CD1 ttc after loss carry on thread #3

Yes, ordered some proper tests and got all positives. I feel strangely calm. I know it could lead to another mmc and when we get towards the 12 week I may not be quite so calm but I'm going to try and just take it 1 day at a time. I think we're going to pay for the nipt test this time too.

@ThelastRolo20 reminders of the other life you might have been living are really hard, especially when your hormones are haywire mid-AF. I think you’ve done amazingly well to be so patient with pausing TTC, I’m really hoping that the break, holiday, vitamins you’ve been taking and letting your hair down with a few drinks stands you in good stead for when you start again ❤️

@Wise0wl I'm okay thank you, felt a bit off today though. I'm in full swing of AF and my friend mentioned she's starting mat leave early May (I was due late April) so it all felt rather rubbish.

4 weeks Friday we're off, slowly getting there x

@ThelastRolo20 I could, that’s a good point! How are you doing? Getting ready for your holiday?

@Wise0wl do you think you could wait until the day after just for more reassurance? Everything crossed AF doesn't show up tomorrow x

@ThelastRolo20 ah thanks! It went well thank you, I’m totally exhausted now!

@Ladyinpink1 wow your vitamins are comprehensive! If this isn’t my month I think I might try something like this (not sure which brand or amount as I’ve not done all my research) https://www.amazon.co.uk/Free-Soul-Supplement-Myo-Inositol-Chromium/dp/B0BBR5WW47/

AF was possibly due today or tomorrow based on my last couple of cycles, but I’m also conscious I’ve tried hard with vitamins to lengthen my cycles a bit as post MMCs they have been short. I’m not sure what to do about testing, definitely not before mid-day tomorrow (but will ‘save’ my FMU - things I never thought I’d say, or that I’d keep cups of wee around the house but hey ho), but I’m also a bit scared of the result either way tbh.

@NphysT have you tested again?? Hope it's good news!

@Wise0wl how was your day at work? Hope it went well.

@Ladyinpink1 wow you're taking so many amazing vitamins, I went with CoQ10, folic acid and vit D 😂

I'm also ditching OPKs etc so will feel weird when we try next month but I find doing them quite stressful so seems counter intuitive. When's AF due for you? X

Could you test tonight and get OH to check the test maybe as an alternative to you checking it yourself?

@ThelastRolo20 maybe. But the crushing disappointment of a BFN the night before a big day at work is also a risk to take…! It is never easy. It really does feel like a very exhausting real-life version of one of those ‘choose your own adventure’ story books!

@Wise0wl is it worth testing tonight after a hold? I wonder if you'd prefer knowing and being able to start progesterone early and risking a BFN disappointment, as opposed to finding out on two days and wishing you'd known earlier?

Never easy is it?!

@NphysT I think I can see it too. Fingers crossed 🤞

I just had a tiny bit of pink spotting when I wiped and now wish I’d tested this morning as I know I need to take progesterone from a positive test, but also it’s still a bit early (probably about 9DPO, AF tomorrow) for a test not using FMU. I definitely can’t test tomorrow as have a big meeting at work and don’t want to be distracted, so will have to wait for Thursday as planned. I wish this didn’t take up so much of my brain all the time!

@NphysT I see it!! Fingers crossed it develops 🥰

Hi all, decided I needed a little break from the app. Currently 9dpo and think I've got a very very faint line. Did a test last night and saw a shadow of a line but know its still quite early. Not sure how I feel about it, was certain we were out this month as only managed to dtd 4 and 5 days before ovulation because of dh working away. Trying to not get my hopes up but I've ordered some frers to do tomorrow.

Anyone else see a line? The pic isn't as clear

@Ladyinpink1 I'm okay thanks - on countdown now to my 12 week scan on Saturday. It's hard not to catastrophise about things that might have gone wrong since my last scan, but I just have to keep reminding myself that I have no reason to suppose anything is wrong and that the odds are in my favour at this point. It's definitely hard to just assume everything's fine though after a previous loss.
I'm sorry to hear it was a BFN for you - you never know though, every pregnancy is different so having early BFPs before doesn't necessarily mean it would happen this time. I wouldn't worry too much about your age either (easier said than done, I know!) - I saw a really interesting article linked on another thread about the stats on fertility at over 35 and I was amazed to see that they are based on records from the 17th century! Definitely worth a read and it might give you some reassurance that TTC is more favourable to over-35s than people generally think: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-24128176

@Wise0wl Sorry to hear you are feeling poorly at the moment. And it's totally understandable and natural to feel both anticipation and fear at the prospect of being pregnant again. Some of the stuff on this thread about positive affirmations is brilliant and definitely might be useful here for trying to think positively about it. I really hope you get good news this week. ❤

@UrsulaSings123 Have a lovely time in Paris!

@samilicious Another classic moment, I hope you're keeping a record of all of these for the book that you have to write. 😂

@samilicious that's amazing - the pub must have been very confused 😂

@UrsulaSings123 oh don't worry about me, we aren't trying until April anyway so I was almost wanting AF to arrive (can you imagine?).

You can have a positive OPK with HCG still in the system if it's low enough 😄 I had positives for 3 weeks and period came on week 4 so I must have overlapped x

@Ladyinpink1 so sorry about the BFN. I hope though that it means you can take your medicines and get over your cough.
What do you take at the moment? Might mean we can share ideas for what to do next month? I’m 36 so share your worries about age.

@Ladyinpink1 rubbish that you're not seeing anything so far, DH is the worst for getting my hopes up too. Even if he just talks about stuff or mentions a chance of having another it gets me hopeful like it's real. AF came in full force for me a day late on Sunday, but don't feel too bad about it. I've only ever conceived when I haven't done much apart from vitamins to 'try' and focused on myself and being happy so that's what I'm doing for the next 6 months, while exploring tests with GP to ease worries. I know it feels like giving up but it's more and more liberating the more I forget about it all. Hope you're ok - I recommend ordering fancy choc to cushion the AF blow, and if you don't need it, celebration choc!

@13lucy hey Lucy! Don't apologise, we all need breaks sometimes. Glad the mindfulness course is helping, I'm trying to get back into some meditation stuff on that Headspace app - this has spurred me on to keep at it! Hope the holiday has the same effect on you it had on clueless and you come back to an ovulation / BFP soon after.

My ultrasound was during my period and I rang up to ask if it was ok and accidentally called a pub (I’d not long booked for an Xmas cheeseboard evening 🤪) they had to stop me talking 'WOAH WOAH WOAH - THIS IS THE GLEBE' 😅 only me. I think I actually cried with embarrassment. They could still see all the follicle stuff even then so don't worry too much.

@moosey89 so sorry to hear about possible redundancy. My DH is the same - 3 in 3 years - after working at the same place for forever. Swapped jobs then was always the 'last one in' so first one out, regardless of his performance topping others. Big hugs to you - hopefully it doesn't happen but here for you if it does

@Bugdem123 good on you for trying anyway - I think worrying about how we're going to feel in future helps weirdly. Like I always stress myself out so much with worry, then the time comes and I've already done half the sads / processing so it cushions the blow a bit. Like my friend's DD let slip she was pregnant months before she announced, by friend said her DD was just saying it because she wanted it to happen - but even that made me prepare for it happening soon.

Welcome @Prettypennies and @UrsulaSings123
I have an almost 3 year old and had TFMR just before she was just under 2. Here for any support you need ♥️

@Wise0wl ooh spotting on and off! Fingers crossed x

@ThelastRolo20 haha thanks! Sorry to hear you've had AF. Like you say looking at the positives at least you won't have to deal with it on holiday.

These are my tests this morning. The OPKs are getting stronger but I don't see how I could ovulate if there's still hcg there... feeling quite confused.

@UrsulaSings123 definitely take the OPKs - we all know we would too 😂

@Ladyinpink1 I'm sorry - the stark whiteness is always so hard to see. I'm 35 in a few months so that's also on my mind. Let me know what weird and wonderful tips you come across! 😂

@moosey89 same - they said they'd scan me in the first 12 weeks, I'm thinking 7 and 10 weeks (7 in case 6 is too early and adds to worry, and 10 as that's when the first baby stopped growing). Emotional minefield

I've started my March cycle now, AF came 2 days early but that hopefully means it won't fall exactly on my holiday dates in April, worlds longest countdown continues...

@Ladyinpink1 sorry you're feeling so deflated. Like the others have said, 9dpo is still very early, but I understand you have had positives at this stage before. I was 35 a few months ago and my partner is 51 so I am worried about age too. Apparently there's more eggs with chromosome problems as you age and I wonder if that's why I had that miscarriage. I'm still hoping for you. Also thank you for the details about what happened after your miscarriages, helps to know ovulation can happen so soon.

I think if I get pregnant again I'd have a scan at 7 weeks, or even 8. This last time I had a scan at 6 weeks 3 days and it was too early and I ended up having to have 4 scans over 3 weeks before they confirmed a miscarriage. Those weeks waiting were worse than the actual confirmation itself and I never want to experience that limbo again.

We are leaving soon and I have packed the opk's 🤦‍♀️ I really am obsessed taking them on holiday with me!

@ThelastRolo20 I'm the same about scans - both my MMCs had no symptoms, and I'd want another dealt with as fast as possible. There's one advantage to having multiple losses in that I would get scans from the EPU every 2 weeks for the first 12 so at least wouldn't have to pay for them!