Bus 9 - Donkey Cart departing soon, all aboard with ivf, pcos, endo, sub/unexplained fertility jump on

@thislittlebird I do occasionally reconsider restarting acupuncture (although it didn’t make any difference to my length/flow) problem is it’s so expensive around here 😔 I couldn’t afford once a week and even once a fortnight is a lot financially! How often do you have it?

Gosh I would def be getting my hopes up if I were you…!!! I can imagine it’s very hard not to!

York will be wonderful, my brother and his gf went recently and had the best time xx

@Misty84 did you find acupuncture helped the length/flow? I had that issue at the end of 2020/start of 21 and acupuncture (or coincidence) did seem to help.

Well, I’m definitely still anxious. It’s cruel because the nearer I get to OTD, the more it feels like it’s possible, and I think a third BFN will hit me harder than the second. Anyway, right now it’s 9dp5dt and I am still without AF (got to 10dp5dt on cycle 1 when a migraine started and I did a test; got to 9dp5dt on cycle two and started spotting and did a test) and on this cycle the spotting that started at 6dp5dt seems to have gone for now, it lasted for two days.

Devon and all the food, drinks and dogs sounds great! I’m sure the niece stuff was hard, I find that sort of age really difficult too. It sounds like you did the right thing though, enjoyed yourself and pushed through it. We’ve booked a weekend in York for December, I’m looking forward to it!

@Sunbird24 Best of luck for this transfer🙏

@thislittlebird How are you getting on with the anxious loo checking?

My AF has just been and gone, no surprise of course. It only lasts 2 days these days (and the second day isn’t much). I can remember when I was young and it would take over a week of my life!
I’m in Devon with my partner’s family and have just been enjoying myself with Prosecco, cider, good food and 5 dogs! Found it a bit hard hanging out with his 3 year old niece, and it made me feel so sad watching him push the pram. But I just pushed those thoughts aside as best I could.

@Sunbird24 ah ok, that must be a lot to process. Hopefully you get the outcome you want from this cycle but either way, drawing a line is probably good for all of our sanity.

@thislittlebird, no this will be my final cycle starting. One way or another it’ll be all over by Christmas.

@Sunbird24 you haven’t had your transfer yet, right? I didn’t miss that?

It’s honestly such a headfuck, so stressful. I have nausea on and off, lots of hunger and I think that’s the prednisolone, I know it made me super hungry before when I was on it. I had spotting off and on from Saturday and AF is due now/tomorrow so I’m just dreading the full flow starting. Feel like I’m going to the loo a lot to check if it’s here.

How is it going @thislittlebird?

Looks like AF is gearing up to start for me tomorrow, 2 days early.

@Alexis7890 that’s pretty good! I hate testing, I’d rather they checked it lol.

Big day for me 😬. Today the aim is to get past the 8dp5dt hurdle. Last two transfers have gone tits up around now, with my migraine or period starting.

@thislittlebird the consultant told me not to test and rely on him doing scans to tell me if it works or not, so I’ll find out Tuesday afternoon! Probably works better for me to have been told not to test anything myself, I am the sort of person who would easily become obsessed!!

Oh, that’s great news @thislittlebird, whatever happens if you get further that’s still a little win

@OrangeBengal yeah I’m on more this time so I guess I’m hoping I’ll get past Monday now the dosage is higher.

No worries @thislittlebird. Have you got extra cyclogest or Lubion around, if you really think this one hasn’t worked, maybe just add some more in as at least then you may get over the period / migraine hurdle and last until OTD, plus that should also tell you if the lack of progesterone is an issue.

Good luck re interviews!

@Alexis7890 thanks! Do you have to test?

Look at all these gorgeous pets, I’m jealous! I think if this is a BFN I’ll have to look into a pet. I’ve been applying and interviewing for jobs there last couple of weeks.

@birdboo sorry you find yourself here again and it’s been so tough, good luck if the plan is to try naturally.

@Misty84 The intimacy thing is hard…we’re almost relieved I think when it’s a transfer month because it’s an excuse not to try. It’s really complicated and I don’t know how, if this all fails, we get to a stage where sex isn’t about failing to make a baby anymore.

@OrangeBengal I haven’t watched that thing yet, I will reply to your DM soon! This week has been packed with interview prep and then the outcomes/discussions.

I don’t feel like this has worked again. It’s hard to explain. I just don’t feel it has. If I make it past 8dpt that’ll be a miracle, I never have so far without a period or migraine.

Morning @birdboo, I don’t really know to say other than I’m sorry that you’ve had a sh**ty time of it. Although the circumstances are different, we’ve recently been discussing knowing when is enough and I think one of the key conclusions we came to is that if you get to a point where you have no regrets then this point might be a good a place as any to stop. So your approach seems sound to me. If you would like support through your ttc from people who have been on their journey for way too long (or so it feels) then you’ve come to the right place. I’m new to mumsnet, but I’m sure there are also more specialist boards out there, if you need support from people who have more similar experiences. Whatever you decide you’re welcome here

@kerrym87 aaah congratulations to little Loki getting to the final! I’m not surprised, he’s completely adorable!

@Alexis7890 It’s tough to remain enthusiastic about intimacy isn’t it, especially when the spontaneity seems to be taken away and we have all this pressure! So I did ok for the first year as we were just “seeing what happens” (nothing!) then I became a bit of a neurotic nightmare with it. I had to stop and realise it was very unhealthy for us so for the next few years I just made sure we were intimate every other day throughout the fertile week (more or less) so that it was covered. We managed fine with that and it didn’t spoil things. However now it’s a bit different because ivf hasn’t worked and my partner has had awful results so he’s not rubbish about himself. So I’m just giving him (and me) some time to recover and not putting ANY pressure on restarting. I have faith that we’ll be ok again. It’s been a tricky one because we’ve been together 3.5years and 3 years of that has been trying to start a family so it’s completely dominated our relationship, I don’t even remember what we were like before! We certainly weren’t fully established as a couple and I remember feeling nervous about starting so soon after we’d met, but I was mid thirties and we both wanted kids. So bloody glad we did start that soon because at least we can’t blame ourselves for leaving it too late. We’ve really done everything we could and that helps a bit. It’s just down to fate now!
So I can really appreciate how you’re feeling when you’re relatively new to this and I would just encourage you to continue putting the health of your relationship first because that’s key to staying sane!!

@birdboo It sounds like you’ve been through an awful lot. I hope your dh agrees as you’ve got nothing to lose by having a go.

Hello there again.

My second time here. Last time I conceived naturally nearly 6 years ago. Since then I've had my right ovary removed from my bowl, bladder and the back of my womb with adhesions. The left was only stuck to tissue. I had ablation surgery in 2019 with an endo specialist and he was happy a lot was removed. He tried to preserve my fertility as much as possible but like all endo it's a guessing game of the damaged. The adhesions were split and ovaries freed but not removed. 3 years later everything is starting to hurt again. I can't afford a private appointment so I'm trying to convince dh that before I start a hormonal treatment to just ttc for one last roll of the dice. If it doesn't happen then at least we tried and it wasn't to be.

Hey @OrangeBengal thats exciting for you!!

I’ve just finished the latest lot of letrozole and find out next week if it worked, I don’t hold out much hope and think I will be moved on from that to injections, the waiting to be told is the so hard right now, patience is not my strength!

sending lots of luck your way @thislittlebird

@Sunbird24 Such unfortunate timing!

@Misty84 how are you doing with it all? We are are fairly new to the whole thing compared to a lot of people here and haven’t got to IVF yet I can only imagine how much harder that is. Intimacy has definitely suffered going through all the tests and assisted conception, being told repeatedly that there’s no sign of ovulation and the meds aren’t working doesn’t put me in the mood at all!

Adorable @kerrym87 and Loki being a finalist is fantastic (good name btw)!

Aw so cute! Our loki is so pampered, actually entered him in cutepet uk competition and he's in final..not a chance of winning but it's nice to get this far with an unusual pet

Yours is lovely too @Misty84. She’s in the bath here, she’s a pretty strange cat!

Oh what a cutie @OrangeBengal!

Here’s my fur baby @Misty84

Thanks for the understanding about intimacy @OrangeBengal @kerrym87. I would love to feel like ‘us’ again, rather than ‘us trying to conceive.’ I’m just going to give him time.
Kerry I don’t know how on earth you work with babies!!! I work with school-age children and that’s hard enough!
So nice to hear about your cat Orange and hedgehog Kerry. We got our dog because of all this and as you can see from the photo he’s our little baby!!! He could not possibly be loved more, he doesn’t know how lucky he is! Best decision we’ve ever made. My partner wants another dog once we move into our house so I’ll just become Crazy dog lady!!

@OrangeBengal were just in the waiting game no mans land and the shitty mood swings and depression after failed cycle. My job on a baby unit is both comforting and torture! I'm sick of feeling negative so going to try thinking positive as the come down of it doesn't work would be the same. Our hedgehog although not overly affectionate gives us something to look after and is so cute definitely makes life easier.
@Misty84 I also have major issues with intimacy now as it's been for baby making so long that the enjoyment has gone and eveb when we feel in the mood there's an empty feeling of what we should have achieved. It gets better over time but I can't stop thinking about the future before we've even finished our journey and I'm torturing myself with thinking too far ahead right now

@Misty84 we got our cat (then kitten) just before starting IVF and she’s provided so much comfort - she seeks us out individually when she knows we need extra care after a failed transfer too. It’s a good place for love to go.

I wish you the best. I’ve always been conscious that nothing is more important than my relationship with my husband, and it hasn’t been easy for us sexually all the time either, ‘trying’ on command is not easy nor sexy, which can be pretty soul and body destroying. You’ll get back what you had in time.