I’m 48 and want to have a baby

At 48 it is possible. But over 90% of pregnancies at this age result in miscarriage. So really there's no point getting pregnant is there. Its not like there will be other chances so if you do fall pregnant, then you will most likely lose it anyway. And that will leave you feeling even worse I should imagine.

To be fair though I think the body issues are much more to do with dropping oestrogen levels in menopause than the actual pregnancy. I had my DD at 36 then went through early menopause and my body is as your describe your friends, it sucks!

My friend had a baby at 50. She went to Spain for IVF and used donor eggs. It cost £7,000 8 years ago. She had every pregnancy complication you can get and delivered the baby by elective c section. She will be the first to admit that her body has been massively damaged. Her breasts are down by her waist and the skin on her stomach didn't go back so she has a large apron of skin hanging down . Her sex life has died as a result. The child I physically healthy but very odd.

Completely agree. Some really harsh comments here, a bit of compassion never hurt anyone.

This is so important for OP to see,I have my grandchild every weekday while her mum and dad work and that's exhausting enough.I'm the same age as OP.

How rude. My Aunt (by marriage) is an only child whose mother was late 40s when she had her. No other older siblings in that equation.

Do you think it would be wise to go ahead getting pregnant?

No.

It's hormones doing the talking most likely. I really, really don't think it would be wise to do this for many reasons.

Just because some men do it doesn't mean that's one of the things women should aspire to. Those men tend to have much younger wives to actually have the baby and do the looking after of the baby.

I had to take on custody of 2 grandchildren at 48. One was 16 months, the other from birth. Dear God it nearly killed me. The broken nights, constant attention etc. even now, they’re 4 and 5 I’m just permanently exhausted.

I think if you can conceive naturally, and you've thought through all the age and non agree related risks and how you plan to manage these (NIPT, termination for medical reason), and thought hard about why you want another baby now (HRT may be a better option than pregnancy!!), then give it a go if it's what you want, but don't be surprised if it doesn't happen.

I know someone who had her last baby at 47…..he had complex disabilities ……she’s 65 now……she will never know the freedom of retirement that many have…..she is unable to be a hands on granny as her own child demands her attention ……did she regret it ever? I don’t know, I never asked

You would be retired before your child reached 18. You'd be in your 50s with a toddler and in your 60s with an adolescent. Get a grip, OP!

It is not impossible to get pregnant in your late 40s. I had my last when I was nearly 48 and she has been an absolute delight.

However, I would describe finding myself pregnant as a "lovely surprise" rather than a firm plan- but then you can't absolutely plan these things at any age.

The pregnancy was ok other than me having gestational diabetes (managed with very careful diet) and a tendency to chest infection - so I took maternity leave a bit earlier than planned.

I am retired now and love that I have time to spend with my teen and tween.

I also have only just hit menopause; my mum also was very late to menopause, and I think that is strongly associated with the possibility of pregnancy at a slightly older age, for obvious reasons.

I think a lot of people have outdated info/views about fertility. Yes, many women would be able to have babies into their late 40's in theory - it's just most aren't trying to!
Also recently there was a metanalysis of many studies done that showed that the odds of older mums having a baby with chromosomal disorder are likely overblown.
I believe that having a thyroid condition is one of the things that can make falling pregnant and staying pregnant harder at any age though, OP, sadly.
Any woman that is healthy enough to fall pregnant naturally in their forties (and carry that pregnancy to term) is likely to be in great health and according to many studies, will have significantly greater chance of longevity.
I think donor egg pregnancies/IVF pregnancies at advanced ages are a very different kettle of fish - but I wouldn't criticise anyone for taking that route.

Personally i think you are just panicking. Wait for the Grandchildren.

Im afraid I agree with this. Imagine you don't conceive til your 50? It's not fair on the child. Or on your existing children really.

Except it's not just about her, is it?

It's about her unborn child who is more likely to be born with a disability and who will be at a higher risk of losing their parent before they reach adulthood.

No love, you don’t want a baby. This is your hormones doing their last hurrah. Sounds like you have two lovely children and have already mothered them for many years. You’ve had that experience and enjoyed it I’m sure and were a great mum. It’s time to gently let go of that now and move into the next stage. Don’t be dragged back.

No, you need to put that idea out of your head, OP. It wouldn't be fair on the new baby or on your other children.

I think those hormonal surges that make us want more children are really common at your age. I had them too. You have to do what's best for your family, though, and I really think having another baby, with all the problems that would probably bring, isn't what's best for you or the baby or the other children.

You may well be a grandmother soon. I'm pretty sure that yearning is the reason why so many mothers try to push their children into have babies.

And how’s that going for her?

Not fair when they are older.

Do you have a partner?

Do you work?

Can you fund IVF privately?

You’ll be 49/50 when you give birth. I couldn’t do it. I am 50 now.

Getting pregnant naturally at 48 is very hard. If you really want another child you will need fertility treatment, ideally with donor eggs. This is quite costly so I hope you have enough to support this.

I adopted a three year old at 49 so it is not impossible to be a mum to a child at a later age.

I think it does help we are financially OK and my dh is very supportive.

Just curious but why now, why didn't you think about it a few years ago.

Good luck.

The chance of you conceiving and then not miscarrying are way less than 1%. I'm sorry OP, you have to be realistic.

Sounds like a terrible idea to be honest.

If you need anymore convincing I suggest you borrow a friend or relatives child and take them out to soft play for a few hours. You'll soon change your mind