The Hut of Gl/Doom... Please don't ask about our reproductive plans as a smack round the head with TCOYF often offends

Hello pollypoo I am also borerline diabetic so I shouldn't really eat sugar so I'll definately go on that website.

Heebeejeebee - thanks for your post, I am feeling rubbish today as a really good friend is finishing work for mat leave, when I started ttc she wasn't even married and has been travelling the world etc... and then decided to ttc and fell pregnant in the first month. Am really pleased for her but am so sad thinking I will never be in that situation. AF arrived today to smack me in the face again!!!

I am hopefully going to try IUI it has taken me so long to convince DH that it is not going to happen naturally and he has just agreed to try it. He is not really keen on IVF andI am so worried that if IUI doesn't work we are going to have to have really difficult talks. I just feel it's so unfair as it seems to be taking all the magic out of having a baby!

Hello Poppy, welcome to the hut

I keep getting a candida overgrowth in my gut, and do sometimes get vaginal thrush too (sorry tmi!), although the two don't necessarily go together.

I know when its flared up again (usually because I am rubbish at eating the odd treat... one leads to another and another and another until I just gorge myself ). I usually get very very tired, sore throat, earache, headaches, muscles ache, bloating, constipation and/or diarrhoea, and when its really bad I also get very down, irregular periods, EVIL pmt.... the list just goes on.

Have a look at the National Candida Society's website (candida-society.org). They have quite a good checklist of symptons, as well as things that can set it off.

If you think you may have it, I'd suggest getting tested, although your doctor probably won't want to bother. I go to a lovely lady in Somerset who runs a company called Allergy Test UK - she does have testers around the country. Where are you based? If you have got it, you will probably have to cut out some foods and take some supplements to help repair the damage to your gut, but it shouldn't be forever and you can usually start re-introducing foods again slowly after 8 weeks. Unless you are like me - I am unable to do it slowly and end up with the same problems again and again.

Anyway, sorry for the long post, but I hope it is of use.

Poppy - you've come to the right place! I'm having the same nightmare as you - my friends are conceiving no 2 and I haven't managed one yet I am going to be referred for the lap and dye next month, then once I've had that, will be referred for IVF (at 37 apparently the chances of IUI working are minimal)

I'm taking the Zita West vits and also the Zita West omega 3 due to being borderline for killer cells. DH is actually taking more than me.

It just seems so unfair, doesn't it? Fingers crossed that it happens very soon for us

Whoops should be thrush not trush!!!!

Hello guys,

Can I join???

Used to message alot on MN then tried to forget about all this ttc thingy (it didn't work!). Am now hoping to try IUI in December and really need to speak to others going through ttc again. My story is ttc for nearly 4 years, 1 mc 3.5 years ago and nothing since. Diagnosed with unexplained infertility

pollypoo what is this Candida thingy and how did you know what it was?? I have diabetes and before I was diagnosed was constantly having trush, is it related?? What can I do to help it if it is???

Also does anyone know what I should be taking to maximise things for 3 months time? Am fed up after being on folic acid for 4 years but feel I should make the effort in the short term to maximise IUI

I'm really glad I popped back am so sick of super fertile friends who are all pregnant with number 2 and weren't even trying when I had my mc. One of my closest friends explained to me that I was over 30 and fertility does decline! Even though she waited until 32 to have her first and got pregnant straight away with no. 2 at 34!!! I really need some ttc buddies!!

Hi Rainbow - my friend ended up with a similar result. She'd had 2 mc and went for the tests. She took asprin + had a jab early on (also related to blood clotting)and I'm pleased to report she has a beautiful 6 month old now.
I take baby asprin too due to my pcos.
I'm good thank you - all going well at last!
I think of you too - I'll keep popping back to hopefully read some good news soon.

Take care x

Hi Rainbow. Glad to hear the tests came back ok. I take junior asprin too (though I take it all the time, not just from when I get a positive test). As you say, at least you feel like you are doing something constructive..

Well I got my blood test results back and next time I get pregnant I have to take asprin, no positive test except one that was borderline, so the asprin is as a precaution, well at least it gives me something to do.

Hi to everyone.

Hi Mowmi - I am back with ttc, but not raising any hopes too soon. I have an appointment on Monday with the recurrent miscarriage clinic, to get the results of blood tests to see if there is any reason for the m/c's, but I don't expect to get anything but normal results, so not sure that they will be able to do anything to help. Hope your pregnancy is going well, I think of you often.

Hello Ladies,

Just popping in to say hello to Rainbowdays - how you doing? What's the latest news with you? Just read you're trying not to think about all things ttc - really hope you get the pregnancy you deserve soon.

xx

Lissie - just wondering how you are, thinking of you.

Sigh... me too Isle... I seem to be surviving on food that tastes like cardboard and so many supplements that I rattle - the lengths I will go to to get PG seem to have no bounds. Still, at least I am half a stone lighter... every cloud has a silver lining and all that!

I am determined next month will be THE month. It is my new positive mental attitude.

Drink up now - medicinal purposes - its good for you!

Thanks Polly, I've been missing my glass of red lately!

Welcome Isle :-) (slopes over... offers large glass of red, and some green and blacks)

Why must everyone, including the nurse at the FC try to blow smoke up my arse??? "It's ok, wait two more days - those hpt don't mean anything, I've seen women get pg on day 14 with only a 40 hCG level..." ARGGGG!

yes, but I confimed with her that she's also seen plenty of women who had better response and embies than me also fail - right? RIGHT! So leave me to my gloom and doom, because there are no miracles on day 13 and 14 dpo.

False hopes and careening blindly into a brick wall doesn't help, people! At least I have my let down in stages - not all at once! Do they want me picking out baby names and browsing catalogs until the moment they call with the bad news??? I just don't get it!

rant over - hi everyone I'm isle - LOL

Hi all

Shreks - how are things?

Tatty - fingers crossed your bloods come back ok and you get your appointment through quickly (I think I waited about 10 weeks for mine).

Polly Glad you had a nice weekend! I put DH on the Zita West vitamen, but he did a bit of research himself and is also taking flaxseed, gingseng and saw palmetto. There is another one but I can't remember what its called. I love the sound of horneygoatweed though!!!!

Thanks Shrek. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. Any developments? I've been sort of putting my head in the sand, but nine months in I am going to start to be more pro-active. So, I'm doing blood tests this month, and after that will be referred to clinic at the hosp (according to GP anyway).

Hey all

Just come back from a girls weekend in Devon so feeling a little less like I want to bash DH with frying pan.

Tatty, yes I've had some bloods done, the first lot my FSH and LH levels were raised. But after a couple of months of acupuncture they are back down in the 'normal' range thankfully. The Doc won't do anything else now until DH does his test... and I will think I will die waiting for that to happen. So I guess all I can do is carrying on with the acupuncture and supplements, get some exercise and PRAY that I get pg soon. (and in the mean time try not to be jealous of everyone around me with their gorgeous bumps and/or try not to snap at people when they come out with the usual "well meaning" comments regarding our lack of bubba no2.. GARRRR )

What supplements have you got your DH on Heebee? Mine is on zinc, maca and hornygoatweed! If there is anything else worth trying though, I am happy to force them down his throat get some for DH.

Shreks I know how you feel - it seems that every month is a rollercoaster of hopes and emotions and sometimes it is so bad I just want to give up. But like you I always find another reason to keep going. Still got everything crossed for you. x

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Howdy all

Polly DH doesn't really want to do IVF either, though we get our 2 free goes as we're 37 and ttc no 1. i think he just wants to do it normally. Personally I don't care - whichever is quicker!! However he is happy to do the tests (did one this week, in fact!) and is taking every supplement under the sun...

Shrek I hate that limbo state, where there's still an element of hope, but you just don't know... Any news?

lissie - hope you are ok

Oh Polly, that sounds really confusing for you. How frustrating.It sounds like you have reached a brick wall. Have the tests you have done ruled out any particular issue from yuour side? I'm coming up to 38 and have been actively ttc no 2 for nine months, so am in a similair-ish boat.

Message withdrawn

Tatty

His concerns are valid I think, and things that have crossed my mind, like what effect will another baby have on our relationship. But he also thinks that my desire for another bubba somehow devalues him and DD, and I just cannot get it through to him that this is not the case.

He says that because of his concerns he is happy to try as we have for the last 15 months, but there is a world of difference between trying, and going for acupuncture/sperm tests etc etc. His only concession is to take supplements. He is against IVF for reasons I can't quite understand, and we wouldn't be able to get IVF for free, or afford it ourselves. But I just wish he'd do the damn sperm test - I've done as much as I can and the doctor can't just refer me to the fertility clinic. I would really like to know if there is a problem, so we can either stop putting ourselves through this, or work out how to fix it.

He did say something which made me v sad - when I was saying how amazing motherhood is and how its the best thing I've ever done (hence wanting to do it again and again), he said fatherhood is the hardest thing he's ever had to do. I think its because he's always been quite selfish and hates having to be the breadwinner (even though we both agreed before DD that I should stay at home), and he hates that he doesn't have the same free time to himself anymore, stuff like that. But at the same time he absolutely adores Boo, she is the apple of his eye.

He just seems a mass of contradictions. He wants Boo to have a sibling, but he doesn't want a baby. He wants us to have another baby, but he doesn't want to go as far as I would to have another.

I suppose because he is not that bothered, he kind of feels 'if it happens, great. If it doesn't, not the end of the world'. But that doesn't take account of my feelings.

Sorry, really long post again

Lissie thinking of you. And Shreks how are you? I can so empathise with what you are going through.

Have a good day all. x

Oh Polly . Did he say what his concerns are? Is this totally out of the blue for you?

Hello, anyone in here? [... stomps in, throws self in a heap in corner, open bottle of vodka...]

I am just wondering why on earth I bother... I am rattling with the amount of supplements I am taking, I've been for another bout of acupuncture, I'm sorting out my diet etc etc.

But had big chat with DH (see AIBU to want to hit DH around the back of the head with frying pan thread).

He has concerns about having another child, which he has kept to himself for months and months, and hence why it feels like I am the only one ttc. He won't go for acupuncture or do the sperm test for the doctor.

ffs I am 38, I haven't got time for him to play silly buggers - he said he didn't tell me his concerns before because he was waiting for me to ask. grrrrr!

He says he does understand how desperate I am for another bubba. Which makes all this all the more hurtful... I know I am being a bit overdramatic but I feel like he is digging his heels in to deny me what I most desire, because the thing I most desire isn't him. (He has never recovered from the fact he ceased to get so much attention when DD arrived.)

If I wasn't on this darn anti-candida diet, I'd be breaking open the chocolate and red wine. And trying to drown myself in it