TTC while overweight

Just read Jools1's story - just to say my BMI is around the 30 mark. I'm 41 and miscarried last year - but I'm now 35 weeks pregnant.

hey ladies
i'm so glad this post is here. i'm TTC at the moment (since mid-April) and no joy so far. One of the things that has been weighing on my mind since then has been that I have a BMI of about 31, and have been stressing out a bit about it.

The conclusion that this board has led me to is that medical opinion differs widely - it looks like people have had loads of conflicting advice, but what I think is probably the most important factor is that all of us are consciously trying our hardest to bring a child into the world in the best possible circumstances. Yes, it's probably not great that we're carrying a few extra pounds, but we'll do our best to be good mothers.

Good luck to everyone here - if it feels right, just go for it, but don't forget to try and live a healthier lifestyle regardless.

suedehead x

P.S. I think we also have a duty to our potential unborn children not to be too hung up on weight. We need to impress upon them that it's important to be happy rather than a certain size or BMI number...

A friend of mine was seriously overweight when she got pregnant with her now 6-year-old girl. And when I say seriously, we're talking something in the region of 18st. She wasn't intending on becoming pregnant so may well have taken action to lose weight if she was TTC at the time. She had a completley trouble free pregnancy and long labour but also quite straight forward.

I think, ultimately, complications can ensue for any number of reasons, but in the overwhelming majority of cases, things will be fine, no matter whether you carry a bit of extra weight or not. I've also been told the same as yellowflowers, age is more of an issue than weight.

Some Drs view themselves as "being cruel to be kind", when in fact they're just being cruel. Doesn't help that anyone who isn't a size 10 is an officially ordained bogeyman and threat to the future of the nation now.

I've had GPs shout at me about my weight - I'd only gone in for a smear test! It's not acceptable doctor-patient behaviour, they wouldn't get away with it for anything else - but because the Govt's said fatty-bashing is ok - they do it. It meant I didn't go back to the GP for years after that, even through the hideously obesity-related illness of an ear infection and perforated eardrum!

Having said that - I had to lose 3 stones to kick my reproductive system up the arse into functioning again... then miscarried which I think is just one thing that would have happened anyway.

When me and DH decided we would want to start TTC sometime soon and wanted to have my coil taken out and go on the pill... long story but wanted to have a nearly normal period ect as not had one in 9 yrs ect and I was told at the family planning clinic that I was mad to think that I could go on the pill with my 'emmence' body weight it wouldnt 'stand a chance' and planning on having a child in my condition would make me a 'totally unfit mother'

Im 25 with a BMI of 44 and this ended up with me uncontrolably crying with DH wanting to go back in and make her appologise for talking to me like that.

Luckily for me our local GP is excellent and I saw the practice nurse who helped me with my plans, arranged for my coil to be removed, start the pill and a healthy eating plan with exercise plan so now I will be starting TTC in the new year if not before with her total support.
She said its not an ideal situation but theres loads of not ideals out there who are all out there and having children!

Sorry that nearly turned out to be a rant but got to say I dont believe anyone can be judged as a number especially a BMI when I dont see the smokers, heavy drinkers and recreational drug users lineigng up to beat themselves up over it before having children like those who have a high BMI!

Good luck to everyone out there and there baby wishes

My BMI is about 36 and I had a fantastic first pregancy and a lovely baby afterwards. I put on about 3 stone, which I haven't really lost in the 18 months since she was born, and am now having trouble concieving and think that I may have had an early miscarriage last cycle. I have been doing accupuncture, and she told me that you shouldn't strictly diet while trying to concieve, just eat healthily and do moderate, low impact exercise which I am trying to do. I think that there is so much more than just weight as a stand alone issue going on, and the GP is just trying to offload you without having to do any tests or anything himself!

I feel for you, cantwaitforxmas. Some doctors do seem to forget that we're adults and they can put over their position without treating us like naughty kids. Some of my (older) pals have had the same attitude for 'leaving it a bit late' (as if anyone ever 'left it late' on purpose!). I mean, it's not as if you went in saying,'oh, being overweight is great and I'm working on getting fatter, not thinner' is it?!!!'

I do think elkiedee has a very important point. It's often the case that these reports talking about dangers are based on a sample that sought infertility treatment, ie. they already had something going wrong for quite a while. People who were absolutely fine were not in the sample.

I'm glad you've decided to get a more helpful doctor. Good luck.

Just want to reassure you that when I conceived DD1 I was 5 stone overweight with a BMI of 39. I conceived after just 2 baby dances. I gained only 10lbs during my entire pregnancy. DD was a very healthy 5.12lb who arrived 3 days early.

I never felt better than I did when I was preganant. I was very careful what I ate and did continue exercising.

One of the community midwives did say that I had to see a consultant because a lot of overwight women have very large babies but it depends on how you eat during pregnancy rather than how you eat know. You will change what you eat - I found it happened quite naturally because you are so aware of looking after another little person.

Good luck TTC. I'm about to embark on TTC baby#2. I'm still 5 stone overweight and will do as I did last time, eat healthily and walk a lot.

I didn't say BMI was the whole story but what do you expect the GP to say?

I meant increase not improve in my last post obviously.

I have to point out that the study was, according to the article, of women who had attended fertility counselling, ie whatever the issue was, these women already had problems which had led them to seek help.

Well that link is a massive kick in the face At 39, I don't have time to hang around much longer trying to lose wait, so I'll just have to hope that my miscarriage last week was not down to a BMI of 32 and move swiftly on.

BMI isn't the whole story.

Yes I am overweight and, despite trying HARD for 3 years to shift it, I've still got a way to go.

HOWEVER, I lost loads and loads of weight when sick with gastroenteritis for a month earlier this year. I was in bed for 4 weeks, lost a stone and my BMI obviously went down. During recovery, I was still eating extremely healthy food and small portions but went back to the gym - stuck ALL that weight back on but the weight was muscle, not fat. They should look at percentage of fat v muscle in the body aswell. You can be fit and muscular but considered obese.

cantwait, I think your BMI might be slightly more than 29 (mine was 29, something in first pregnancy and was nearly 31 this time round, from weight at 9 weeks), but I wouldn't accept the assumption that it's a problem, if you feel ready to ttc you can always start trying and continue your healthy eating/exercise efforts at the same time and see what happens.

First, over 30 is counted as obese on the BMI charts, but it's a pretty crude measurement - it also depends on where you carry most of your weight - it's better for it to be on hips and thighs/all over then all concentrated around your abdomen/waist. I conceived first time trying this time and haven't actually had real complications at this point - 30 weeks - in my 2nd pregnancy in spite of age and size. They made me take a glucose tolerance test but that was arranged on grounds of my weight alone and there wasn't a problem found.

I'm glad to hear you're going to move GP, his attitude does sound awful.

But figures also needed for studies linking age to miscarriage to know whether each month risk improves more than it lessens as she loses weight.

I am going to go against the consensus and say perhaps losing more weight first would be a good idea. Depends on your age too.

I assume you asked your GP about your weight and ttc?

Latest studies link BMI of over 25 and an increased risk of mc Overweight women at greater risk of miscarriage

cantwaitforxmas- i'm overweight, have been in this pragnancy and my last... my BMI is at 32... do more than your's... i think i've lost about a stone while pregnant through sickness.... but i was about 13stone before falling pregnant, but ate healthily, and got plenty of exercise walking to nursery and back twice a day (40min round trip x2) and thats saying i did nothing else all day....

My midwife said as long as my BMI doesn't increase while pregnant, and i get a healthy diet and some exercise i should be fine like i was last time!!

When I was weighed by the midwife at my booking in, my BMI was 33. I HAD put on half a stone through early PG bloating and do carry a lot of muscle because I have been losing weight steadily over a couple of years and was doing 6 - 8 gym classes per week. MW wasn't worried but said I'd have to go under a consultant if my BMI got up to 35.

My GP was a little shite though - was very critical till I made him look up my weight history and see how much I've lost (3 stone)

My goal was to eat loads and loads of fruit and be mega healthy, maintain an exercise regime and show everyone at the 16 week mw appt that I was not fat and, despite their obvious opinions of fat pregnant women, some of us CAN restrain ourselves and genuinely do have an issue losing weight.

Unfortunately I never got to the 16 week appt as I m/c'ed a week ago at 11+4.

However, now I've stopped bleeding, my waist is still thicker than it was but my weight is 2 pounds less than it was 12 weeks ago, so it IS possible. I was lucky (or maybe it was a sign and I was unlucky) - I had mild nausea, but no sickness so could continue eating anything I wanted within reason.

You are NOT overweight and have nothing to worry about.

(ps - am now eating chocolate as if it is going out of fashion, but have decided I'm allowed to wallow in a pit of sugar for a while)

I just made sure I didn't give in to chocolate and junk food cravings very often. I ate far too much junk food with DS and put on 4 stone. So this time if I was craving some chocolate I had an apple or something healthy.

How were you strict Kayzis?

I was overweight when I conceived DC2, my GP told me that I could do with losing some weight but it was not nessecery(sp) and my BMI is 29.

37 weeks later and I haven't put on anywhere near as much weight as I did with DS as I have been much more strict about it.

Well I hope that is true.

I think eating the right sort of food is the answer. Water dense nutrient rich food. And lots of water. That's my aim.

Apparently fat people often put on less while pregnant than smaller people. Perhaps because that is when we are conscious of eating healthily so we actually end up eating less than usual where other people end up eating more than usual.