First Timers - slightly depressing question

Hi

I know exactly what you all mean.

I'm 38 and started 5 months ago to TTC#1. Only met the right man 18 months ago.

I also have endometriosis and the first blood test I had last month said I didn't ovulate. So am thoroughly depressed by it all and ABSOLUTELY convinced that I will never conceive. Just can't imagine ever getting that positive HPT.

Got to have another blood test next week (although again this month there are no other signs that I've ovulated) and waiting for DP sperm test results.

I know I haven't been trying long at all, I appreciate 5 months is nothing compared with most people on this site so I apologise for whinging, it's just how I feel.

I really hope it doesn't get to the stage where my consultant says the only option is IVF because I really don't think we can afford it.

In some ways I regret that I've left it so late to try but then I don't think I really had an option - at the end of the day I'd rather be with the right man with no children than have children but stuck with the wrong man IYSWIM

Good luck to everyone

I know what you mean, I'm trying, but I just can't quite see myself there.

I'm going to hit 32 in July. I remember being 26, newly married and just having moved here, and discussion about babies being postponed until we'd been married at least 3 years. It all seemed so easy then, just assumed it would all work out and there was plenty of time. I spent nearly half my life trying NOT to get PG--the joke being that all along I had PCOS and I probably never needed to be as worried as I was!

My GP told me just before 30 that I really needed to start trying in case I needed help to conceive. That was the first time I really started to wonder if it would ever happen.

Now I'm newly divorced, engaged again, and hoping being with a new partner who actually likes sex will make a difference. But somehow, I just can't see it happening. DP and I are both broody as anything, but it's so hard to imagine being pregnant and having one of our own!

I'm with you all on this one - though I feel much more confident now than I did a few months ago. About this time last year (when we were facing the 18 month mark) I really started to wonder if kids were just not meant to be for me and DH. My DSis is the maternal one - she did babysitting/child development gcse/holiday work in a nursery etc and I was much more take it or leave it when it came to passing the cousins' babies around the room (I was too scared they'd cry when I held them!). BUT I have discovered the switch that herby mentions and now I can't see myself without a child - it's such an overpowering desire to be a mum. I can picture being pg and having a LO around. I think a lot of that is because I have spend more and more time with DGodS and I have 'practiced' with him (including making some mistakes).
Hang in there, there are bad patches along the ttc road, but there are easier bits too.
I have the CD lottie mentions - it's very good at getting you to think of your future child.
When tryingnottoobsess says "How can something that happens accidentally to so many people be so flippin elusive for some of us?!" I know! Sometimes I just want to shout at people who seem so casual about getting pg!

I know just what you mean. I think.

I'd never even considered children. They didn't interest me, and I didn't even like them all that much. Then I reached my late 30s, and at the same time met DP, and my biological clock sprang into action. It was an entirely non-logical, non-intellectual feeling, and entirely driven by some mysterious force within. Fortunately for me, I got pregnant easily. Unfortunately for me I then lost all four pregnancies, all after 11 weeks, just when the baby was beginning to seem real. With each one the urge to get pregnant again has been stronger and stronger, but it's a kind of biological urge, as well as the urge to do all the kiddy things. I'm now looking into adoption, too, which will scratch one itch, but not the other...

I don't suppose anyone can imagine themselves with a child - they just arrive, and you have to cope! It's no surprise PND is so common... what an upheaval.

Hi Londonlottie, sorry you're in this boat too. Can I ask what the name of the hypnotherapy CD is? I'd be interested in giving something like that a go. Apart from anything, it sounds quite relaxing, and I feel far from relaxed at the mo!

Hi Pre-pg, yeah I totally agree. At the moment it feels like the impossible dream. How can something that happens accidentally to so many people be so flippin elusive for some of us?! The whole thing is totally spinning me out!