TTC after loss part 5

I'm doing okay thank you. Had another episode of brown discharge last week but the EPU kindly squeezed me in and all was fine with the baby.

I'm 19 weeks today! I have my 20 week scan next Tuesday x

That's a good gestation for a scan, remember what you've always told me - this is a completely new pregnancy and the odds are in your favour ❤️ I'm sure it feels like a lifetime between now and then but it'll come round xx

Sending you all hugs. It’s such an anxious time isn’t it.

I’ve been quiet on here but almost 6 weeks now and have a scan booked in for Thursday 29th. I’ve managed to keep fairly calm so far but feeling so worried now that it’s getting closer.

Our early scan was when we first knew things may not be progressing as planned last time around (ended in MMC) so keeping everything crossed.

Hope you’re all doing ok x

@Ella31 I’m doing OK thanks. Back in the quagmire of should I quit TTC / or push ahead with all of the risk it entails. I don’t think I’ll ever have an answer. I’ve started taking folic acid though!

@Ella31 you’ve got this, and going from strength to strength. Keeping you (and everyone going through early days of pregnancy) in my thoughts. I hope you have some mini goals to focus your mind on to drown out the worry but I know that’s easier said than done.

@Ella31 I’m so sorry to read what you have been through. You are incredibly strong. I am wishing the very best for you xx

After a week of being super super anxious, I have decided to let go and trust my body. There is nothing I can do and everything is beyond my control so I find it easier to let go finally. Yes, the anxiety will still be with you however please enjoy this new pregnancy and be positive.💖

I wish you lots of good luck! ❤ I know it might be hard to trust your body however it is the only way for you to reconnect yourself to this new pregnancy. x

@Ella31 We're all rooting for you! Did you get your second HCG results?
Pregnancy after loss is terrifying. I'm 6 weeks tomorrow and woke up today with a feeling of panic that something was wrong and I was going to loose this one too... Time is going so slow...

Thanks again for the lovely welcome, everyone! Such a warm and supportive thread.

@Figtree11 I’ve been training 3 months now, though that’s more park runs during the week and slightly longer runs during the weekend. Apparently if you run half of the intended race distance in training, you can run the rest, though I think it’s more psychological. Some people don’t train much and still get through the entire race distance.

It’s really hard seeing pregnant friends and seeing their journey play out while TTC. It’s incredibly brave of you to see them as I’m the opposite. Friends of DP told us they were pregnant on the day we got a BFN in front of a group of people, I wanted to run away, hide and scream.

The feelings of conflict of being happy for them and sadness for us not being pregnant is rubbish. However, I’d like to think we’re in this novel where our stories are yet to be written. We’re extra special, the writer is giving us more thought and care.

@Superscientist I’m so sorry you’re going through this right now. Time and waiting is frustrating. I wish I could offer something helpful - just be gentle with yourself and continue to acknowledge how you’re feeling.

@moosey89 yep, I’m going to try and just look out for EWCM as an indicator. BBT and OPKs send me crazy.

@CurlyWurly1991 yeah you fully understand them 😂 I hate it when people say stuff like "just don't track it and see what happens" - yeah I can tell you that outcome thanks haha

@moosey89 we do self insemination as well - I totally hear you!

@CurlyWurly1991 it's definitely worth asking the question anyway, just tell them the fact you've been trying for a year and have irregular cycles. They may not ask about the miscarriages, you never know! And I get what you mean, it's a lot. We don't have the choice but to plan as we do home artificial insemination, I think if I was in a couple that regularly had sex and didn't have any issues in that regard then I'd be going down the "not preventing" route right now for a break x

@CadoAvo booking holidays has helped me too with the due dates…. First loss EDD has just passed and the second is early Nov. We are going on holiday just before that one. However the holidays we had booked caused me some stress last time
I was pregnant as I get a lot of first trimester nausea, anxiety etc. The earliest we will start TTC again (if at all) will be early oct because of the holiday we have booked.

I know what you mean, it's so hard to not think about the loss. I do feel like time has helped my overall feelings however If I hadn't lost my first in April then I'd be 27 weeks now, which seems unbelievable really as it feels like time goes so fast when you're not pregnant. I sometimes wonder what my bump would look like, what sex the baby was etc.

My would be due date in November might be hard but we are going to book a holiday to Morocco for early Nov so that should help I reckon. We haven't managed to get away this year yet as was waiting to see what would happen with ttc etc