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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

41 and still trying! Any joiners

180 replies

ladybuggoldfinch · 19/09/2022 09:08

Good morning! I've not posted on MN for a while as trying to take a more laid back approach but let's face it that doesn't work anymore than anxiously rabbit holeing your way through a cycle either.

I am coming to the end of cycle 2083626480 and I have had all the usual period symptoms! Everything seemed to come together nicely this time so it's another disappointing month. Not tested but know the inevitable. My partner and I have some fertility tests coming up so hopefully some light will be shed on our situation.

I have a 3 year old and have had 3 miscarriages last year.

Anybody in the same boat and would like a friendly thread to share their journey it would be great to hear from you!

OP posts:
gretr · 27/09/2022 20:25

This reply has been deleted

We've removed this post as we think it's a bit insensitive given the topic.

Maybe save your sorrow for the babies that have parents who abuse them, not those who desperately want them.

pheonixyiz · 27/09/2022 20:13

This reply has been deleted

We've removed this post as we think it's a bit insensitive given the topic.

Chasingclouds100 · 27/09/2022 19:58

Hi Honeyfox - would you mind me asking how you go about getting the egg reserve test? Can you get it done through gp or is it private?

thejadefish · 27/09/2022 16:10

Wish I'd known about these groups when I was ttc, it was such an emotional rollercoaster. DC1 took 20 cycles to conceive (finally successful at age 39, although I didn't realise at the time that you could increase your odds/fertile window etc might have been different had I known) and DC2 took almost 3 years. I am 45 now and he is currently 11 weeks old (whilst I wanted to try again when DC1 turned 1, DH wasn't ready until she was 2 although he would have preferred to wait until she was 3 or 4 - he never believed the stats about it getting harder to conceive as you get older). I would have liked another but given my age think I need to be realistic and grateful for what I've got. Wishing everyone the best of luck xx

WonderWoop · 26/09/2022 22:55

Wishing you all best of luck with your journey. I am 39, will be 40 when DS is born. Have DD aged almost 3. Took 2 years to conceive DD and 1.5 to conceive DS. 2 MC along the journey.

Things that helped us... aside from the obvious continual poas... pre-seed lubricant and inositol powder (bought this through bulk powders). Plus baby aspirin as soon as pregnant.

honeyfox · 26/09/2022 22:28

I'll join, 44 and about to start trying one last time after two years of surgery and investigations for fibroids. Conceived first go at 40 but mmc at 10 weeks, possibly caused by growing fibroid which ended up giving me life-destroying periods and lockdown delayed the diagnosis. Fingers crossed as not much time left, although I was told I have the eggs of a 40 year old after the egg reserve test which is reassuring.

zoomies1 · 26/09/2022 22:22

@MrsZinnia thanks. We had a really lovely weekend. I’m almost sad it’s over!
@ladybuggoldfinch trying last time pretty much destroyed our sex life. This time I don’t know if we’ll go for once every two or three days or my preference which is just before ovulation, at ovulation and just after. I don’t think I can force it more than that. It just becomes really tough

Original poster
ladybuggoldfinch · 24/09/2022 14:05

Hope everyone is good! Just wondering what everyone's game plan is during a cycle? Have you tried sperm meets egg? Are there any other random shag patterns you follow? I personally find the constant sex around ovulation a bit much. I think this time I'm going do the deed at peak and day after ovulation and try for normal sex the rest of the cycle!

OP posts:
MrsZinnia · 22/09/2022 19:47

@holidaynightmare that’s such gentle support, thank you.

Chasingclouds100 · 22/09/2022 19:19

Ahh thank you - how lovely!

Original poster
ladybuggoldfinch · 22/09/2022 11:39

@holidaynightmare thank you 😘

OP posts:
holidaynightmare · 22/09/2022 08:42

Hi ladies;

Not from person experience but I wanted to share a colleagues experience with you

She's 44 and will soon be 45
Has 2 older kids, one at Uni one doing A levels.

She thought she was going thru the menopause and she was actually pregnant

It was a huge huge shock but now they are delighted and have a 3 month old baby

It can happen
Just wanted to sprinkle some baby dust on this thread and hope this happens for you all soon 💕 🧚‍♀️

MrsZinnia · 22/09/2022 06:49

@zoomies1 Happy Birthday to your wee man!

I’m in the 2ww, time is really dragging, and I’m absolutely starving which I’m pretty certain means it’s not worked this month.

Chasingclouds100 · 21/09/2022 22:32

I’m 45 and have been ttc for 15 months with no joy

macthekwife · 21/09/2022 21:37

I'm 41 this year. I want another and my husband is younger than me, not sure if that makes a difference. I've been taking my basal at 37 most days, some 35.
Ovulation test positive.
I wish.

Original poster
ladybuggoldfinch · 21/09/2022 21:23

I am still waiting for my bloody period to start properly. But this will be cycle 21 for us 🙈. Not at all the journey I expected

OP posts:
Original poster
ladybuggoldfinch · 21/09/2022 21:21

@zoomies1 I hope this journey is smoother for you!

OP posts:
Original poster
ladybuggoldfinch · 21/09/2022 21:20

@Unicorse sorry for your losses it's so hard to go through. I know if it was just one for us we will have a happy life but I'm not ready to let go of that hope just yet! I wish TTC was not all consuming! Are you still waiting for your blood test results?

OP posts:
zoomies1 · 21/09/2022 21:03

Hi all. Can I join please? I have just turned 41 and have a one year old boy (turns one tomorrow!). We had a very bumpy road getting to number one but thought we would have a go at number two although I have no idea what that will entail…. I have hope though!

Unicorse · 21/09/2022 20:05

Hello, can I join you? I'm 42 with a 3 year old DD. I have had 5 early miscarriages since having DD. I saw a gynaecologist consultant last week after being referred through the recurring miscarriage service. I've had blood tests and now waiting for an ultrasound.
The consultant was actually very positive and said although it's harder at our age, it's certainly not game over just yet.
I'm trying to reconcile myself to only having one child but still track ovulation and obsessively pee on pregnancy tests each month 'just in case'

Original poster
ladybuggoldfinch · 21/09/2022 19:07

Life stressors are shit. I have had a fair share of them. TTC is another to add to the pile. Good luck to everyone. Hopefully we get those bfps soon

OP posts:
MrsZinnia · 21/09/2022 09:53

We’ve been trying all this year, but have had a lot of unexpected life-stress which will definitely not be helping, what will be will be, will hold you all in my thoughts.

strugglingmum82 · 21/09/2022 08:41

Me!

I already have a 21, 20 and 16 year old but would love another. I had a miscarriage last July

Original poster
ladybuggoldfinch · 21/09/2022 08:36

How long has everyone been trying ? For us it's been since December 2020. Fell pregnant within 3 months for the two losses and one month after the final one! So frustrating to now have not even a hint of pregnancy!

OP posts:
MrsZinnia · 21/09/2022 06:45

Hi, can I join you all? I’m 43 next week, my youngest is 3. I’m trying to feel hopeful, my Nan was 49 when she had her only child, my Mum, and up until now I’ve been fertile. The statistics are harsh reading though. I’m trying to focus on my health, losing the stone I need to lose, taking folic acid etc, to help keep my mind off possible gloominess.

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