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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Have I missed the boat? is 35 too old to conceive?

169 replies

BrandySnaps1 · 11/01/2024 10:44

Have been trying for 7 months, brought ovulation sticks, still nada. Last month period was 4 days late - i was elated especially as i have been tracking like clockwork since the summer.

Period came and the cramps were the worst they have ever been and very heavy flow. Would have loved to have had 2/3 children, but am now worried as Im 35 and focused on my career all this time. Only to quit last year due to burn out and now focusing on mental and physical health.

Seems like a catch 22 situation and now I feel stuck, anxious, worried, did i make the right decision with anything? No mat leave, no children. Could really use some helpful opinions please.

OP posts:
Original poster
BrandySnaps1 · 11/01/2024 13:43

thanks all. Im taking folic acid and do find when stressed/anxious neither me or DH can even think about sex and every month that passes it gets more stressful. I will book an appointment with GP though to see what they can offer. Encouraging to hear those 40+ have also conceived naturally. Thank you for sharing because it can really seem so lonely.

I had to leave my job due to the stress and have been part time working/odd jobs for the last year which has been fine, however now thinking about a baby and no mat leave is stressful. Not sure if I made the right decision and even thinking about going back into full time work when trying to conceive/even be pregnant worries me because i know how discriminatory companies can be.

OP posts:
Original poster
BrandySnaps1 · 11/01/2024 13:39

KittyFantastica · 11/01/2024 12:37

I turned 35 in October and I've just had a positive test after first month of trying. Not impossible!

This is great for you, but not helpful in this circumstance?

OP posts:
anywherehollie · 11/01/2024 12:40

It might not be your age at all, just how long it takes you personally to fall pregnant. I have become pregnant at 23 and 35 first time, anecdotal but age played no part for me.

KittyFantastica · 11/01/2024 12:37

I turned 35 in October and I've just had a positive test after first month of trying. Not impossible!

JadeVS72 · 11/01/2024 12:18

I echo 7 months isn't that long, 35 isn't that old and there are loads of options BUT check what the criteria is for fertility help on the nhs in your area- it may be something like you had to have started trying at 33 and been trying for over a year before they help you. I remember some friends of friends having issues accessing it because they "started too late"
Fwiw, took me 10 months to conceive at 28.

TempleOfBloom · 11/01/2024 12:14

Who knows OP.

Not helpful I know but at your age I would think your individual fertility is more of an issue than age. If it is an issue at all. I.e if you find it takes you a while to conceive now, it might have taken the same time when you were 24. And it might take the same time (fast, slow or not at all) at 42.

I had a baby in my early 40s , first month of TTC, no problems. Lots of women do. But it’s your individual circumstances and fertility that count. And anyway, any difficulties might be your partner…

Good luck, 7 months isn’t that long!

SarahB88 · 11/01/2024 12:08

I’m 35 and pregnant with my first, I’ll be 36 when baby is born.

We were lucky to conceive very quickly but we had a couple of months where it didn’t happen and I found once I got out of my head it happened straight away.

Have a think about acupuncture for fertility too. I did it and honestly think it’s what balanced my body out after being on the pill so long, the lady I went to treats lots of people for fertility. I don’t know if it’s medically proven but I certainly felt better mentally when having it and have continued through my pregnancy.

The month I conceived my partner also took male fertility vitamins which might have helped. I had a couple of massages and kept busy with other things to not think about conceiving so much. We had sex almost every day from my period ending to the end of my fertile window, I ovulate very soon after period ending so we had to be quick! Have to admit it was a big surprise that we got a positive that month as I was so chilled out about it I was convinced it was my reset month and nothing would happen but here we are!

Feliciacat · 11/01/2024 12:00

I’m 36 and have been trying with zero success for 15 months. However, fertility tests show there’s nothing wrong with me or my partner (we’re 36 and 41). I think our problem might be that my partner has just recovered from a chronic illness and he was previously only well enough to have sex once a month when I was ovulating. He’s recovered now and we’re hopeful that by regularly having sex then we will now conceive.

My point with this oversharing is that it’s so unlikely to conceive per cycle even when everything is perfect with people’s fertility that it can take months. The right sperm has to be lined up with the right egg at the right time. If you’re not having sex every other day between the end of your period and the end of ovulating then you will reduce your chances a lot. Keep trying.

Ems1992 · 11/01/2024 11:56

There is not enough said about TTC and the difficulties as we get older. Listen to the podcast on The Huberman Lab with Dr Natalie Crawford. She is a fertility expert and it is so interesting and factual. It may really help you. It definitely has me! Xx

Lyly86 · 11/01/2024 11:54

Keep going, I'm 37 and gave birth to my first last month, prior to conception I was feeling the same as you so got a fertility check done privately for peace of mind. It alleviated a lot of the stress and then I conceived shortly after

PossumintheHouse · 11/01/2024 11:51

I hope not, OP. Seeing as I turned 39 today and we’ve only just started trying! It can take longer when you’re older, you’ve no need to worry after seven months.

Cas112 · 11/01/2024 11:49

Start being worried when it takes longer than a year or two OP

jolies1 · 11/01/2024 11:48

Conceived naturally at 35 but took around 9-10 months & tracker app.

EnjoyTheMushrooms · 11/01/2024 11:10

Not too late at all. I'm 38, 39 this year and I'm pregnant. I had my first at 35.

The stress and anxiety won't help regardless!

onlyconnect · 11/01/2024 11:08

37 and 45 here! Keep trying

Devilsmommy · 11/01/2024 11:08

Keep going. I was 36 when I had my first. It's surprising how many women have their first child over 40, so at 35 you're ahead

BabyMoonPie · 11/01/2024 11:06

I had mine at 36 and 41.

TTC can be a slog - make a GP appointment so you can be checked out (and your other half too). Good luck

catsnore · 11/01/2024 11:03

Keep going OP. I had a baby at 42 x

bravotango · 11/01/2024 10:50

7 months isn't that long in TTC terms but as you're 35 I think you can access fertility testing via your GP now you've been trying for 6+months? That might be a good place to start and give you a bit more info! Also 35 is well within the realms of normal age to start having children, just look at the threads on the TTC board here 😊