First Timers TTC. Safe space for brain dumps, questions, whinges and celebrations. Part 2!

@TinyDancer91 oh no, sorry everything is so slow. An appointment 6 months away is just crazy isn't it! Do you know when you will get your test to see if you're a carrier too? Hope your husband is not feeling too disheartened

My hyfosy went well last week. It was a bit painful and uncomfortable but nothing too bad. She saw both fallopian tubes were clear in the end although it seemed to take a while. Unfortunately I'd already ovulated by the day of the test so we're out for this month and starting again next cycle. TWW will be over Christmas and New year so I'll be doing lots of tests I imagine as there will be many boozy days planned. Usually I just wait for AF now. Really hoping the hyfosy is going to give us a boost 🤞 we've got a referral on the system to assisted conception now but I won't be disappointed if first appointment is not straight away.

Hey @TinyDancer91

I am sorry to hear about your DH. Do you know how long it will take for you to be tested? Sorry everything takes so long! Every time AF is late it’s impossible not to get your hopes up.

All seems to be okay at the moment. I have my first midwife appointment next week. I have very bad sickness and constant nausea but I’m doing well otherwise.

Oh my goodness! I am delighted that the pregnancy stuck; congratulations Ditzydaisychain!

As for TinyDancer, LucyLoopyLu and Beelieve86; you all have such big months this month. Fingers crossed for you all! Would be so lovely if we could all get some progress (which could just be good test results if not a pregnancy) for Christmas. Good luck.

Hello everyone!

I haven’t messaged on here in months. I hope you’re all doing well.

my partner has confirmed obstructive azoospermia so in September he had sperm retrieval surgery. We have enough frozen sperm for 3 rounds of ivf.

we have started the ivf process now. I am two weeks into down regulation injections and I start stims tomorrow. Feeling hopeful that all goes well in the next couple of weeks!!

@TinyDancer91 hi, sorry things are feeling a bit hard at the moment.

I'm just waiting for my hyfosy which is on 16th. Unless I have a later ovulation I'm out for this month but due to ovulate on 16th or 17th and you're not meant to have sex before or for 24 hours after.
I'm looking forward to it being over!

Hope your appointment goes well

@Feliciacat thanks for thinking of me. I am doing well, AF did not arrive and I am almost at the 6 week mark. My sister said to me yesterday you look like death. I am very pale and have awful sickness already so she isn’t wrong 🤣. I played it off as a dodgy Chinese, as I’m not ready to tell anyone in real life.

What great news for you and your DH! Stress can have such a huge impact on your wellbeing, hopefully this news lightens the mental load.

Hope everyone is doing well 💕

How are you doing @Ditzydaisychain?

My DH finally had his semen analysis back and his sperm is normal. This, combined with my bloods being normal has given me renewed hope. Maybe it’s just DH’s illness that has caused us stress and that’s why we’ve been going for a year with no luck.

I hope you’re all doing as well as possible, I am quite invested in this thread and will love to hear updates if anyone is in a position to share.

@TinyDancer91 you just never see these things happening to you do you! Just don't even imagine it would ever take that long, that infertility or losses happen to someone else. It's so hard - my first pregnancy took 30 cycles! I'm now 7 years since that first month ttc (not tried that whole time for various reasons, it's been in blocks) and I've actually lost sight of what life might look like as a mum, I just can't even imagine it anymore. Can't even imagine having a bump let alone a baby!

My OH has a semen analysis on the 7th and we have a private appointment on the 16th so we will see if there's anything short term that can be done or if we're looking at IVF. It's all pretty daunting to be honest.

@Ditzydaisychain congratulations!! 🥰✨💖 xxx

@Ditzydaisychain
Congratulations!!! 🎊🎊🎊

Oh @Ditzydaisychain that is great news! Tentative congratulations! I hope work gets better. At least maybe you can go on maternity leave though!

Hey everyone

I hope everyone is doing well.
I have some news to share although still early days.
I took a test at 9DPO and got a faint positive. I then took a digital one yesterday and it said pregnant 1-2 weeks.

I know I’d said I wouldn’t test early but my boobs really hurt, and my left one was noticeably bigger than my other one, so I went for it.

I’ve had an awful time at work the past few weeks so I’m so grateful for some joy 💕

@Ditzydaisychain
Aww that's so sweet!! 🥺 I hope you guys are blessed soon! Honestly that's a great decision because my gynecologist asked me to start exercising (I'm not overweight) but she asked me to at least take a brisk walk for 30 minutes every day.

Thank you for sharing about your ED. That must have been a really tough time. I'm glad you're doing better now and anything you do to keep your body healthy is going to help conceive.
I recommend also doing some yoga poses that are simple, if you don't (butterfly, bridge, yoni mudra).

Honestly I haven't moved the last 3 days because I was on my period but I usually walk to work so that's a4km walk every day. That's about the only exercise I do. 🤣

@Ditzydaisychain it’s horrible isn’t it! I’m also super stressed atm so it may be that my cycles are off simply because of this … ugh! I took a test earlier (more to just prepare myself) and it was BFN as expected. I’m at the stage now where I just want it to arrive and be done with it 🤣

I’m sorry to hear about your experience. I had a chemical back in November last year which was a little bitter sweet as I was happy that I’d got to that stage.. but here we are almost a year later 😅 life can be so cruel!

xx

@Feliciacat yes as weird as it sounds I have taken it as a slight positive. I’m trying to think okay so I have possibly done it. Can I do it again?!

Gosh your poor DH. I’m glad the doctor was thorough enough to do further checks. Will he be waiting long to find out about his bowel?
It’s really interesting (not sure if that’s the right word so apologies!) to read about your DH. My DH is convinced he is the problem as he has a varicocele. I’ve told him this doesn’t mean anything and to go get further checks.

Great to hear your bloods came back fine. It’s one less thing to worry about, 2 of my friends have had great success with ICSI and pregnant on first round. Both needed to go down the IVF route for their second babies due to male infertility.

@ceruleansky I’ve been with my DH almost 11 years and I have had thoughts of why didn’t you have babies years ago you silly woman. But the reality is we were not ready and we have had such a wonderful life together. I don’t know if we would be where we are without those years so I am trying to not think like that. I’m sure we will have our time soon 💕. I’ve started going to the gym to try and live a healthier lifestyle. I have the added complication of suffering from an eating disorder when I was a teen. So I beat myself up a lot that this could be the issue, although my periods never stopped so I’m hopeful I didn’t ruin my body.

@Yolo23 my cycles are a bit like yours so it’s hard to get excited, or really know what’s going on, until you are really late. I have everything crossed for you that it doesn’t make an appearance.

Sorry I’m CD28 today.

My previous cycles were…
Aug - 25 days
July - 25 days
June - 27 days
May - 30 days

so I’m a bit all over the shop - I’ve always had a few days of spotting. Strange it’s not arrived yet! Bizarre but no doubt will make an appearance…

Hello everyone! I hope you’re keeping ok ❤️✨

I’m currently no signs of AF but I’ve avoided testing just yet. As works been a bit chaos and stressful this month, amongst other things, I’ve no clue when I ovulated - we only DTD once but I’m fairly certain it wasn’t within the right window - although timing is uncertain now with the lateness of AF.

I’ve got endo so normally my periods (just before) are extremely painful. I’ve not had nothing yet, or no spotting. As I’m only something like cd27, I’m going to hold out for a few more days - I always have VERY sore boobs and I have nothing so I’ve no clue what’s going on! X

@Feliciacat very true!! I've been with the same person since I was 18. We got married at 31. :)

Bowel fistula sounds painful!! Hope your DH feels better with the treatment! It's fantastic news to hear that your blood work is clean. Hoping for good things to come soon! 💗

@ceruleansky well, I dare say that it’s better to have children with fertility treatment with the right partner than have children easily with the wrong partner. I’m sure having children later is the better decision for you. I hope you are successful soon.

@Ditzydaisychain sadly, I suppose it must have been a chemical pregnancy. At least it shows you can conceive though? Maybe that’s some small comfort.

Thank you for asking about DH! He hasn’t had a semen analysis yet but will have one at the end of October. He has had a lot of prostate pain and we wondered if he’d also got a varicocele or a major prostate problem so he paid to see a private urologist. The urologist discovered there was a varicocele but says it won’t be affecting his sperm as it’s only 2mm. He also found no infection in the prostate so told DH that it was basically all in his head but that he’d do a pelvic MRI just to reassure him.

Well…the MRI shows a bowel fistula! No wonder he’s been exhausted and in pain! He’s seeing a colo-rectal specialist about it. I wonder if the fistula could be affecting fertility if it perhaps runs from the bowel to the prostate. The semen analysis will be interesting. My bloods came back fine so I don’t think it’s female factor infertility. Fingers crossed for some results and treatment for DH!

I’m going into all this detail in case it helps anyone else. There are all kinds of health issues that can affect things!

@Ditzydaisychain
That's quite possible.. it's so unpredictable and it's a roller coaster of emotions. You don't know when it's okay to be happy. That's a good point, even I've decided to wait to test.
Do you plan to do anything differently next month?
I really don't know how to increase chances of a positive result. I've been going for walks every day and restricting my diet.
My husband has diabetes which has caused motility issues for him, so even that could even be the reason. He's started medication now, finally.

@ceruleansky I am sorry it wasn’t your month.
I’m assuming I had a chemical pregnancy. I felt okay yesterday but have felt a bit teary today.
This is the latest I have been reaching day 7 before AF arrived. I’ve made myself a promise that I will not test now until over a week has passed. The latest I have been previously was 4/5 days.

@Feliciacat thank you that unmumsnetty hug means a lot 💕 how are things with your DH?

@Feliciacat
It is hard!! Hope you get some good news soon!

I keep thinking that my body can still do a lot of things that other bodies can't so I'm grateful. And, you know, I'll take care of it and try my best to conceive but if it's not happening for us, it's just something we have to live with.. 😅

Movies have definitely warped our idea of getting pregnant. They do it once and boom!! Pregnant. Real life is so different.

I wish I had gotten married earlier though and tried for a kid in my 20s but eh, such is life. 🤣