Baby trapping my husband?

That would be terrible thing to do. If the sexes were reversed, would you tell a man to
impregnate his wife without her knowledge?

Imagine if a man wrote this about how he was going to just have sex with his wife without using anything even though he’s unsure, and that she’d probably come round to it in the end…..now think about your choices

It’s a vile thing to do. If he KNOWS you’re ovulating soon and chooses to DTD knowing the risk of pregnancy anyway then any “accidents” are absolutely on him. But not knowing or being lied to or deceived in any kind of way (ESPECIALLY by the person you’ve made vows to) is in every way abhorrent. If a woman was on here after finding out her partner had removed a condom half way through the act then everyone would be telling her it was rape. This is no different.

Given how reckless he’s been not using anything until now there’s every chance he’d still CONSENT to doing it knowing you were ovulating anyway (consent being the operative word), so why lie?

Equally, if you pretend an “accident” has happened after banging on to him about wanting another you aren’t kidding anyone. He’ll have his suspicions and come to resent you and mistrust you anyway. So it depends if a third baby is worth ruining your family for I guess, which is ironic given you seem to think it would “complete” it when it could actually wreck it.

OP, if I were your husband and you did this to me, I would leave and file for divorce. It's that serious.
Sometimes you have to accept that just because you "want" something, it doesn't mean that thing should happen. Your husband has a right to veto, and you know it.

What if you do become pregnant and he says this wasn't planned, I don't want another child and then you are faced with either terminating the pregnancy or going ahead and either way you are risking your relationship coming though this. He might divorce you.

My mate has an 8 year gap between him and his brother. They have nothing in common. As an early teen at 14 his brother was just an annoyance, by 18 he was off to uni and his brother was 10. Just because they are siblings does not mean they will get on.

Also as one of 3 children everything is geared towards 2 adults and 2 children.

Stay in the financially comfortable bracket.

It would be absolutely unhinged to do that. Genuinely insane behaviour.

Have you tried telling him that you’d really want another, and come up with a plan how to make it work financially and otherwise? He doesn’t seem totally against it, but that doesn’t mean that you should deceive him. If it is that important to you, have an honest conversation.

That’s a really underhand and devious thing to do to someone.

If you have an understanding whereby you track your cycle and avoid sex when you are ovulating then this would be a significant breach of trust.

Equally, if he is having sex with you without a contraception then he can't be that bothered.

I would tell him that you think you are ovulating and see hat he says.

I wouldn't lie or withhold that information because I would feel horrendous about it.

That is the ultimate cruelty to bring a child into the world who isn't 100% wanted by both parents. Be an adult and have a proper conversation about whether having a 3rd is what you both want. if not, he needs to get the snip. Flip your post round - imagine a man writing what you wrote, and that he was going to sabotage a condom or his partner's pills.

Good grief yes that would be an awful thing to do. Imagine if the tables were turned he would get ripped to shreds. I think he’s being quite sensible regarding the financial situation. Maybe sit down and have a proper conversation about it but definitely don’t deceive him. I agree with pp a baby should be wanted by both parents.

Do you really think baby trapping your husband is a good idea op? That's a vile thing to do and what does this say about your relationship if you cant be honest .
It seems like your husband is talking alot of sense. Hes expressed desired for more children but hes made it clear its not a good idea financially. Why would you force another child into the situation when its not comfortable right now

What sort of a bullshit relationship is it where you deliberately deceive your husband like that?.

I think he should have been smart enough to have the snip to protect again deliberate "accidents" but that doesn't mean you should exploit it.

If it does cause enough tension to break your marraige, how happy are you to be a single mum of 3?

Do you really think baby trapping your husband is a good idea op? That's a vile thing to do and what does this say about your relationship if you cant be honest .
It seems like your husband is talking alot of sense. Hes expressed desired for more children but hes made it clear its not a good idea financially. Why would you force another child into the situation when its not comfortable right now

Yes, it would be “that bad”

How do you think that will work out for the unwanted child? Do you imagine their relationship with the parent that doesn’t want them, will be good?

I would just tell him you think you’re ovulating and see if he wants to use a condom. Why lie? You know he won’t and will do it anyway.
I feel like if he sabotaged your pills you would be furious. I don’t feel like this is far off. A baby should be wanted by both parents.