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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Anyone else trying to get pregnant 2

294 replies

bayleaf · 20/12/2002 20:51

It may just be my computer ( no broad band in the sticks!)but the other thread was taking a long while to load and accept new messages so maybe we can start again here...

OP posts:
elliott · 10/02/2003 13:31

just wondering how those of you trying the old-fashioned way(!) are doing? WWW? who else?

dot1 · 10/02/2003 11:44

Hi Bayleaf - I've been away for a week but just wanted to say hello and sorry it didn't work this time - me and dp were thinking about you - lots of luck for March.

WideWebWitch · 07/02/2003 23:14

bayleaf, me too. We're all rooting for you.

Ruth21 · 07/02/2003 23:12

Have been offline for a few days, and was wondering how you were getting on, bayleaf. Very sorry to hear it didn't work--I hope it goes better next time. So frustrating to have to wait, though.

mindy · 05/02/2003 13:37

bayleaf,
so sorry to hear your ivf cycle failed, having gone through it a couple of times I know how stressful the whole thing is, particularly if not telling many people.

On my first attempt I got severe OHSS - nearly 50 eggs!! So no implant, all suitable embeyoes frozen.
My first attempt then with frozen did not work but the second did.
My recollections were that the FET were easier on the drug front - it was a matter of getting your body in a position to accept the embreyo as opposed to the whole egg production first as well. It was also much quicker.

After first failed attempt we told no-one we were trying again, on 2nd Ivf cycle for second child I told 2 close friends - dp and I found it easier that way.

Good luck to you and elliot,
mindy x

Original poster
bayleaf · 05/02/2003 12:46

I completely understand how you think elliott - at the begining I was TOTALLY terrified at the prospect of twins - and now I feel completely different. I expect if I talk to my consultant about it he'll tell me it's an acknowledged ivf syndrome - your feelings about twins are in direct proportion to how many failed attempts you've had!!!
It may sound daft but I think you're really lucky to be starting ivf soon enough to honestly WANT ( sort of) it to work second time not first - being a year further on from you makes it very different for me.
Yes it is a complete nightmare making provision for looking after ds/dd - especially if you haven't told many people as I hadn't.

I admit that I know very little about FET and whether they'll want me to take any drugs at all - hopefully all questions will be answered on Friday.

OP posts:
elliott · 05/02/2003 10:07

Bayleaf, that must have been a bit of a sting in the tail, having the news about the chemical pregnancy. Just when you want to move on and look forward.
But MArch is really no time at all - you might even complete your next cycle before I do!! Will it be a natural cycle FET? I don't know much about FET procedures as its never been relevant.

Oh, and I won't have a word said against November babies

But honestly I do feel very much in two minds about this cycle - I am genuinely quite freaked at the possibility of another one so soon (even more freaked by the idea of twins!!) although I imagine I will feel rather different if/when it doesn't work. The next time (which I'm planning for summer) will be a different matter, as it will be closer to what I would have chosen as an age gap, and also I'm not sure if we can afford or cope with a third attempt after that. But I'm getting ahead of myself here. At the moment I'm finding it quite stressful just thinking about fitting it all in with work and ds - lots of complicated childcare arrangements, slight panic about how to do stims when dh is away and I have ds to look after, etc etc.

Marina · 04/02/2003 18:57

Oh Bayleaf, I'm so sorry to hear your misgivings this time were confirmed and feel if anyone on the planet deserved that tart and that chocolate, then you did. I really hope that March brings success, and like the others here, I goggle at your good humour and resilience through all of this. Your family and pupils are jolly lucky to have you!

Original poster
bayleaf · 04/02/2003 18:56

Hmm - that made me smile elliott - actually our strategies aren't so differnt - I never try and convince myself that it'll work when I'm doing it, far from it, that'd make me far too vulnerable - I just try and find a positive side to everything - exactly as you are doing- ie if it doesn't work this time it's not so bad because .... It was hard this time because I actually WOULD have liked a baby in early October - the next 3 months are 'easy' as who wants a Nov/Dec/Jan baby??? I'd certainly never choose it so I can put a positive spin on having to wait over the next few months - but the only thing I could think this time was ''oh well at least I'll be able to start my new job share on time in September instead of going on maternity leave exactly as it starts!''

I had a bit of a blip this afternoon I had the official phone call and apparently I did have a 'chemical pregnancy' ( ie it implanted and briefly started to produce hcg but never progressed) which made me all emotional as it somehow made it worse to have got so close but not made it - PLUS it means that I've got to be late for work yet again as I'll need another test even though she admitted there was no chance of it ever being a viable pregnancy. Then within 10 minutes of this - and still red eyed I had to pick up dd from the childminder where she goes for a few hours on a Tuesday - only for her to hold on to the childminder's legs saying her name and not want to come to me. She LOVES the childminder but has never ever done anything like this before and I'm sure you can imagine it was NOT what I needed. Heaven only knows what the childminder thought - I just had to grab her protesting and stuff her in the car before I burst into tears again myself....The logical part of me knows it's probably to do with her dropping her midday nap ( as of this weekend)and beign over-tired but the rational part of me isn't completely in control at the moment

OP posts:
Jane101 · 04/02/2003 16:20

Bayleaf - sorry to hear it hasn't worked, what a shame. I'm sure it's worse with IVF, after all you have to go through each time. Don't worry about the name mix-up, it's confusing trying to add a message without being able to see the one you're responding to. I hope things go well for you in March.

elliott · 04/02/2003 14:45

Sorry to hear your news bayleaf. Hope your dd is proving a welcome distraction and blessing at this time.

I've ages to go yet - only about a week into down-reg. Keep forgetting to take it on time, but it seems to be working as I'm bleeding again, so I hope all will happen on schedule. My coping strategy is a bit different from yours though - I am busy convincing myself that it won't work and rationalising why that won't be such a bad thing (who wants siblings with birthdays within a week of each other anyway? )

Batters · 04/02/2003 14:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bells2 · 04/02/2003 14:06

Bayleaf, I admire your strength and attitude so much. I really hope you succeed soon.

CookieMonster · 04/02/2003 11:56

Bayleaf,
I have been thinking about you over the last couple of days and wondering if your absence meant the news wasn't good .... I am SO sorry to hear that confirmed but I think your positive attitude is fantastic. OK, so you wallowed for a short while, but you are quite entitled to that and you sound so upbeat now.
It's unfortunate that you have wait till March when you are in a position to get straight into frozen embryo transfer this month (if your consultant is anything like mine was, he's away in foreign parts on some freebie conference!) but just use the time in between to strengthen your resolve that it WILL work ...
Best wishes ... CM

Elliot,
what news? Everything OK?

tigermoth · 04/02/2003 11:06

bayleaf, you deserve a medal.

I so hope the March meeting and frozen embryo method leads to a baby for you. Sorry I can't talk about this in a more informed way, since I know so little about it, I know it's not just about science, it's also about your feelings.

Take lots of care
tigermoth X

Original poster
bayleaf · 04/02/2003 10:01

Hi all
Firstly can I apologise Jane101 for calling you Janeway further down the board? - I'm not sure how /why I did that - I only just noticed now and thought how wierd it was.
Unfortunately I'm not the bearer of glad tidings -tho the smiley is not a mistake as I'm feeling fine now. I've waited a couple of days to post until I am through the worst of the self pity and frustration. I've realised from Friday onwards that it hadn't worked - that was day 12 post transfer and most ivfers seem to ahve a positive by then if they are going to get one - so over the weekend I gradually came to terms with it not having worked again. I had a good cry, ate a LOAD of chocolate ( and a whole M&S pecan toffee tart!) and by Sunday afternoon I was feeling much better (and not a little fatter!)and more positive about it all.
I know myself well enough to know that allowing myself to wallow is NOT good for me and I need to concentrate hard on the good things in my life, things where I feel blessed, and to look to the future and find out what I can do to make it work next time!
I've got an appointment to see the Dr on Friday and will discuss a frozen cycle in March ( he's away this month) as we've got 13 embryos frozen now and a frozen transfer is only about £850. (£7,000 in to treatment you start to think 'ooch!'

Elliott - how are you feeling - you must be nearly there now? Any side effects?
Jane101 - I can imagine how frustating is is to have to cancel again - I'm finding it hard to see a positive side to the fact that I have to wait till March to carry on, I feel as though. I can cope with however long it takes as long as I can keep going - it's the treading water in between that drives me mad.

I've been this morning to do the official pregnancy test and bizarrely whilst sitting waiting two friends walked in! They're peope we only see about once a year - and I knew they'd had fertility problems and presumed by now they had given up ( they're 40) but it turns out as the problem is a sperm one they had been told 10 years ago there was no hope - but in the light of improvements in icsi they'd decided to give it one last go - it feels like a really small world!

OP posts:
janinlondon · 03/02/2003 15:05

Thanks Jane101. Clomid is not an option for me. My lining went way down on it. And injectibles are a nightmare because no matter how low a dose they give me I get OHSS and end up in hospital. And there's always one follicle WAAY out in front and they have to decide to either go with it or let it fly and wait for the others. So a drugless regimen seems the only way. I wish I could find the right protocol! Good luck with the LH ovary - maybe next month?

Jane101 · 02/02/2003 21:01

Well, I had a scan on Friday and found out I'm ovulating from my right ovary (again) - which was bad news because I've only got one fallopian tube - on the left side. Apparently it could still work even if I ovulate on the "wrong" side, but the chance is reduced, so we decided not to go ahead. I'm disapointed, rather than heartbroken - there's always next month. Still, it wasn't the best weekend for me to find out that 2 of my friends are pregnant. I really am genuinely pleased for them, but...

Anyway, Janinlondon, we're being treated by CARE at the Three Shires Hospital in Northampton. Like you, I usually ovulate fine on my own, so don't really see the point of clomid, but we have used it in the past, and I can see us trying it again, because it ups the chances - I had 2 follicles last time we used it, and the hope is that at least one will be on the left side (unfortunately both were on the right last time). Also, I got a bit worried about the idea of twins, as we already have a 2 year old. As far as Profasi goes, I'm not sure if it would help your weekend problem (I think our clinic does Sat. mornings though). As I understand it, they aren't really trying to change the time I ovulate. They use scans and blood tests to predict when it will naturally occur and then use the Profasi just to make extra sure.

elliott · 01/02/2003 19:10

bayleaf, I've been away for a few days, but just logged back on to let you know I'm thinking of you. Did you try a test yet? Always tricky to know whether to test at the earliest possible moment or wait until its more likely to be conclusive.
Let us know how you are..

Original poster
bayleaf · 30/01/2003 16:23

Oh thanks for that Marina, and for the symptomless pregnancies, I defintely need to hear things like that - and I'm defintely feeling better today, if only becasue I know that tomorrow morning is about the first morning that I can test with any real expectation of a result. Admittedly a negative result won't in any way be conclusive - but just getting to this point feels like such progress - if need be at least I can start to get on with the week or so of being mega pissed off and then get on with life again - or of course the alternative too wonderful to mention!

OP posts:
Marina · 30/01/2003 14:26

Some on this thread might find today's Mumsnet Fact of the Day amusing. Any excuse to torment a man with a sponge full of icy water...

tigermoth · 30/01/2003 13:39

good luck bayleaf - just to echo marina, I only felt pregnant a few days after I had missed my first period. Second time around, when I knew what 'pregnant' felt like, the sore breasts/bloated middle/sickness definitely kicked in all of a sudden.

Marina · 30/01/2003 10:59

Jane101, good luck next week. Your quote from Clockwise summed up how I feel right now! Do hope it works for you this time, and that, Bayleaf, your body is just keeping you a little in suspense...both my pregnancies had quite a sudden start to symptoms just after I was due, so there's always a gleam of hope. The number of crossed digits up and down the country must have some impact! Glad you are finding Mumsnet a support, don't know what we'd all do without it.

janinlondon · 30/01/2003 09:51

Jane101, can I ask where you are doing your IUI? I had a successful IUI four years ago but that was on Mega drugs, and I really don't want to go down that route again. I produce one nice little egg each cycle. The only trouble is I keep ovulating on weekends. If we could do a profasi shot it would give us a better chance at timing. But I'm not sure if there's a clinic in London that would agree to this. They don't tend to like women writing their own protocols!

CookieMonster · 30/01/2003 09:06

Bayleaf, I know just how awful these 2 weeks are but please please don't give up hope yet. I never had any symptoms at all and yet had a positive test at the end of the two weeks. Keep your chin up and in the meantime I'm sending you lots of cyberhugs ...
Jane101, good luck for next week - hope it's third time lucky!