Sounds like you had a good time away! A long weekend away, at the coast in Dorset (not this but the previous weekend) really did the trick for me too, in the sense of being able to look forward again. Sometimes a woman just needs a break!

I'm sorry I can't reply to everyone - thanks for welcoming me here. It's good to talk to and read of others who are going through something similar.

The reaction I got a lot in other places was "Oh well, look at the bright side, at least now you know that you can conceive. And next time it will work out!"
This I found totally useless... it sort of reduces the MC to a cycle of TTC which didn't work out. Next time... yeah sure. I've had plenty of "next time" thoughts in the last few months, but a MC is not the same! Looking at the bright side, sure, I know I can conceive, but what good is that? In exchange for that "knowledge", now I have thousands of new worries about being able to carry to term... Over all, this comment just doesn't take account of the grief. Yes, with luck there will be another BFP and a baby sometime. But it won't be THIS one. This one has died. And you can't just replace one with another, can you? Sure, I do look forward again now - but at that moment, just after MCing, you need to accept that there is grief, and this grieving needs space and time...

On a completely different note, I've been measuring my base temperature since MCing, and I am a bit confused. Can anyone help me with these questions?

• Some people say, count the first day of MC as first CD. Others say, wait until the bleeding has stopped, then start counting. Any opinions/experiences?
• I am now at CD 23, counting the first day of MC as CD1. Usually I ovulate sometime between CD 17 and 20. You can view it here:

• On the other hand, usually my basic temperatures are much higher! Last cycle, in which I conceived, the pre-ovulation temperatures were around 36.7 and post-ovulation they were around 36.95. Now in this cycle, the pre-ovulation temperatures were around 36.5 and, if indeed ovulation was on or about CD 18, they are at 36.7 post ovulation. Over all, about .2 lower than in the last few cycles. Does anyone have any ideas why this might be so?
• I have a suspicion that the temperatures are so low because I'm not producing enough of the right hormones... anyone know anything about this?

I'm just quite confused and don't really understand what my body is doing, on the one hand it's all so "normal", and on the other hand it's way off! Any kind of re-assurance would be very welcome!

Best,
Meita