Preparing to TTC in 2023

@ViewFromTheAfternoon I know what you mean about the doom and gloom! Misery loves company, I guess. People are far more likely to be complaining than saying the positives as that’s just human nature, that’s what I have started to think.
What a lovely thought you’ve had. Christmas time is so special and it’s so exciting to think about cosy traditions for all times of year, isn’t it! I think I’m most excited for holding their little hand for the first time. Seeing them accomplish something- a smile, clapping hands, first day of school, passing an exam. And just like @CRbear it’s so nice to picture your partner becoming a daddy for the first time, if it’s your first, or for the 2nd 3rd or 4th time! Feel like it’ll always be as special
@LovelyBitOfSquirrelll that’s fascinating that your DC could look so different to one another. I wonder if DC3 will look like their brother, sister or a combination! I bet you must feel a bit more relaxed this time around as you’ve been there twice and know what to expect?

Hi all, and welcome to the people I haven’t spoken to!
I am the same - always reading the thread but don’t always have time to reply- it’s lovely to read everyone’s plans/ experiences.

For me, one of the things I loved and kept me going through tough stages of pregnancy is seeing who my children look like. DD is my double (with a bit of DH) and DS is a good mix of me and DH, but he is blonde which really threw us as we are all quite dark haired. I still can’t quite get over it. I’m excited to see what the third could look like!
Agree Christmas is very special- but all holidays we really enjoy and get stuck in to whatever kid friendly activities are going on.
I am excited to smell the new baby smell- and kiss the little newborn head- sounds crazy but it’s just divine! Haha.

I hope everyone is doing ok. I am struggling to lose weight- staying the same. The cold is doing me no good as I just want to eat!!

Hello!

I thought I would join in.

Age:- 31
TTC:- Dec 2023

December seems so far away! DP and I have been together for 4 years, we found out we were unexpectedly pregnant last year but had a MMC at 12 weeks. We have decided to wait to TTC properly until I have a job. I am currently a full time student and hopefully graduate in July. We will have a more stable home then and want to give it a few months after I start a new jobs to get full maternity, we've said Christmas next year which is exciting.

Since my MMC my anxiety about my fertility has been quite bad. I've done a hertility test and found that my Prolactin is slightly high due to stress, so I need to get myself together in the next year. I want to get fit, I've signed up for a half marathon...😅 and I'm hoping to loose some weight so I'm ready for it.

It's so nice to read messages of others waiting too, it feels weird to know but also to just get on with ordinary life.

@ViewFromTheAfternoon - I know what you mean! People haven’t intentionally been telling me it’s awful but close friends have had very challenging periods recently and it does make me think…so we really want to do this?!

I know it sounds silly but I’m looking forward to making my kids birthday cakes. And throwing their birthday parties. I also cannot wait to see my partner holding our tiny baby - soppy!

Hi everyone! I know I don't post on here much but I still read everyone's posts and it gets me so excited. I just feel like June is bloody aaaaages away so I have to try and supress my excitement otherwise I start wishing the time away and getting impatient.

However... I'm about to do the opposite now and ask everyone what they are most looking forward to about having a baby/being a parent?

I feel like there's lots of doom and gloom in life and recently I've had some people tell me "don't have kids!" (They have kids themselves and seem to enjoy warning me about how AWFUL and exhausting it is) and i would just love some positivity and to hear about all the wonderful little things that are (hopefully) in store for all of us.

For me, a big one is Christmas! Having a proper Christmas again with all its magic and excitement. Then also little things like seeing my baby smile and laugh for the first time. Reading them stories, seeing them in school plays and discover their interests. I'm excited to even just go shopping pushing a pram around 😂 I went round to my mum's house on Sunday and my step dad daughter was there with her 1 year old. It was night time and dark and the fire was on and we were sat watching Peter Pan and I was soooo broody just thinking I honestly can't wait to sit watching Disney films with mine!

What are you all looking forward to the most?

Hi everyone! It’s lovely reading all your messages. I feel in shock that I can join in - we will be TTC no.1 in January. I got my mirena out last November as I knew I have PCOS and wanted to give myself a year to do everything I could to get a regular cycle back before launching into TTC. I’ve got a regular cycle now for the first time in my life - almost normal at around 38-40 days. I went a year without a period once. Anyway all of this means I never thought we’d have a shot naturally- so “starting” never meant much! So it’s come as a bit of a shock stupidly that it’s 5 weeks to January and we could actually get pregnant naturally! So excited for everyone!

@buckingmad thank you! Glad it’s not just me, feels like it should be obvious!

@Mushroo I filled in a form on my local hospital's website. They then got in touch with me to arrange booking in appointment.

I had the same panic. I rang my doctors and asked what do I do!

@TrudyProud thank you! I’d been going round in circles on the NHS website, nice to hear from someone with actual experience :)

In london you don't need to tell your GP you are trying. There's nothing they would do unless you struggled to conceive after a certain timeframe.

When you hopefully get your BFP you either self refer to the hospital you hope to have your antenatal care with or depending on where you are in the country your GP might. Note, unless you have specific issues eg recurrent miscarriage or an ivf pregnancy you probably won't see/speak to a midwife until 10-12 weeks for your booking in appointment and scan. That was my experience at least.

Does anyone know if I’m supposed to tell my GP I’m trying? Given it’s so hard to get an appointment seems a bit of a hassle, but if I’m supposed to I will.

Also (getting ahead of myself here) if I get a positive test what do I do? Make a GP appointment?

@happyfeet5 @Mushroo antibiotics are definitely code for pregnant especially if you are a big drinker.

My friends knew I was pregnant at 7 weeks because I turned down a drink at a party- it was 10am 🤣. At 24 they may not have the wherewithal to keep 🤐 but by your late 20s/30s people understand how delicate and precarious pregnancy can be so leave you to lie until your reveal.

I didn't tell most friends I was pregnant until I was 18 weeks but everyone I saw the moment I got my BFP knew because I wasn't drinking.

@Mushroo I see! That’s tricky then. Maybe stop drinking in January. Dry January, and you’ve chosen to extend it for health and you now eat chocolate or do something else instead. Haha. Yes I’d get a non alcoholic drink in a gin glass. Easy to put a few berries in it nobody will be the wiser. Mine’s 28 days exactly at last check! Coming off the pill second week in December.

@happyfeet5 its going to hard as I ALWAYS drink (that sounds like I have a problem, i just drink when socialising haha!)

I think in my group of friends antibiotics is just code for pregnant. I might see if I can nurse a glass for the whole evening / order my own ‘gin’ and tonics that are just tonics. So tricky!

How long are you cycles? Mine are long (30 - 32 days so each month is going to draggggg)

@Mushroo glad you relate to this! Hmm, could you be on ‘antibiotics’?!

Welcome everyone!

@happyfeet5 yes it’s starting feel very real! I know logically it can take ages but I keep thinking what if we’re in the lucky few it happens straightaway!

I’ve just been invited to a hen party in Feb and I’m already thinking how I might have to hide that I’m not drinking!

Christmas is definitely making me broodier!

Hey everyone and welcome!

It’s such a busy lead up to Christmas. Trying to be present rather than feeling excited for next year- but it’s hard! We’re going to a festive light trail tomorrow evening with extended family, we’ve been for several years consecutively now and I can’t help but think how lovely next year may be. Especially seeing families tomorrow evening (as weird as that might sound) it always makes me broodier still! I really can’t wait, but the excitement is mixed with fear that I’ll have problems getting / staying pregnant.
I’m not even 25 yet so I know I’m young but prior to going on the pill I had really heavy periods, I’m hoping contraception hasn’t masked anything sinister. Nobody in my immediate or extended family has had issues.
I saw it takes the average couple a year to conceive! But then have also read lots on here where people have managed it first try. It’s just such a lottery, isn’t it?

Yes we did! Thank you so much! Xx

Congratulations! Hope you had an amazing day x

This would be AMAZING! It’s hard not to get your hopes up isn’t it….. x

I conceived DC1 two weeks after we got married! Good luck

Aww congratulations! Exciting! I got married two weeks ago too 😊 xxx

Hello!
i get married in 2 weeks! EEEEEEK!

i have officially changed my ‘flo’ appt to trying to conceive :) I came off the pill a few months ago as it really didn’t agree with me.

we can’t wait! I’m 28 and my partner is 41 he has 2 children both of whom are adopted so I think he is a tad excited to have one of his ‘own’.

im due to ovulate in 6 days so we’re gonna start cuddling ;) every other day today! I’m already taking folic acid. Any other tips?

good luck everyone <3

The maternity pay is something that troubles me. At my current firm (been there nearly 10 years) they only have statutory maternity pay and over the years ive seen multiple women go on maternity leave and be treated like pariahs! So I don't want to TTC while there.
So I had to give 4 months notice to leave there and starting a new job in Jan. This one looks to only be statutory also (I can't outright ask for if they have enhanced and suspect they would say if they did have it), however the new job is more supportive of women and pays more, so I can save the difference for maternity pay because of statutory maternity and know I won't be treated badly upon return.
This is why I have to wait until May to TTC, because of the probation. I feel bad about only being there a short while also when I do tell them (hopefully) that I'm expecting.
So I feel bad about that for the new firm and upset I have to save all that money too (I'm the higher earner) when it could be statutory also. Sucks. When is the right time though? Time is ticking on and I'm doing the best I can with the situation, but morally feel bad. 😔 xxxx

Yay another may 2023 trier! And for a 2nd! 🥰 anything you are doing to prepare? I have no idea what vitamins etc to take as my first was an accident over 10 years ago and everything has changed so much😱 xxx