The Hopeful Hearts Circle 1 - December 2025🎄💖

@Fullofconfusion sounds like you’ve had an incredibly traumatic and worrying time, there’s nothing worse than being in pain and not being reassured to what’s actually going on. I’m glad you were finally able to speak with somebody who showed you the care that you deserve, this really is your safe space to share too 🌸💕

@Fullofconfusion i'm so so sorry to hear your news ❤
Very glad that you seem to have had an empathetic and knowledgeable sonographer though, I think sometimes feeling like someone in a healthcare setting is in your corner means the world, because it can feel like you're having to fight for everything.

Sending you lots of love

Thank you ladies. I really truly appreciate all of your support.

@Taysonicthe private scan clinic did ring EPAU and told me that they’d call me back to book me in for a scan/bloods as a second opinion as they wouldn’t usually accept the clinic’s scan. They did ring but just booked me for a scan in 2 weeks without seeing me or taking any bloods which I didn’t think was right.
The pain wasn’t easing so I called EPAU last night and they agreed that I needed bloods to rule out an ectopic pregnancy so I’ve now been seen. This is what I felt I needed. The reassurance that I’ve been seen by the hospital. I knew I was miscarrying but as the scan had officially labelled it as “pregnancy of unknown location” that worried me and then along with the pain I was feeling pretty panicked. I got the impression that the nursing team I saw at EPAU were surprised that I’d not been scanned already by them or atleast had bloods taken. Anyway 1 extra scan (no cause found for the pain, everything looked ok but no pregnancy found which I already knew) and 1st lot of bloods taken to check HGC coming down.

The sonographer was lovely. Have a lot of incredibly helpful advice that no one has told us before. Advised that we can self refer for a scan at 7 weeks if we fall pregnant again as that’s their guideline for multiple losses. She was unhappy that I’d been turned away last week when I was bleeding and distressed and said she would follow that up to clarify the guidelines with whoever I spoke to. She also said I would be entitled to progesterone in another pregnancy and that although I shouldn’t have to advocate strongly for myself to get these things but that if anyone I spoke to said it was wrong I should ask them to check and tell them that she’d told me what the guidelines are. I honestly feel so much better from that one interaction. I’m still feeling rough and obviously devastated to be in this position again but being seen by the hospital has helped me to feel heard and given me the reassurance that this isn’t ectopic

@Fullofconfusion You don't bring the thread down, this is a safe space where we share the ups and down of our journeys. I am so sorry for what you are going through. You have the right to feel let down. They should check for an ectopic pregnancy and do the scan. I hope your GP wilm listen to you tomorrow.

Thank you @Taysonic, I think you’re probably right, it puts me in the grey area 🙄 which is hard to accept! They have agreed to test again next cycle (we’ll be in New York for this one so just hoping to enjoy the holiday and see what happens!) - so we’ll see what next cycle holds.. they said if the result is the same again next time they’d refer us on for IVF (if my partner’s semen analyse is normal).. not really a process I’m looking forward to but trying to come round to accepting it might be the route for us!

Apologies @J1644 I'm not particularly knowledgeable on progesterone levels, but in my experience, doctors can often misrepresent what they mean... if they're saying 16nmol doesn't prove ovulation, it doesn't necessarily mean it proves you haven't ovulated. It could just mean it's inconclusive. Perhaps you fall in the grey area where the result isn't conclusive either way? Would they consider doing a second progesterone test on your next cycle? What have they said are the next steps, if any?

I think I would feel a bit disappointed with that care as well @Fullofconfusion - and I would be worried about the pain up your back too. I was lucky with mine as the private scan rang straight through to EPAU who agreed to see me the next day for their own scan, and then did repeat bloods as standard, and continued to do them even though the levels were obviously dropping. I think I needed that reassurance at the time.

What do you need to help you process what's happening? (I ask that because at different times, I have needed different things... I obviously had the experience as detailed above and at the time, I think I was so confused and uncertain about what was happening that I wanted answers, whereas, in my loss over Christmas, I didn't need answers - I knew what was happening, and chose not to go down a medical route to make it less 'traumatic').

Whichever side of the fence you fall on, if you want to advocate for the care you want, I have found that asking ChatGPT to 'script' me something to say in those circumstances is quite helpful!

Ladies I need help :(

I had my fertility bloods the last 2 weeks.. my 7 DPO progesterone came back as 23nmol. The doctor says this doesn’t prove ovulation… but everything online says above 16nmol proves ovulation, and that progesterone is pulsatile so changes throughout the day. I have completely regular 28 day cycles and track my ovulation using LH strips, digital LH tests and BBT and have clearly ovulated using these for the last 6 months, including the month I had the bloods. Could the doctor be wrong? I wish I’d seen a fertility specialist and not just my GP now! I’ve been holding onto the fact that regular cycles mean I must ovulate but now I’m freaking out?!

@TaysonicI don’t want to have a dig at our health service as I feel they are so so important and I was looked after incredibly well with both my previous miscarriage and TFMR but I’ll be honest, I do feel disheartened with the care I’ve received at the moment. No offer of blood tests. The scan was performed at a private clinic as EPAU refused to scan before 8 weeks. Private clinic sent a report stating pregnancy of unknown location and advised that EPAU would want to scan to confirm it wasn’t ectopic…but they haven’t. I’ve got a GP appointment tomorrow. I’m bleeding but not as much as I’d have expected and my pain today is mostly on one side and up my back which I didn’t experience last time. It’s such a heartbreaking time and the added frustration of not feeling you’re being listened to just tops it off.

Sorry for bringing the thread down. I hope that you’re all ok and that I’ll get some positivity back again soon. Still very raw at the moment

I am absolutely devastated for you @Fullofconfusion - I am so incredibly sorry. As it's currently a PUL (pregnancy of unknown location), have they offered to do some regular blood tests to check hcg levels? That's what they did with me, it initially confirmed the hcg levels were dropping, but then I had a weird uplift which is when they began to treat it as ectopic. I don't think it actually was ectopic - it was more likely to be a weird lab issue and the hcg rise being within a margin of error but...

It might be worth seeing if they'll do that just for a bit of peace of mind? Difficult though as it involves more medical appointments.

I really wish this has turned out differently for you.

@Fullofconfusion I’m so so sorry 💔 there are no words!

@Fullofconfusion I am so sorry to read that 😪. Life is not fiar sometimes.

@Fullofconfusionabsolutely heart broken for you 😢 you have suffered so much loss. Im truly so sorry this is happening xxx

Oh I'm so sorry to read this @Fullofconfusion🥺 sending you lots of love. So awful and unfair that EPAU wouldn't give you a scan. I'm so sorry 💔 xx

Hi again ladies.

I managed to get a BFP last month and couldn’t believe my luck. Unfortunately I started to bleed midweek. EPAU refused to scan me until I was 8 weeks (I should have been 7) so paid for a private scan to be told that it was a pregnancy of unknown location. They found a small sac only. I’ve continued to bleed and cramp heavier and know I’ve had a miscarriage. I have a scan booked with EPAU in a couple of weeks to confirm if everything has passed. I’m devastated to have had another loss and thinking that it’s just not going to happen for us.

At the moment I’m just resting and getting my head around things and will look to try again once we’re able to.

Hi all. CD9 today. Going to start OPKing tomorrow I think. I usually ovulate around CD15-16.

Hope you're all okay. ❤️

@Iris2024 Oh god yes the celebrity (and non celeb) announcements can be a killer, especially if it was the same month you conceived 😔

not sure where you are in your cycle, but hope you’re doing ok 🙏🏻

Progesterone is so uncomfortable. I am about to start mine tonight.

I did my IUI yesterday so I have started my 2 WW.

@ChaE05 Thanks for your words of reassurance, also would never want to come across as ungrateful either but need to take it a day at a time and try and not panic 😫 I’m booked for a scan at 6 weeks which would be the 19th Feb, im 4 weeks today so still ridiculously early.

Hmm it’s a shame the progesterone has not helped with your spotting, I have always spotted before mine too. I feel like the progesterone is such a big commitment early on too, only been doing mine 4 days and I don’t like it already. Not quite sure how you’re meant to time sex around it, I feel so irritated in that region already. Hopefully your period arrives soon (if it is on its way) and you can start a fresh. I’m sure it’s been extra heavy with you having the letrozole and trigger shot this cycle, so be kind to yourself xx

@Blondepeachunfortunately you probably aren't going to be able to fully relax for a while yet. But its so reassuring your tests are darkening! And your chance of this baby sticking is highter than it not, just keep telling yourself that. The odds are in your favour! Xx

So lovely to hear about your friend and CRP!

My period still hasn't fully started yet. Had that spotting yesterday morning and nothing since! No cramping or anything. Seems exactly the same as previous months, so progesterone hasn't done anything for me! Think it would make more sense to take it from a positive test rather than go through the side effects each month and not get any real benefit xx

@ttcnumerodos yep same, I must think about it every few minutes - not making work very easy. I haven’t had spotting (yet) but I am also on progesterone and read it can cause spotting, so I’m keeping an eye out for that. I’ve been having a weeeeny bit of a crampy discomfort feeling, almost like 5% of a normal period cramp. I wish I was just having no sensations down there to be honest 😅

I'm sorry AF has arrived @ChaE05, I hope you're ok, sending hugs. I try and allow myself a day to really feel sorry for myself then try and get a good kip and fresh start the next day.

I'm exactly the same @Blondepeachcant relax at all. I've wiped pink a few times and I'm just like 'oh well, that's it then 🙄' . Can't concentrate on work at all, I'm so on edge. x

@ChaE05 Oh I’m sorry 😔 big hugs, the months feel x10 longer when ttc, so the marathon of waiting to test and then AF arrive is just horrendous.

Good that your Daye test came back overall very good. I’ve been taking the Zita West Femceive tablets in relation to the vaginal microbiome, think they are pretty much the same as the Optibac ones. I’ve suffered with frequent thrush in the past so always felt my micro biome must be not quite right.

interesting you mentioned the CRP clinic, I live around an hour from there and one of my mums friends had been there after a few chemicals and an ectopic and she now has a baby - so she actually recommended it to me. Financially at the moment it’s not something we could afford so hence why I went down the recurrent miscarriage clinic route for now.

Im 12dpo today and my tests are darkening but I just can’t shake this horrible black cloud of doubt and anxiety over me, any sensation down below I just feel sick and so on edge. I can’t imagine ever feeling ‘safe’ even with a positive test now x