Mid 30's TTC--Gin Palace Two: Spawn of the BESH

dontry well done on resisting the urge to say "Hove actually"

No sign of the emergency Preseed yet, but I did receive a card from an 8 week old thanking me for the uber cool gift I bought him. Excellent.

choos - I was talking about YOU when I said I'd accost a stranger! Now I've got to stalk you and dttah? When will we find time for the baby-making?

BTW, if I saw 'a fart-powered midget thing shouting and muttering randomly', I'd just presume I'd caught my reflection in a shop window

I know Brighton pretty well - have wanted to live there for more than 10 years, but circumstances have never been right (yet). TYF has never been, so can't wait to show him all my fave haunts

Signs of Ov? Well, you should start feeling hornier than usual, and feeling a bit or a lot more confident and flirty than usual, you might get a mild period pain style thing on one side or the other (mittelschmerz) and your boobs might get tender and your vulva will probably swell a bit. However, the most important sign is 'egg white' - if your vaginal fluid becomes clear, sticky and stretchy and there's lots of it, then it is time to get shagging! You can test its consistency with your fingers - if you can stretch it, then it's time

Hope I'm not telling you stuff you don't already know

I was a Vegan for a while, but I just can't resist a good sausage (make of that what you will).

Saw that Paris Gordon R episode. Why do people like that get such nice Dads

Was supposed to go out tonight but feel like I will never want to go out again. Whats the point without wine anyway

I'm in darkest Hove with the rest of the care in the community and wind-bag geriatric folks

If you see a fart-powered midget thing shouting and muttering randomly - tis me!

Went to Heather Mac's vegan place yesterday -full o' wankahs, including the lady herself (or someone the spit of her with short hair).

sitting dunno sorry. Only suggestion is temp so you know when you ov? Altho' therein lie madness me think.

ha! One of my dearest friends from uni went back one weekend after we'd left (me through breakdown, him through breakdown/shame) where upon he managed to impregnate a druggy-anorexic getting back at daddy. Once bambino was born she checked in to rehab, left him, moved to Brighton where she immediately shacked up with a lezzer and enrolled in wimmins studies. Brighton? Stereotypical?

I have toyed with veganism - but my favourite vegetarian thing evah was Gordon Ramsey helping that skag addict Edinburgh chick in Paris (Piccolo Teatro - or something like that) and the unforgettable carrot lasagne.

sitting I hear your sensible question but unfortunately I can't help cos I haven't got that far and have no clue when/if I OV or what a SIC is but I'm sure someone knowledgable will come along soon who isn't too pissed and should shed some light.

There should be some sort of manual - so you know what your getting in to or what to do next its all too wishy washy for me. I think thats why I'm struggling to make a decision. I can't weigh it up properly cos I don't know everything IYKWIM

Scor you are most welcome to sunny Brighton and tbh they are such weird fuckers down here they wouldn't think it was weird for a stranger to say Hi to them. Plus the great think about Brighton is that anything goes - ANYTHING- took me months to stop staring, now am quite fond of said weirdos.

If you want I can give you some Top Tips for drinks and dinner and how to avoid the shit stag/hen/tourists.

Ha, wait till we're all monstrous with child and vile disgusting plastic pasties crocs are the only thing we can get on our blubbery hippo-feet!

Choos - me & TYF are going to Brighton next week for a am ovulating so knock me up or there'll be trouble romantic break next week. If I see a boozy 30-something wearing fabulous footwear as she fondles baby clothes with a worrying look in her eye, I'll say hi, shall I?

Nah, no stalking, I promise.

My rubbish p-t job is being a what I call a Cupcake Monkey - I work for my best mate in her quirky, retro veggie cafe and as well as loads of other delish stuff, we make at least 4 different types of vegan* cupcake everyday. Yesterday's were: lime and courgette (oh yes, a bestseller), lavender, mixed berry, chocolate and strawberry and cranberry and almond. We decorate them really madly. And I can't eat a one of them. Now PhD funding isn't going to happen I really should look for a 'proper' job, but it's such a laugh, even if I make a pittance and am patronised and treated like shit by twats all the time. And am 'not using my potential', whatever that means.

Only 3 of my friends have young DC and one of those is a divorced bloke. Another had her son at 18 and he's a moody, stinky teenage brat (hands off, ski). The rest are under-30s and not worried (the fools!), don't want kids or are past the BOD and bricking it like me. Is it wrong that I have a pic of me snuggling my friend's newborn son on my phone and keep looking at it and squinting so I imagine he looks just like me? (Yes, even though he's a baby boy!)

*They're ridiculously moist and light. Sneer not (I'm not a veggie, BTW).

Quick questions (in a sensible voice)...

Has anybody else had the same problem as me (not OV every month)? Had blood tests done. All vaguely acceptable bar the lazy shy egg scenario. GP has not given me any other leads at this point. I assume thats because my OH now has to SIC to have the little tadpoles assessed. His appointment is still a month away though.

Anybody have a clue what happens next?! Am imagining I should be medicated with an egg teaser of some description, but not sure if I should be camping at the surgery to demand such assistance or waiting forever spunk results.

(sensible chat over)

hallelujah! they are the devils work for sure

Just so long as they are not crocs - the most ugly shoes EVER.

They are a crime against all things shoe like.

Its OK! We aren't related after all!

Well done on having lovely choos. I myself am unable to work a heel these days. I hate to paint the picture that I am a roaring alcoholic (think I may have already done so) BUT I did tear the ligaments all the way round in both ankles from "flying" in heels. I am now limited to flats or kittens, and will probably end up in a supportive manboot by the time I'm 50.

They are awaiting shocking pink icing as we speak (I don't seem to be too good at decorating them). Not as bouncy looking as the ones my mum used to make. Still highly edible though!

Wishing I had bought some strawberry jam and desiccated coconut now. Bloody icing spoils them every time! I never learn!

I'm in sunny Brighton but I'm not a southerner.

Marvelous!!

How did the fairy cakes turn out? Love a bit of cake.

You sound suspiciously like my sister! What country are typing in?

Yup thats me! The gin soaked old prune in the corner with faaabulous shoes but completely unable to make a serious decision and thinking that extending the cleaners contract to 2 months is too big a commitment..

Ah well then! How do you do! You can be my new friend. The RL ones are boring and sober all the time now!

Choos I can't remember... are you the one lurking in the corner not quite SWI yet? I did 6 months of SWNI and then started to wonder how I hadn't inadvertently got knocked up (being of a nation of people who are supposed to breed like rabbits). Thats when I started SWI - when I was forced into it. Enjoy your procrastination my love, its a far better friend than you think!

I feel your pain sitting I'm the last in my group of friends and MrC is also the last within his group and is siblings to spog.

So no pressure...

Just spoke to another good friend. She has three weeks to go 'til the baby comes out. I will probably have another meltdown, (its tradition now), but that should be the last of the babies conceived out and on facebook whilst I've been trying. Having said that it's about time someone else announced their "joyous news"

ooohhh yes - Put things off!! I'm all in favour of putting things off.

Never put off till tomorrow what you can put off today.

I can procrastinate for England....

Course... we could just put off breeding for a bit to ensure no baby Hitlers/ Damians

sitting well, as the others know, I am the paragon of virtue here in the BESH lair - don't drink, smoke, take drugs or even eat food that's bad for you. But not getting any O S for a bit? It is indeed taking the fucking piss! (And TYF is the master, believe me ) And straight after the fertile-time holiday next week, we're going to his parents' place in Devon for a week. He will of course have to make it up to me, but will his parents think he has lockjaw and rush him off to the Doctors?

Oh christ, have turned into an even bigger pervert than usual - must be close to ovulation, wahey!