The Hopeful Hearts Circle 1 - December 2025🎄💖

Hi ladies. I've been trying to read and keep up to date with you all and I am gutted to read your latest update @Taysonic I'm so sorry.

And to the others who've had losses and negative tests I'm so sorry too. It really doesn't get easier.

I'm in a bit of limbo myself which is very unexpected.

As you know AF arrived for me. I tested negative on 9dpo then af arrived 10dpo then i had my usual 5 days period. I sometimes get brown spotting for a day after and this cycle I had some brown on wiping for a few days but otherwise nothing different. As I gave PCOS I know my cycles can be longer so I usually start opk tests when I start seeing ewcm but since changing my diet/supplements & starting Metformin they're much shorter so I decided on cd10 (3rd march) I would start opk to see if I can track the rise more carefully so we can dtd more before ovulation. See if it would help.

This is where things get confusing because I did an opk and it came back BLAZING positive LH which was unexpected. I did research and liked it maybe to LH fluctuations with PCOS. I did another one a few hrs later expecting it to be less but it was just as strong. Somewhere in my memory I remember reading that it could be hcg causing it but how because I've literally just finished my period.

I dipped a pre-mom HCG dip stick anyway and it was positive. I then did a frer a which was also positive. Wtaf?!

I called epu for some advice because bleeding early then a BFP made me nervous and they said it could be an early loss but HCG still rising therefore retained tissues or I could be ectopic.

I had bloods on Wednesday and yesterday (48hrs apart) and now I'm just waiting to see what the results are. Then probably an early scan next week. My HCG Wednesday was 810 at around 20dpo. My brain is all over the place. I can't focus on anything and I have no idea what's going to happen.

I know how lucky I am to have caught after just a few cycles but why is this never easy?!

Im so sorry @Taysonic💕😔 so unbelievably sad to keep going through

@TaysonicI echo @LuckyDuck93I know you must be breaking inside but to keep looking forward and be grateful for what you already have is admirable. It is so exhausted and all consuming, I hope you’re able to find something nice to comfort you this evening. A mountain of chocolate or a long soak in the bath, whatever self care you need

@Taysonic Can't tell you how much I admire your way of changing your outlook on these things, even though you must be devastated too. Hope you find some wonderful holidays to go on! Still got my fingers crossed for you and will be thinking of you over the next few days x

Morning all. Thank you for your thoughts and well wishes - it does really make a difference.

I've taken today off work (well, I'm 'appearing offline' for the day but going to be doing a little bit of work in the background to help keep me distracted and occupied.. I just don't want to deal with people today. Not to mention I look like I've gone five rounds in the boxing ring my eyes are that puffy from crying!).

I haven't gone to EPAU. I know that there's not really much they can do at this stage - 5 weeks is too early for a scan to confirm anything. They could offer progesterone for the bleeding, but I'm already taking it so... the only thing they can really do is hcg blood tests but if I wait a few days, I can ascertain the direction myself at home with pregnancy tests. It's what we did last time and it was a much 'gentler' way to process the loss. My hospital is a good 45 min drive away so it's a long round trip and I'm not sure it's worth the effort.

I did email the fertility team that prescribed me the progesterone - just to let her know what's happening and to ask if I'm right to continue taking the progesterone in the short term until I can confirm which way hcg levels are going.

It's silly, but I did a variety of pregnancy tests this morning. An easy@home test as then I've got a way to track levels. This morning, the line was darker than two days ago but I expect that will fade over the next week. I also did a clear blue line test so I've got a 'nice' one to keep. I wrote the date on it and can keep it as 'evidence' for myself that this pregnancy did exist.

We'll see what today brings... I really am not holding out on any kind of hope. And I do feel very set on this being the end of my fertility journey now. I've tried. I did my best. And I'm not prepared to go through this rollercoaster again now.

I'm lucky. My losses have all been early. I know so many women endure far, far worse. I have my son. He's gorgeous and wacky and makes me laugh every day. I'm going to focus on the things that bring me joy in life that are within my control! Maybe now I can properly move house without worrying about the impact of maternity pay and future nursery costs. I'm going to book some holidays - the more the merrier! Book theatre tickets. Weekends away. Just do all the nice things.

@Iris2024this is great and so reassuring for you 🥰

@Taysonicdevastated for you 😔
You probably have at this stage but have you had all your bloods done and thyroid checked etc xx

@Taysonic sending you a lot of love, you must be so drained from all of this ❤ How are you feeling today?

@ttcnumerodosI’m so sorry. It took a couple of weeks for my negative test. I had EWCM at day20/21 so we tried then but LH strips didn’t show a peak so I’m not convinced. I think I might need to have a period before my body is going to ovulate which is frustrating

@FullofconfusionIt started the 16th Feb, then two days later at my scan there was no sign of pregnancy and a negative test. I should have been about 6 weeks. It was like a slightly heavier period. I'm about cd 17 which is spot on for me. Sorry you're in limbo. Did you try again this month or are you waiting for your period? xx

@Iris2024that truly is lovely positive news. I’m so happy for you.

@ttcnumerodoswhen was your miscarriage? I’m on cd30 if I count day 1 as the first day of miscarriage. I didn’t manage to catch a positive ovulation test and truly feel totally in limbo 🙈

Oh @TaysonicI’m so sorry. I had everything crossed for you. Have you rang the EPAU? I suspect this early they won’t scan but I know you’re taking the progesterone so may need some guidance

Oh my goodness this just seems so unfair to be happening again. I’m so sorry.

Oh @Taysonicim so sorry. Have you spoken to EPAU? Sending 🫂 and hope xxx

Hi all. Sorry to absolutely dump on the lovely positive news from @Iris2024 but it's not looking good for me.

Out of absolutely nowhere today, just started cramping and bleeding. I can't possibly imagine this will have a good outcome. It's a real kick in the teeth after seeing a few days of good test progression.

Only 4+6 weeks today. Not feeling in any way optimistic

Such great news @Iris2024, delighted for you 🥰 You are our beacon of hope!

How is everyone else doing? I got a positive ovulation test yesterday so officially back in the tww. Oh joy 🤣 Also in two weeks it'll be a year since my first miscarriage, so I'm expecting a bumpy emotional rollercoaster of a fortnight 🥴 x

Oh @Iris2024thsts wonderful! And you are right, lovely bit of hope for me

I am so glad your manager has been supportive and understanding, it makes such a huge difference @Fullofconfusion - keep taking it easy and being kind to yourself. Grief definitely comes in waves so I know there will still be really tough days ahead but hopefully everything takes you a bit closer to your rainbow baby. Fingers crossed you're not left with uncertainty too much about when AF might arrive and you get some answers and a fresh cycle to focus on soon.

@Esssa as horrible as it is, I'm glad the bleeding has started for you because I think sometimes the wait and anticipation of it is sometimes worse. If it helps, I tend to do a big comfort shop to help me get through it - last time I spent a small fortune in B&M and Sainsburys but came back with new pjs, blankets, hot water bottle, sweet treats, comforting drinks, new book to read, candles... anything and everything that might make the process a little bit 'softer'.

Wishing you luck with your IUI today @Allmywishcometrue - hopefully it's quick and efficient and does the trick! Let us know how it goes.

It's IUI day for me today. I feel like I am stuck in a loop.

Fingers crossed third time is the charm. I am torn between having a good feeling /hoping and being too afraid to hope. It's a weird feeling.

I'm okay so far. Had a bit of bleeding so it's starting. Consultant on Monday said it was a collapsing sac but still high up. I'm actually surprised it so quickly because last time it took a week off pessaries before I got any bleeding. I don't think they did any measurements but I'm a maximum of 7 weeks, which it definitely didn't look like so I'm hoping it's not too bad. All my other losses have been with growth at 8+ weeks and very floody for want of a better phrase.

I’m doing ok. Back to work this week which I’ve honestly been dreading. I mostly work from home luckily but will be back in the office soon which will be even more daunting. I’m just taking each day as it comes though and my manager has been very understanding.

Currently driving myself a bit mad. I think my period is on the way, grumbly crampy tummy and I’m super snappy 🙈 not sure if I ovulated or not as LH strips didn’t peak but I did have lots of EWCM 18 days after the miscarriage. I’m now on day 29. Tortured myself with a pregnancy test yesterday which of course was negative. Going to strap in and just wait for AF now but it’s so frustrating not knowing when it’s going to arrive.

How are you doing @Taysonic?

I hope you’re being kind to yourself @Esssa

That's a great but sad analogy of dangling sweets in front of a kid - I know exactly what you mean. How are you feeling now?

@Fullofconfusion how are you getting on? Thinking of you and sending love.

Tbh I think she was just mentioning things they can do. Not necessarily things that would apply to me which is a little like waving sweets in front of a toddler and then taking them away but we shall see. As I understand it from googling it helps with inflammation, placenta vascular system and immune responses. They are treating my with lmwh incase I have a clotting problem they haven't tested for so this cold be why she mentioned it.