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Original poster

Recurrent miscarriage and genetic findings- any success stories?

67 replies

vix_85 · 29/04/2023 11:19

We have just found out at 9+5 that our 5th consecutive pregnancy (no children) has been another missed miscarriage. D&C is booked for next week and after private fertility testing (because GP didn't seem to care), genetic issues is becoming the mostly likely cause. This will be tested next week with the removed materials.

Has anyone had this finding and had a successful pregnancy? How did you do it? How long was the process?

I am nearly 38, my heart is breaking and we are preparing for the worst next week, with being parents maybe off the schedule for us.

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Unicorn2023 · 26/05/2023 22:06

@vix_85 No not not a thing 🥲I phoned to follow up the results and was told it would be 6 weeks until I got them babe it taking to long 🥲 I’ve been told the same to stop till the results come in which is so difficult ♥️ feel like we are wasting time xx

Original poster
vix_85 · 26/05/2023 18:08

@Unicorn2023 so glad to hear you're out and about again 🌞 Yes I'm ok thank you. Back to the normality of life without pregnancy. It seems genetics takes a long time so we have a callback being scheduled 8 weeks from now and we should have test results before then. We've been told to pause trying until they know the results. Have you had anything back?xx

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Unicorn2023 · 25/05/2023 21:42

Hi @vix_85 I am doing good thank you 🤗 I have been going out a lot of walks and went some shopping too so getting there it was good to get out. how are you getting on? ♥️ x

Original poster
vix_85 · 25/05/2023 21:24

Hi @Unicorn2023 how are you doing? Have you managed to achieve some small goals and get some normality back in to your days?x

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Unicorn2023 · 19/05/2023 13:14

@vix_85 I should just have went back to work too I think like you it would definitely have been a distraction ♥️ I will have a look into it today thank you 😊 and thank you for being there for me talking to you has got me through this ♥️ it’s the shittiest thing in the world to happen but it helps when someone knows how you feel. Take care of yourself and try not to do to much take time for yourself xx

Original poster
vix_85 · 19/05/2023 12:51

@Unicorn2023 work has been a total distraction and avoidance mechanism for me. I've cried and got angry but just got on with it mostly, behaving like nothing happened.

It sounds like you really need some support. Depending on your location, petals counselling is recommended. Unfortunately my region isn't covered but yours may well be. Do try and get outside and do those little things each day, otherwise this will occur consume you xx

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Original poster
vix_85 · 19/05/2023 12:49

Thanks @thedogisstaring for your story. So sorry for your losses. As you say, there are positive stories out there!

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thedogisstaring · 19/05/2023 11:28

Hi OP, we TTC for 8 years with recurrent MC. We had the fetus tested on MC number 4 and from that genetic translocation was identified. We were then tested and turns out DH is the carrier of the translocation, in turn his mum and dad were tested and turns out his mum is a carrier. His sisters were then also tested and fortunately they are not carriers.
Anyway, I had another couple of MC and then hit my forties and we chose to come to terms with being childless.
BUT... Obviously MIL was also a carrier and she had 3 live healthy children, she did also have 3 MC in between.

The moral of the story is that the same issue will have different results for different people! I did feel much better just knowing a reason for my infertility though.

Good luck... fingers crossed you'll be in the same group as MIL!

Unicorn2023 · 19/05/2023 11:08

@vix_85 No they gave me nothing at all I phoned my doctor to see if they had received anything but nothing so far it’s just annoying being left on limbo with no one to phone to chase things up 😢 how have you been finding work? I haven’t went back yet not really left the house which isn’t good but I just can’t face anyone it was my birthday yesterday and the last thing I wanted to do was celebrate it, it just made me feel worse being 39 and feeling hopeless 😞 xx

Original poster
vix_85 · 19/05/2023 11:03

Ah @Unicorn2023 that is so hard that you've had nothing at all. Did you get a consultant number or a secretary contact you could try?

I haven't told the hospital as from reading online it could take a few months. My HCG at surgery was over 40,000 so it's got to come down a lot to reach 0.

Hope you're OK x

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Unicorn2023 · 19/05/2023 10:05

@vix_85 I'm doing ok thank you ♥️ I’ve still not heard anything from the hospital about my results it’s a joke 😢 Aww babe that is a head spin have you contacted the hospital to tell them this? Xx

Original poster
vix_85 · 19/05/2023 08:57

Hope you're keeping well @Unicorn2023. The last few weeks have been a blur of work travel for me. The hospital call got rescheduled to next week, but the hardest thing at the moment is still testing positive on pregnancy tests. What a head spin 🫨😔 x

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TakeMe2Insanity · 13/05/2023 20:02

Unicorn2023 · 02/05/2023 14:31

@TakeMe2Insanity Thank you for the advice 🫶🏻 I’ve had IVF twice which also ended in miscarriage had all the test and they came back normal so it’s unexplained infertility for me but if something comes back with the genetics for me then at least I’ll know been going through this now for 5 years 😢 I’m so glad you got yours sorted that’s a massive relief ♥️

I know it sounds very easy to say but please don’t give up hope. It took us 10 years to have our DC! To have DC2 it has taken 6 years to get this far (currently 12 weeks) and it’s not a given in my mind until I actually have hold of the baby. Sending you lots of love and positivity.

Unicorn2023 · 09/05/2023 11:41

@vix_85 I did thank you 🤗 I went out for a wee while on Saturday it was good to get some fresh air ♥️ how are you? Did you have a good weekend? Xx

Original poster
vix_85 · 09/05/2023 08:19

@Unicorn2023 I hope you had a good weekend and you managed some outside time x

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Original poster
vix_85 · 06/05/2023 12:33

Many thanks @Patchworksack 😊

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Unicorn2023 · 06/05/2023 11:49

@vix_85 I agree they do mean well but it’s too raw just now to take anything in a nice way 😢
I’m in the same boat my fiancé said the same about adoption and if they come back with the genetics 🧬 I’ve decided that it for us. That’s amazing and was so quick 🤞🏻♥️ I will need to phone them I’ve heard nothing since I left the hospital last Wednesday 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’m just drying my hair just now I’m dreading it already but I need to do this or I don’t think I’ll ever go out again xx

Patchworksack · 06/05/2023 11:47

I’m so sorry you are going through this. It’s pretty unlikely you’ve had 5 consecutive pregnancies with genetic issues. We got fobbed off with this until MC 4 was tested and was normal genetically. NHS recurrent miscarriage testing proved unhelpful but I was monitored and scanned in future pregnancy. We were actually helped by Prof Siobhan Quenby at Coventry university hospital and had a successful pregnancy first time after a diagnosis of high uNK cells. All my losses were around 10-11 weeks.

ooooofffff · 06/05/2023 11:38

I can also recommend CRP clinic in Epsom.

I had several miscarriages with no explanation. NHS weren't able to do very much.

A friend recommended CRP clinic and I now have two children.

I had some type of killer cell issue. Every pregnancy was viewed by my body as an infection and terminated. I had a huge concoction of medication and treatments but we now have a 3 & 5 year old.

I'm so sorry for your situation, I remember how heartbreaking it was. Wishing you all the best x

Original poster
vix_85 · 06/05/2023 11:30

@Unicorn2023 I think they mean well but sometimes it's hard to dissect their true intentions.

I think I've come to the decision that unless it's my body doing this, it won't be happening. I know people have huge success with adoption and surrogacy but I really doubt my connection unless I've carried it. My husband is not up for adoption due to the same reasons.

I've already got my referral booking call for Wednesday so the surgeon did what he promised and I couldn't be more grateful.

I hope you're doing ok today and that you've got your shop visit planned x

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Unicorn2023 · 06/05/2023 11:25

@vix_85 OMG 😢 that is absolutely horrendous the sad fact is they think there suggestions are helpful but are they F**k (sorry for swearing) mine was least you know you can get pregnant and if I could carry it for you I would well woopy doo thank for that!
I wish people just wouldn’t say anything as if you don’t already feel bad enough without this. You would expect more from family but I’ve realised sometimes they can be worse with there comments they don’t help at all 😞😢

Original poster
vix_85 · 06/05/2023 10:10

And the external 'advice' and 'suggestions' start. Desperately trying to keep my cool at comments like "looks like you'll need a surrogate", "my missus can carry babies, she might help", "no point being upset, you're ok".

I want to SCREAM at everyone as these comments are so hurtful. Particularly family writing off my body suggesting we start looking for a surrogate because they're disappointed. Sorry folks but maybe you'll have to suck it up and accept we may not give you grandchildren! That's not a guilt or pressure I should have to bear in my opinion. 😤🤯

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Unicorn2023 · 05/05/2023 12:27

@vix_85 Thank you so much thats a great idea I will definitely do that ♥️ You are so right we will get through this you have no idea how much I needed to hear that 🤗 make sure you rest today sit watch tele and eat chocolate try not to do to much 😘 x

Original poster
vix_85 · 05/05/2023 12:18

@Unicorn2023 please don't apologise. This is going to be a rollercoaster which we've both unfortunately been on before. You made it through last time and you'll male it through this one. We both will. Why don't you try and make some mini goals for the next few days? Maybe tomorrow aim to get dressed in the morning and pop to a shop to get a Magazine and treats. One hurdle overcome and very briefly outside 😘 The next day maybe aim for a walk around the block to get some fresh air. Try and take a positive from each day; even getting dressed and out of bed is a positive and should be celebrated in this situation x

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