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Original poster

PAINFULLY broody

31 replies

Bobbins · 07/05/2003 21:21

Simple as that really. Just went down the road to get a pint of milk and saw this bloke putting his maybe, four month old baby in the car. I felt horribly jealous.

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Mum2Toby · 08/05/2003 21:09

THe YURT is waiting to be filled this evening. Everyone else OD'd and are sleeping it off with buckets by their beds.

I ditched the rest of the nettle wine coz it had been corked. But I've brough some home-made Oak Leaf wine? 14%!!

Bobbins, you're a brave woman! I hope you're new dp comes around to the idea soon.

snickers · 08/05/2003 21:03

Bobbins - glad to see your keyboard is now paying attention - or were you posting at work (ssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!)

I am still thinking about you on a regular basis, and it saddens me to read your post, but does not surprise me. The yearning, longing, the sheer intensity of broodiness for one who has lost a baby so early on in his life... well - I can imagine, I really can.

So very glad to hear your new relationship is good, and you have found love again. Concentrate on this for now, and trust that your time will come again, but let him know (without pressure) how important having another baby in your life is. He must understand this, and I'm sure he does - but knowing your past probably makes him scared that a new baby would take you away from him. He's probably not wrong either.

If you kids are in love, things should work out. I can't wait to read the "I'm Pregnant!" thread you post. It will happen, but take it gently.

Are you still talking to bereavement councillors?

Once again - feel mightily inadequate to respond in the best way - other than I and many others are still routing for you...

I'm sure there's a warm spot in the yurt being saved for you. I haven't ventured in there yet - but keep peering in through a small gap in the yak skin covering... Come in with me and see if we can mooch some of the dubious substances going around, and see if Brad is free now

Claireandrich · 08/05/2003 20:45

Cyberhugs here too Bobbins. I can't imagine what you have been through but you and your little angel are in my thoughts tonight.

Marina · 08/05/2003 13:33

And another big cyberhug from me, dear Bobbins. Sad days can still catch one unawares, can't they. I think Spring is paradoxically quite a sad time for people who have lost a baby - all the zinging new greenery is surprisingly hard to take, isn't it. XXX

Scatterbrain · 08/05/2003 13:14

Bobbins, Darling !!!!......big cyber-hugs winging their way to you !!

Glad to see you're still here anyway. You're doing brilliantly - all good things will come eventually.

Big Hugs xxxxxxxx

Original poster
Bobbins · 08/05/2003 09:04

Thanks dot1....good luck to you too. It sounds like you are having quite a hard slog in that department too at the moment. Let us hope it comes alright (ooer missus).

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dot1 · 08/05/2003 08:57

oh Bobbins - lots of love and support coming your way - I didn't know about your loss until this thread. Hope your wait for a baby isn't too long.xxx

Demented · 07/05/2003 22:29

Loads of hugs Bobbins.

Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 22:20

Mum2Toby> its great. I read them out to my office mate!

Now....this is a horrible confession...but I have to say it, and hope it doesn't sound snobby...or looking at my own motherhood through rose tinted bi focals...but I feel so SAD when I see nasty types treating their kids horribly...I can't STAND IT....EUGH...

Realise the gift you have...FOOL

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Mum2Toby · 07/05/2003 22:12

Isn't it lovely bobbins - that thread has been making me laugh all day!

I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through, but you're story has touched everyone that has read it I'm sure. And one day I hope you have another bundle of joy ... or 2 and that you can watch them grow up and have loads of children of their own!

In the meantime... loads of hugs and I hope tomorrow is a better day.

Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 22:12

correction....over old threads

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Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 22:10

janh> I was looking back ove old thread I've been on earlier, and realised all the great feedback from you that I haven't responded to, but felt like it ewas too late to resurrect now.

Just wanted you to know...I appreciate it, and look forwards to communicating more, and sorry if I didn't look like I was responding. My Mumsnet addiction is slightly sporadic, and sometimes I have to "walk away from the keyboard"!

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Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 22:06

Anyway> I really love seeing people doing lovely things with their kids. Looking through the jealousy ...it really warms the cockles of my heart as it were. That is why I started the thread....perhaps. I don't want to go over old ground!

I so heart the "things kids say' thread!!!

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janh · 07/05/2003 22:05

Awww, Bobbins, have been wondering where you'd gone - can and can't imagine how it feels for you to see someone else with a baby and wanting yours back - Harvey always sounded like such a treasure.

I know you will get there again - just a question of time and circumstances - do go on laying your grief on us, won't you? (It's what we're here for.)

xxx

Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 22:01

SamboM> I'd like to be...but my silly ex couldn't cope with my feelings I think...he bailed out...so now I am with someone who has never had a child, but actually seems much more responsible, but doesn't feel ready for bairns. I've been concentrating on my career for the last couple of months, and that has been working really well, but I want to make a go of having another VERY soon.

catch 22...I really do love the new partner.

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Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 21:57

I'm sure its something we all feel when we want another baby, knowing how wonderful (and dreadful at times) having a child can be. All those exciting, but difficult, new experiences.

And all the different stages. I feel like I'd be starting from scratch, but even more scared perhaps, if I even manage to have another one.

It is so much hard work, but I found my experience incredibly rewarding, even though it didn't last.

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SoupDragon · 07/05/2003 21:53

I didn't think you were looking for attention, Bobbins!

SamboM · 07/05/2003 21:53

Are you trying for one?

Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 21:53

kaz> not a problem, honest!

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Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 21:52

yuk...looks like I'm looking for attention, yet again. I'm not. I just REALLY want another baby!

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Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 21:49

interested> my little boy died just over a year ago. He had pneumococcal meningits and it went un diagnosed after many visits to the doctor.

yes, he was my first and only. I'm sure if you do a search on my name, if you are really interested, you'll find more detail.

I have used and abused and been wholeheartedly gratified by the support I have received here.

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kaz33 · 07/05/2003 21:48

Sorry Bobbins

SamboM · 07/05/2003 21:48

Can't imagine what it must be like for you. As you say all that happiness and now nothing.
Thinking of you.

SoupDragon · 07/05/2003 21:47

Sending hugs your way, Bobbins.

Original poster
Bobbins · 07/05/2003 21:46

SamboM> no worries.

Between this site and mainly the excellent support I have received from so many people, I have got through it, so far, as best I can, and, I suppose, relatively unscathed, and feeling strong and positive. It's still incredibly hard sometimes, and often it's the silliest little things that set me off.

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