Active discussions

Help protect children from gaming harms.

Take our survey

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Is it to soon to be thinking about another baby???

40 replies

emmabemmasmom · 31/05/2008 09:14

Hi

My DD is nearly 8 months old. I love her to bits and she is the most contented little thing. Now that she is kinda nearing the toddler stage, I am really missing the baby times. (I don't know why!)

Everyone keeps telling us not to have more as my DD is so content, because they say our others will be terrors!

I know you are suppose to wait a year between to let your body have a break too. I don't know if this is just my uterus talking and saying to have another now, or what!

What do I do? confused, baby loving mom

OP posts:
ChippyMinton · 31/05/2008 10:08

Go for it if that's what you want.
Personally I found a close gap works very well - they fight play together, and can do similar activities etc etc.

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 31/05/2008 10:04

Sorry dd decided to bang the lap top

belgo · 31/05/2008 10:03

My two play together sometimes,and fight together! Pretty normal I suspect for two sisters close in age. DD1 is very protective of dd2, which is lovely.

You are in a stable relaltionship, your dh has a good job, you both want another child, you're enjoying being a mother to your dd. There's no reason for you to wait. What your family think isn't really important - there will always be people who agree and disagree with you, you can't please everyone, so you may as well do what's best for yoursleves and please yourselves.

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 31/05/2008 10:03

I think if your both happy about it then go for it. Like someone said it may not happen straight away.
my baby is due in august and there will be nearly 19 months between my dd and the new one.
I dont doubt that it may be difficult sometimes,but as my mum always says if your at home with one might aswell be at home with another. As she had three under 5.Difficult at times but you manage.

I understand about feelinh broody I did almost as soon as I had her. My dh said lets wait until she is about 2 then try again.

But when you see how quickly they grow and change we were more than ready to try sooner rather than later.
Good luck whatever you decide.

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 31/05/2008 10:03

I think if your both happy about it then go for it. Like someone said it may not happen straight away.
my baby is due in august and there will be nearly 19 months between my dd and the new one.
I dont doubt that it may be difficult sometimes,but as my mum always says if your at home with one might aswell be at home with another. As she had three under 5.Difficult at times but you manage.

I understand about feelinh broody I did almost as soon as I had her. My dh said lets wait until she is about 2 then try again.

But when you see how quickly they grow and change we were more than ready to try sooner rather than later.
Good luck whatever you decide.

Original poster
emmabemmasmom · 31/05/2008 09:59

Belgo: Are your two close? It is also hard to try and get the timing right so your DC are close (friend wise). My mom and my aunt are 7 years apart and my DH and his sister are 4 years apart and neither are close, and I don't want that.

Maybe I am picturing perfect movie families where everyone is all close and lovey

Also I was an only child growing up (until I was 19 but my sister is more like mine than a sister) and I don't want my DD to go through that even though I am sure there will be times that she would rather be an only one.

And I know my DH would have an entire football team if I would let him

OP posts:
Original poster
emmabemmasmom · 31/05/2008 09:54

Yeah she is crawling and pulling herself up on things already. She is a handful in that sense and I always have to keep an eye on her. She is talking (just 'hi' and 'dada') and has two teeth and all of a sudden I see her going off to college! She is just growing up so fast.

I don't want to have another one purly because I miss being able to hold my DD all day so I want a replacement. She is becoming independent and it is hard. So that is why I am kinda having issues and want to make sure that if I do try, I am doing it for the right reasons.

OP posts:
cupsoftea · 31/05/2008 09:53

Don't know if it's hereditary but would ask your doc.

Once on the move they are more work but really imho there never is the right time to have another child but just the time when it happened.

belgo · 31/05/2008 09:52

I have an 18 month gap between my two. I don't regret it - it was hard work and some times I wish they were a little further apart in age - but it's been well worth it. I really don't see why you should wait if you want another baby so badly.

Also, I became pregnant very easily with my first two babies. But it's taken me a year to become successfully pregnant with dc3, so fertility can be very unpredictable.

I don't see any reason why you should wait if both you and your dh are happy to try again.

Original poster
emmabemmasmom · 31/05/2008 09:50

Exactly which is why I am kinda thinking to try now?

My mom has a lot of infertility issues, and I don't know if it runs in families or not. She had me at 18 and didn't have my sister until she was 38, after a lot of trying and then finally In Vitro. Hopefully not TMI but we both have weird uteruses and cervixes. Both of ours are off to the side and our cervixes are like behind where they should be. I didn't know she was like that too until my Dr told me I was and then she told me she was too. She also has endometriosis which I don't know if that is hereditary or not.

For obvious reasons, I don't want to wait to long and then have all the hardship and tears my mom had to go through and then to be told that is it.

Because DD one was a suprise, I have never had to go through the thinking it through stage. So I am finding it difficult.

OP posts:
JamesAndTheGiantBanana · 31/05/2008 09:49

is she crawling about yet? I only ask because some of us who currently have 9-10 month old babies on the august 2007 thread are finding it quite difficult, the babies are constantly on the lookout for trouble they can get into, and apparently this nothing-is-safe stage lasts for quite a while according to friends with older children. If you're a coper, I say go for it, but I wouldn't want to be pg again just yet, personally, this stage is exhausting enough already!

cupsoftea · 31/05/2008 09:40

sorry to say this - but you might not get preg staight away.

Original poster
emmabemmasmom · 31/05/2008 09:38

If I went with how I feel at this moment I would be calling my H and telling him to come home right now to try

However, I know that having a baby is a big thing and not something just to do on a spur of the moment which is why I am trying to be rational (trying)

My DD was an accident to be honest. I was on the pill and got pregnant 2 months after the wedding. Even though we are in our mid 20's and married...it was not looked upon as a good thing from our family. We made it work and changed our goals and she is the best thing that has happened to us.

My H has a great job and we are looking for our first house so I know that on that side of things we can handle it.

I loved being pregnant and I look forward to actually trying for the next one (not for the obvious reasons! ) I also know my H wants more and would be very happy to try now. We had talked a few months ago and decided to wait until next summer when she will be almost 2. I just don't think I want to wait that long and neither does he I don't think. Although I know our families would not be very happy about it...but it is for us, not them.

I hope I am making sense, cause at the moment it is hard to. I either want to go with my heart which says to have another, or my head which is saying wait a bit.

OP posts:
cupsoftea · 31/05/2008 09:27

go with how your feel

posieflump · 31/05/2008 09:26

honeslty?
I would wait until she's one before making a decision
8 months isn't the toddler stage!
wait until she's moving around more and see how you feel
my sister got pregnant at 9 months though and it all worked out fine although she does find 2 boys 18 months apart very hard work