First time TTC?!! Let's get through this together!! Part 2

oo saz how exciting! are your cycles regular? mine are like clockwork so i know if i am a day or two late then something is up, i did have a false alarm in April when i was 3 days late and i was almost convinced i was PG until the evil witch called in a little late!! keep us posted.

and a big HI THERE to everyone else - hope we are all havinga fab sunday

Hello all,

Welcome to Bubbap and welcome back Fairywing!!

Gosh, loads to catch up on!!

So, Food first. Well, as several of you have said, our Mum's didn't have to follow any guidelines other than unpasteurised stuff and pate. So I'm with Mum. I'm going to avoid anything unpasteurised, shellfish and runny eggs. I don't eat liver anyway so that's not really a problem.

I think the most important thing is to have a balanced diet. I don't drink coffee anyway (love the smell but have never liked the taste) and have changed to decaf tea already. But only because I don't really drink anything else so I thought as I drink so much tea that I should cut out the caffeine! With peanuts, they only say that you should avoid it if you have a history of asthma or excema within your immediate family and we have none. I won't eat them all the time, obviously, but I won't not eat something just because it has peanuts in it.

Nanny question. No chance for us. We just won't have the money. We're about to buy our first house and are looking for a 3-bed because I work from home. But the child will be in full time nursery from 3 months. I only get 6 weeks maternity leave at 90% pay which is rubbish. But I'm going to try and save enough beforehand to cover us for 3 months. I'm the main breadwinner aswell so if I don't work, our mortgage and bills won't be paid!!

However, I have found recently that our company do a flexible working agreement where I can do my standard weekly hours over 4 days if I want to. So I'll plan to have Fridays off. Also, we do have an option of my SIL who doesn't work through the day and may have the child for 1-2 days a week (paid obviously). Lots of options (hopefully!).

C-Section question. My elder sister had one natural and one c-section and said she would go for the natural every time. She said that the recovery from the C-Section was horrible and she couldn't look after herself, the baby and her toddler. So it was really difficult. Especially since they ran a restaurant at the time so my BIL, the Chef, was in the restaurant all hours so couldn't help her.

But I'll do whatever is best for the baby - not saying I'm "Too posh to push" - but just don't fancy it much!! Ha ha ha!!

Need to go and put the dinner on - be back soon!!

xxx

oh bubbap! I'm sorry I don't k ow if I said hello or not! Hi and welcome!

Saz you are beinG very good and it's a great sign Af is not here! Fingers crossed for you sweetie xx

Girls,

Thanks for the welcome messages!

saz007 - good luck for the test tomorrow, keep us posted!

Hi all,

Just a quick update. Still haven't tested yet, I discussed this with DH yesterday and we've agreed to wait until tomorrow morning as AF was only due today (I know I was the impatient one who couldn't wait last week!!!) One good thing is that AF hasn't shown up yet

Hello and welcome to bubbap and fairywing

Bonifacio I'll be doing my best to stick to all the gudielines as I agree they've been put in place by those that know more than me. DH and I are looking to go to Florida at the end of the year and I will have to pass up going on the rollercoasters - but it's only for one trip so I'm not that bothered

that's awful! She should have just adopted if she's that bothered about her figure LOL

Does she know you're TTC? I meet a lot of parents to be honest that just Make me feel sorry for the kids I hope she doesn't turn out to be one of them. Let's hope she is just putti g an act on for you! Xx

your friend does not sound very maternal! She may change when the baby is here you never know, i've known people who have said similar things then as soon Asthe baby Is there they change! I am goon to try to find that research again but it was
Something like VaC birth without intervention is safest
Then elective cesarian (risk to mother higher)
then natural birth with intervention (forceps etc can me traumatic for baby)
Then emergency cesarian that leaves risk to both

However, with this there were also facts (I don't remember figures sorry!) but natural births without intervention are actually very rare (hence all the deaths in childbirth before advance in medical science!)

I personally am going to enquire about an elective c section due to family history (my mother almost died as did my sister in childbirth) and after the botched emergency c section my sister had to have she was told she may not be able to have any more children. In my experience safe and normail VAc births just don't happen!

However, of your friend is just worried about the pain I suggest she lives for a week with somebody who has just had major Abdominal surgery! Having a baby is going to hurt either way! I think people just need to add up the risks and discuss with close
Family members their experiences.

Maybe she is putting on a brave face as she is really scared? If you are quite close to this girl I would fry to have a serious chat with her and get her to look at All options

welcome bubbap and welcome back fairywing

i would rather not have a C Section unless absolutely necessary, i had a laparoscopy a few weeks ago and agree with wildfig ie you really dont appreciate how much you use your belly button and stomach muscles! I would rather have the full natural birth but if my or my baby's health is at risk then i would go for the CS.

As for childcare, neither DH nor i can afford to give up work - i may go to 4 days per week but i reckon we will be scouting out local nurseries, i would want my child to learn to socialise (and share!) from as early an age as poss.

Ooo my first time on MN on my phone, how exciting lol! Just sitting in the hair dresser's with a head full of foil's lookin rather silly. Just managed to skim through the last few pages so will have a proper read through tomorrow. We're not havin a hen night due to lack of time as only decided to get married 5 weeks ago. But have met up with friends over the last few weeks. Am getting really excited now. Hope your all havin a fab weekends x

Hello bubbap and fairywing!

I think when my mum was pregnant with me in 74 the doctor actually recommended halves of Guinness and red meat (?!) And I suspect she smoked too, although she fervently started denying this when my sister and I were of an age to ask! I'd go with the sensible options about dodgy shellfish and unpasturised stuff - it's only for 9 months, after all. It's giving up coffee that'll do me in, not the booze.

And as far as elective C-sections go (I'm a C-section baby too!), I can't make up my mind whether it's easier or safer than squeezing out a bowling ball. In my family, you seem to end up with a stack of stitches either way. I had a whole load of fibroids out 2 years ago, which was effectively like half a c-section what with the general anaesthetic/stitches/morphine/no-driving recovery time and so on, and it took me longer to get over than I imagined it would. Who knew your stomach muscles were involved in basic actions like driving and standing up? The scar's healed, but my stomach is Not What It Was. Don't celebs book in for 8-month c-sections, before the serious stretching starts, then get lipo'd out at the same time?

And no to nannies. DH and I are both freelancers, so we're planning on sharing the childcare between us and putting any nanny money towards a house with a shed at the bottom of the garden, so we can take it in turns to go to sleep in peace.

Can I put in a dancefloor request for Groove is in The Heart by Dee-Lite and Jump Around by House of Pain?

Hello ladies!

Can I please join this thread? Been lurking for a while and thought it was about time I added a little message...

Here's a bit of info about me so I can be added to your charts: I'm 30 and been married almost 3 years. Just recently had "The Conversation".

So.... I'm TTC #1, Cycle 1, CD14.

MAF sorry looks like we are hijacking your wedding!! CHEEEEEESSSEEE all the way

omigod an absolute necessity (summerbird does the hand over face movement....)!

How about a bit of TIFFANY to add to the list - I think we're alone now???

ps - hope you are having a fab time BSL and that the weather is better than it is here. We are off to South Wales next weekend and my DH and best mate are going to teach me to surf - i cant wait! x

saz - I KNEW IT!!!! coming from Shields the odds were on that you are a mackem (sorry i wont use that term anymore - but i had to have one little one!!)

anyway, you go girl, i too check every 5 mins when i am due AF so to me that is not TMI...

heverhoney that song is fine by me! oo as long as we can also have 'Where Love Lives' by Alison Limerick - god i am such a 90s geek!

Hi all,

Just popped on for a quick catch up...

I'm a footie fan too - Sunderland (stop that laughing Summerbird!!) and DH is a Man U fanatic - god help our DC At least we both agree on the cricket team!!!

Still no AF here. Is this bad, and sorry if TMI but every time I go for a wee I have to double check...told you TMI...sorry!

DH jumped me last night but also !! I guess he still wants it to be fun and not just about the TTC...bless his cottons! He's a bit worried if I do get a +ve test this month that I'll push him away as "his job is done"

As for my outfit for Thursday, I have a chocolate and gold prom dress with gold shoes and a gold fascinator (I'm with you Dawn I don't do hats!!)

MAF I lovE that song! I'll be singing along at 2.30 on Thursday!!

Bon no we wont be having a nanny. I'll be back at work after my mat leave, but am hoping to change my hours to work 5 over 4 and do a couple of days from home. I think PIL will help out looking after the baby for a day a week and we're thinking of childcare/nursery for the same reasons as you Crunchy. As for the c-section, I'm not sure about this yet. I am scared of the whole birthing process (the head thing is terrifying me!!), but I think I kinda want to go thru it IYKWIM?

Whew! That was a long post

Hi! Don't worry i'm always on my iPhone too!

Just to let you know I have had a very sexy morning with my DH and am now blowing balloons for my baby shower! It's all about babies today girls I hate footba and pretty much all sports! My husband is obsessed though Ms is insisting our babies are in football teams as soon as they can walk! xx

Forgot to say with the music can we replace the abba megamix with - duh dum duh dum dum de dum de dum -I love you baby

summerbird dont worry about it as you can tell I am used to having to fight my corner my sister is an arse!nal fan as are most of DPs family - will have to fight that one off with a vengance!! Glad I am not the only lady footie fan on the board!