TTC#1 - Looking for Others in the Same Boat PART TWO THE SEQUEL WHERE WE ALL GET OUR BABIES???!

I think you would definitely be able to work to that timeline then @MocktailMe!! If you don’t end up conceiving naturally in the meantime. It would be great to bank some embryos too. I wish we had been more successful in that regard but I’ll take what I can get. And I totally agree about being eased into the bad news. I would hate to spend 2 weeks thinking I might be pregnant only to be devastated with my period. I know some people also don’t test after transfer and wait until the blood test but I can’t imagine how hard that must be to hear it hasn’t worked so late on.

Next steps for me are they will scan me in my clinic at around 7 weeks and then if all looks ok they will discharge me to my obstetrician. I thought there would be more oversight by the clinic but that seems to be all I get!

Fingers crossed for you @CharLdn🤞🤞I can completely relate about not wanting to do another year of shagging 🤣 I joked to my husband after the transfer being like god that was so much easier haha.

I’m sorry your CD 1 has arrived @MocktailMealthough once I get that late negative test I'm just ready for my period to arrive so I hope you’re at least glad to be moving onto the next cycle. It’s certainly reasonable to expect to do your first transfer by Christmas if your appointment is soon. For context I had my first consultation with the fertility doctor on May 8 and my transfer was August 7. I did go privately though, I’m not sure what you’re thinking but that does accelerate timelines

Aww yay @Waitingformiracle one step closer ❤️

Sorry for BFN @MocktailMe all this waiting is what kills me too.

I’m currently in my wait - I only ovulated day 18 so think I should only have a 10 day wait…

I’ve got an appointment on the 8th Sept to discuss next steps but at this stage I’m leaning towards ivf sooner rather than later because I just don’t have the patience for another year of shagging and waiting in me.

It’s so frustrating when you’re throwing the kitchen sink at it to not get pregnant especially when you have been before. Our method now is to cover a wider window but it’s a long slog.

@MocktailMe I’m really glad that I offer a bit of hope with my story, not that I am anywhere near out of the woods but the way I see it is even if this doesn’t work out I know that ivf can get me a positive test which is more than I’ve had in a long time. And yes absolutely, it’s just the cycle of the egg retrieval and then the cycle of the transfer (if doing frozen) that you can’t try naturally, so definitely just look at it as a supplement to your existing TTC plan. Plus if you did get a few embryos to bank, it’s an insurance policy for the future too which always appealed to me (although we didn’t get any to bank this time but we will hopefully get more in the future).

Thank you very much @Tater05 😊

Amazing news @Waitingformiracle, so happy to hear that! Such a good strong start to have.

Sorry to hear it's yet another BFN @MocktailMe. The last few days waiting for AF to arrive really are the worst! And always so frustrating when you know you've done everything 'right'. It sounds like you're in a pretty good headspace though. Still, try and make sure you do something nice for yourself if AF does arrive ♥️

Thank you @MocktailMe and thank you for thinking of me and checking in, I really appreciate it ❤️

I’m sorry to hear about your BFN. It’s just so disheartening each cycle when you’ve done everything right. Allow yourself these few days to feel sad and treat yourself to some nice things, and before you know it fertile week will be here again. That’s what I always do and I find it helps a bit

@MocktailMe so sorry I totally blanked on updating you all! We got a good strong beta result 🥹 886 which they said is super for 11 days post transfer. I’m so thrilled. I’ve booked a private test for tomorrow just to see if it’s doubling, as my clinic doesn’t offer a second one. How are you doing?

Thank you @MocktailMe. Beta is all done and I should hear back between 1-3 🤞🤞 it was such a nice experience the nurse gave me the biggest hug, they really do all get so excited for their patients. Easy to forget sometimes that this is the whole point of it all. I didn’t mention that I had taken about 100 tests already 😅

@MocktailMe I’m get that. They might also just think that that’s the right thing to be saying and I’m sure if you did end up doing it they would be supportive. And you have all of us to cheer you on no matter what you decide to do! And thank you so much, I’m going in shortly so I’ll let you all know 🙏 x

@Waitingformiracle wise words!
@MocktailMe my consultant said it’s the fastest and most effective way of getting pregnant.

My apprehension with TTC ‘naturally’ is that it’s a lot of effort and personal responsibility (obsessively timed sex/ 10,000 supplements, daily testing) is I’m worried it will take ANOTHER 18 months to get pregnant and at my age it’s only a 12% chance per cycle.

I also think with IVF - I’m not too scared about the jabs it’s more the hope/disappointment cycles around numbers of eggs embryos etc. But the attractive thing for me about ivf is there’s a clear process and timeline plus about a 30% chance each cycle.

No one wants to have to do IVF and it’s so frustrating our bodies haven’t done what we need to do but it is the next best chance to get what we want. Many feelings can exist at the same time and we need to give ourselves grace we’ve got this far ❤️

You are not alone in feeling all the feelings it’s a bloody long slog!

@MocktailMe and that’s such a valid feeling to feel, like doing it is accepting defeat I totally get that. I didn’t take any offense whatsoever in what you said btw in case it came across like that, I just wanted to allay your worries a bit if I can having been through it. I was really putting off starting it and I remember the thing that gave me the final push was I went to talk to my parents and I kind of told them (feeling like such a failure) that we might need to do IVF and they were like that is BRILLIANT why are you holding off why not start now? And I was so taken aback, I thought they’d be sort of ashamed or something. But they were so encouraging and I think I sort of needed to hear someone make it into not a big deal? Like my dad was pretty much like stop overthinking it just do it and after that I just went for it. The other thing I would say is that the process is SO slow with plenty of months to try naturally in between. So starting the process doesn’t mean you stop trying naturally, and my friend just got pregnant naturally in the middle of the process as she was about to start doing stims for her egg retrieval!

@MocktailMe I wouldn’t see doing IVF as giving up or failing. I more see it as brave and a sign of how strong someone is to go through that. I’ll proudly tell my kids how they were conceived because they will know how much they were wanted. The way I see it, I got pregnant naturally and carried that baby for 18 weeks and my body failed me then, so conceiving naturally doesn’t really give me the comfort it once did. Honestly my only regret about IVF is not starting it sooner. But that’s just my personal experience and it is of course a deeply personal decision. It’s obviously not a walk in the park, but after all you’ve been through I think you’d be well able. I certainly found that it wasn’t half as hard as losing my baby and the struggles of infertility. Anyway I just wanted to make you feel better about it if you do choose to do it, that it’s not some terrible thing that you should be ashamed about doing. It’s amazing and millions of children are born from it every year.

@Tater05 that’s great yay ❤️

@MocktailMe I really feel your pain I had a big wobble this week it’s all so long and boring and so deeply unfair. They say that 55% of people going through infertility experience depression and I really get why.

We’re currently deciding wether or not to go down the ivf route and have a consultant appointment booked for the 8th Sept - I just want to know if because we got pregnant it’s worth carrying on trying naturally for longer or to just crack on… I’m 36 and just feel like I’m not getting any younger but also ivf does feel big and scary.

@Tater05 Happy to hear the first scan went well, indeed the first milestone ✔️ . Will your next one be a 12 week scan or are you doing earlier private ones too?
One step at a time of course! Hope you are enjoying your pregnancy and not worrying too much! No sickness?
@Waitingformiracle Such a relief that the tests are progressing so far, good luck with the bloods on Monday too! 🤞
@MocktailMe Your feelings are totally valid. Two years does seem like an eternity and I can only imagine how I would drive myself crazy, especially with the age pressure not on my side!
I hope when the ball starts rolling on the IVF route you will feel a bit more uplifted. And who knows, you can still keep trying naturally, right?!
The good thing is you still have your eggs, so a little intervention doesn't mean your body has failed you! X

Congratulations @Tater05 that’s wonderful news ☺️