TTC after miscarriage thread 12 🌈✨💛💕

@TheBirdintheCave
I can work from home but it gets very intense and is very involved in other people lives , supporting listening, caring. Plus the never ending waiting list and constant feeling of failure as not able to help everyone as quickly as we should be able too. I've been near burn out for last 2 years ( like most ppl in NHS). ( sorry NHS worker rant).

I knew I needed 2 weeks just to fully step back from work. But then stepping back in is hard. I'm sure I will open my emails on Monday and it won't be as bad as it fear. Plus hopefully anything urgent should have been dealt with by colleagues.

I've thought about an email. I think I feel comfortable letting people know face to face. I'm not always the best a wording emails. It's a hard email to write. But I will think about it after your suggestion.

We are almost an all female team so I can't be the only one to have had a MC. And then I worry that I have taken 2 weeks off when maybe others didn't and they think I'm 'milking it'. I'm not normally a worrier and my team is lovely....just really in my head this morning.

@Sailawaygirl I took about three days off when I had my MMC but I work from home so it's slightly different I think. When I came back I sent an email to my colleagues explaining what had happened. Everyone was really supportive and I even got some stories from people who had experienced the same.

I don't think your patients will be angry at you if you explain you were ill (no need to tell them more than that unless you want to).

@TheBirdintheCave . Thank you. Online support has been so vital. Even though I've just been stalking message boards. Just reading that others going through same things has given me a sense of normality in this craziness.

I'm going back to work on Monday. Took 2 weeks off but seriously anxious today about it. I work in health care so have a list of patients that I feel like I have 'abandoned ' and might be angry that I haven't been able to follow up. I've met up with a friend and been shopping so feel able to 'do people in public'. I can normally put my professional 'mask on' quite well but worried it might slip a bit especially if I get the expected and total understandable angry patients .

Anyone got any tips for going back to work? Some people know but I feel that everyone will be staring at me or wondering what ' mystery illness' i have had for 2 weeks. I'm happy to be open about MC but....... also would feel awkward knowing other people know I am TTC.

@Sailawaygirl Welcome! Sorry you've found yourself here. I hope your stay is short :) I'm 36 and there a few other "older" ladies on here so you're not alone.

@lizziecat1 That's exactly it , I'm glad you understand what I mean. One step at a time. Hope you're doing well 💕

@bunnykins123 you never know!! I don't think my boobs were sore at all until after I'd missed AF. When are you due on? Once you conceive how long do you have to stay on the suppressant? Keeping everything crossed for you. Xx

Thank you @HalWin2221 @bunnykins123 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻

@Aprilsunnyday I agree with that! The internet is both a blessing and a curse as it's so easy to find information without knowing how accurate it is! I also know someone who conceived with incredibly low AMH and I read online that AMH alone isn't a barrier to conceiving (it's mainly about ivf egg stimulation as you know).

@RainbowSearching @Fuckallthetories yay to the static smilies! Have fun over the next few days 🙃 fingers crossed this is your successful month!

@Mariabombia thank you! Honestly, I haven't felt think rank in years. I'm 14dpo now. No sign of AF but breasts are no longer sore plus I can't imagine any bean managing to bypass this killer of a bug even if I did conceive this cycle!

Hi ladies. Been reading thread for support. I've just finished bleeding after a medical miscarriage. ( well hope so been a bit on and of for the last 4 days. 8 days post MC ) Was first attempt at TTC fingers crossed for next round. Feeling ticking of clock and feeling old for the first time ( I'm 35). I'm just hoping that period starts soon again so I can get back on track with cycles. Fingers crossed 🤞 🌈

Welcome @Fuckallthetories & @Aprilsunnyday sorry that you have found yourselves here ♥️ best of luck this cycle if you've started ttc again.

@bunnykins123 sorry to hear you are feeling poop :( it must be so hard taking those meds and getting poorly all the time. Where are you in your cycle now?

@Fuckallthetories @RainbowSearching good luck with DTD ladies! Keeping everything crossed & sending lots of baby dust ✨

OMG!! Got a little smiley face this morning! Gonna DTD tonight, I pray this is my month, we’ve been trying for like 6 months since MC in April. Period is meant to be coming on Tuesday 🤞

So the morning after being anxious I wouldn’t ovulate this month I get a solid smiley 😄 My automatic reaction? I wish I’d tested last night as we didn’t DTD last night and it might’ve been posivite then 🙄 There’s always anxiety there isn’t there?! We’re following the SMEP so every 2nd day til the positive OPK.

@FfayeN aww!! ❤️Thats really well said, it's a big hug ❤️🤗
I take a few vitamins, folic acid, Coq10, vitamin D. based on the book, also doing acupuncture (very expensive).
We ve also used fertility and ordered twoplus last month... 😂
I am in my tww now on dpo 8 and have tested negative this morning (shouldn't have but could not help 😂and went through a bit down, will try testing maybe on Sunday...I d report back. :)

I guess coming back to trying has already given just a bit more hope.

Is your thyroid situation in good hands? I watched a YouTube video about it just earlier...we ve all become so knowledgeable on this topic 😁😂
Thanks for checking on me. 🥰

@Fuckallthetories I feel like it’s hard not to be anxious when you know what can happen, sorry for you loss😖

@Aprilsunnyday sorry to hear of your loss and then crazy cycles! That must be so stressful not knowing what’s going on when trying to ttc, sending lots of love xx

Thank you ❤️@bunnykins123, its much appreciated. And I am sorry you were feeling poorly recently, I hope you are feel better and in better spirit very soon. I think supporting means so much.

Yeah to you question, think we would have considered ivf if my Amh was quite OK, it is too low for ivf. The only suggestion we got besides trying naturally was to go through modified natural cycle, but that doesn't really increase the chance by much statistically.... 😑
Sorry if this all sounds a bit depressing.

I am thinking, trying when we can this year, is the way to go? 😎 Then we might need to think other options.
I keep on thinking we got pregnant on a second trial in December, we could be lucky again?!
Hmm its a hard one isn't it 😂but thanks so much!! X

@Aprilsunnyday welcome back! Mumsnet can get a bit overwhelming at times - I dip in and out but used to be more active in the earlier days. Have you considered IVF due to age? I've just turned 38 and whilst all my bloods are normal (apart from high NK cells but that's not related) my cycles are defo getting wobbly so think the peri is imminent. What was your AMH / FSH? That's a good indicator fertility wise. This forum is actually really helpful to just talk so defo keep in touch if you feel up to it 💕

Hello, everyone, let me please make a come back to this very supportive and resourceful group! There was a period i checked out from mumsnet, thought now I am more gathered to come back . I hope it does not bother anyone i have been reading the threads though staying quiet!! 🙇The thing I really like about this thread is its really stable and comforting, everyone is sharing a story and keeping each other going strong in high times and low.

So... a bit of a long intro about me, might be a bit long to scan through even😅 - I had a MMC in Jan at 6 weeks and since then ttc life has been so turbulent... post a long waiting after period came back in April and went regular twice, it went nuts😲- cycle has gone from a regular 29 days to 47, 17, 40, 13 days since July (!), so then not only with my older eggs, i also could not finda time to try.😤 One min, i thought i was in O window and then within next 24 hours, AF arrives. It has been mega confusing for me, and of course my partner, he found me so very "unpredictable!"😂

I've checked multiple times on bloods (baseline FSH, Oestradiol, LH etc) , and talked to different fertility clinics etc. a preliminary diagnosis from doctor in fertility clinic is I am in peri menopause at 40. It can be painfully true but i had my doubts... I had a surge of work related stress in May to July (and busy schedule like everyone else), and i thought miscarriage related hormone changes could play a role too. (?)

Anyhow, I have tried understand about this crazy cycle but it was a bit of a myth till now, so i have decided to respect and work with my body on what it does and doesn't!! Like most of you do, we are back to trying (when we catch a window) and although we feel this road might be bumpy and long, really hoping something could happen naturally, maybe by March next year?! With our odds, its very hard to say, but we ll keep trying and stay on this journey for a bit!!
Hope i get to stay on here for longer without more health scares too!
Congrats to the BFP ones and i root for sticky beans!! 😀 xx

@Fuckallthetories I’m so sorry for your loss. I agree about the apprehension, pregnancy will always feel different once you’ve had a loss

@Fuckallthetories I'm sorry for your loss, it's such a hard thing to overcome. I don't think the apprehension really ever goes 💕

@mummatara same with me - 2 of my miscarriages were 1 only attempts. Weird as I was sure I got my dates wrong. It was the 2nd miscarriage and I had good lines so just thought all was well. Oh how wrong I was! I have read that the pill is good for regulating hormones and quite a few women conceive 1st cycle they come off it!

@bunnykins123 tbf I was that woman 😳 back in March. I came off the pill in Dec all ready for TTC after our May wedding and apparently got my timing very wrong it was 5 days before O too so I mean it's not impossible I was quite shocked 🙈 haha oh yes what were you thinking 🤦🏼‍♀️ the glory days of pregnant and no problems 😭 I sadly couldn't have sent them back because it was a big box but I was thinking I might Chuck them on Fb marketplace glad I didn't now.

@Fuckallthetories welcome sorry for your loss ❤️ it's def hard not to be apprehensive I don't think many in here would manage not to be so you've come to the right place xx

Hello, just popping on. I had a miscarriage earlier this year. I already have a 3 year old daughter and I’ll never forget her face when I told her her baby brother had died . Anyway, we are now ttc for our 2nd lo, and it’s hard not to be apprehensive! Even if I did get pregnant I don’t think I’d be able to be excited until they where born. Good luck and rainbow dust for us all!!

fuck xx

@mummatara haha well you do hear of women getting pregnant from 1 attempt so maybe there is more in your advice than you think 😂 I actually did send back my opks to Amazon after my 2nd pregnancy. God knows what I was thinking!!! 🤦‍♀️

@bunnykins123 I'll be back to it next cycle I still have about 12 CB's to use don't want them to go to waste. I think I must have known because after our positive I looked at them and thought nah I'll keep them just incase 🙄 honestly I think I could happily go about 3 weeks without it 🤣 that doesn't help make a baby though does it so off I trot with helpful suggestiveness every time 🤦🏼‍♀️