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TTC whilst breastfeeding. Tips, advice and support

744 replies

Porridgeaddiction · 11/07/2022 16:55

Hi all,

There doesn't seem to be a thread for TTC whilst breastfeeding, so I thought that I'd start one. All welcome to jump aboard if that's your journey too, or offer tips and insights if you've managed to conceive whilst feeding a young one.

OP posts:
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26
Billyv · 18/10/2022 17:10

@Orangio I'm only feeding him after 4am now. But he will rock to sleep. Will your DS go to sleep without feeding?

We're actually thinking of some gentle sleep training, but I keep putting it off. He's waking very frequently at the moment and often ends up in our bed.

Ooh good luck to anyone in the 2ww. I am just impatiently awaiting my 1st period. V impatient given I've only been off the pill 10 days hahah! Waiting is the worst.

For anyone who has their cycles back - have you had much success tracking mucus? TMI but I seem to be stuck at creamy. Again, 10 days. Not particularly stuck!

Orangio · 18/10/2022 14:16

Is anyone considering night weaning soon? I'm thinking about it but I'm a bit terrified 🤣 But I am sick of being up every couple of hours every night. It's been nearly a year of broken sleep now! DH and me were talking about it. He has some annual leave coming up which we could use to night wean as he could do half (or even all of it as I read it's easier for the parent who doesn't smell of milk)! But I'm really nervous DS won't take to it.

What's everyone else up to? Aren't quite a few of you in the TWW just now? I can't quite remember!

AnonymousXXIX · 15/10/2022 20:33

@Orangio baby is in own room now, but I am waaaay too tired at night!

Orangio · 15/10/2022 19:20

Oh yikes @AnonymousXXIX you'll never TTC successfully that way 😆 Does your baby sleep in your bed, or is it just the idea of DTD with them about?
It is definitely harder with a little one that's for sure. Mostly because I'm tired from all the night wakings I think! But I really want a small gap between them. My enthusiastic might wane if it takes six months to conceive!

AnonymousXXIX · 15/10/2022 08:52

@Mc3209 thanks 😎 11pm (v unusual), 3am and 6am wake ups today. Baby did not get the memo it's Saturday!

Also @Orangio we only ever dtd when baby is at nursery hahaha, no idea what we'll do when I get my periods back.... Nursery full-time? 😂

Mc3209 · 15/10/2022 08:40

@Billyv I am losing weight when breastfeeding and have to eat a lot to keep it stable in my attempts to get period back. Went as far as getting thyroid checked, but thankfully all is fine.

Now that my first period is finally back, I am paranoid it will 'go away again', or that ovulation would be inhibited, and all the other subfertile things. DS has slightly picked up the frequency of breastfeeding in past few days, which makes me a little nervous too. He is such a boobie monster, breastfeeding makes him so happy I don't particularly want to stop yet.

Re sleep, I stay with him in his toddler bed BFing until he falls asleep, then he comes into our bed around 2-3 am. I am quite envious of people who could just put their DCs into bed and they sleep through in their own beds!
@AnonymousXXIX sending coffee and solidarity.

@Orangio every 2 days! Wow. Hats off to you.
@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 let me know how you get on with stopping BFing to sleep. I might try to follow suit. When are you moving?

Billyv · 14/10/2022 19:35

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 ahh interesting, thank you. Actually those things do feature in my diet anyway - we do tend to eat full fat yoghurt, nuts, cheese etc. And definitely too much chocolate. I do need to look at my diet and cut down some of the fat and sugar at some point. I've always been lucky not to put on weight, but I guess there can eventually be other complications as you age, such as high cholesterol.

2kg isn't too bad 🙂well, I suppose if you gained it in a week that would raise some questions...

I guess I don't have to do anything yet except folic acid and vit D, I'm only a week off the pill!

A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 · 14/10/2022 18:42

Just catching up on the messages. @AnonymousXXIX if pregnancy happened on its own last time, it can do so again. Totally get wanting to start earlier. I've got one that I've unfortunately got into the habit of feeding to sleep just because it's easier - need to change that when we move. Dreading it, think it's going to take a lot (and a LOT of disturbed sleep) to undo.

@Orangio every other day, that's amazing!! Totally agree @Billyv non sleeping babies do make a good contraceptive! ! Yes the thought of morning sickness with interrupted sleep is terrifying to me also. Especially with commuting to work on a train.

@Billyv re the calories from memory I think it was adding in extra nutrient dense stuff rather than gaining weight. I ate a lot of nuts and nut butter, olive oil, cheese, 5% fat yoghurt, fruits etc. There were a couple of studies on it suggesting this stuff was good. I also ate cakes and cookies etc too though! I did put on 2kg, but I've stopped eating like that after my period came back, and it has shifted 🙈

Billyv · 14/10/2022 16:46

@Orangio I had a slow temp rise when I had my son - so it doesn't necessarily rule you out. But broken nights do make temping unreliable.

DS seems to be teething 3 massive molars at once, so ended up having Calpol and milk at 12am. He did then sleep until 5.30, which is a good night for us at the moment. I'm hoping he'll be ok at night again when these teeth come through.

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 mine has never gone to sleep by himself either. Gets very distressed if left by himself in his cot. It's even worse now he can shout for mam mam. Out of interest, do you know what kind of weight gain is recommended to encourage ovulation?

AnonymousXXIX · 14/10/2022 09:28

Yep jinxed it. Woke at 1am and took 2 tries to put back down; then fully awake at 6am 😂Did 9:30pm-6:30am two nights in a row before that. And no, baby has never gone to sleep without being fed or held, unless out on a walk in the pram (normally 20 mins in, due to the rhythm of the walking I think). Does thankfully go to sleep easily though and does long naps, so at least there's that...

Making high calorie porridge for both of us in the mornings but I still lost weight again this week (was up by 2 lbs last week). More biscuits with the morning coffee so!

Orangio · 13/10/2022 12:36

Oh that sounds tough @AnonymousXXIX What happens if you just put him/her down awake but content? Does contentment disappear pretty quick?!

@Billyv not sure to be honest. I had some ewcm, but temps didn't go up right after it, but four days later instead. I don't know if these temps are just high because they were bad sleep nights, or if I actually have ovulated. There's no way I could be pregnant this cycle anyway - everything is still too up and down which indicates crazy hormones 🙄 I'm considering it a reset cycle (it's my first cycle) so we'll try again next month. Maybe if we night wean I'll get more sleep and more reliable temps...

Billyv · 13/10/2022 12:08

Oh my gosh @Orangio well done! Sorry if you've said this somewhere on the thread already but do you know what DPO you are? Do you get bad morning sickness?

Yes in the day yesterday DS had milk at 10am and 7pm. Then at night it was 1am, 3.30am, 6am... Possibly one more time, it's hard to remember? He doesn't always go back to sleep just from being fed, either. @AnonymousXXIX mine has got into the habit of waking for 1 or 1.5hrs in the middle of the night, so I feel your pain. He'll maybe feed to sleep but then wake repeatedly when I try to put him down. We coslept from 1am last night and he was still awake between 3.30-4.15ish.

Having a kid who doesn't sleep really is a brilliant contraceptive. I keep thinking what the hell am I doing signing up for more sleep deprivation!

AnonymousXXIX · 13/10/2022 10:52

I don't want to write it because this will jinx it... but baby has been sleeping okay at night this week, so I'm hopeful that might help the getting-period-back situation. I've only ever managed to rock back to sleep (instead of feed) like 3 times? So sleeping long stretches is a big deal. P.S. anyone else have a baby that wakes up when taken off boob at night? Mine takes a good 45 mins to put back down without waking up...

Orangio · 13/10/2022 08:33

Argh tell me about it! We did actually manage to DTD every other day this cycle, but holy moly it was some effort!

I've been thinking about night weaning too. It is pretty daunting, but the thing that terrifies me most is getting pregnant and having to go through morning sickness without getting proper nights of sleep. So I think I might pick a good time and go for it. Eeek.

Billyv · 12/10/2022 23:53

@Mc3209 yeah I completely agree. I've just rocked mine back to sleep, but if he wakes up again I'll try feeding him. So so tired of these night wakings.

Hehe yes actually finding the time and energy to dtd is not as easy as it once was. By the time we've got DS off to sleep, the washing up is done etc, we're more likely to want to drink tea and stare into space than try make another kid.

Mc3209 · 12/10/2022 17:01

I actually feed more overnight than during day/evening. I have variable/long working hours which means I don't usually feed during the day, but that means he is going for it at night. And I'm too exhausted to night wean 😩 Such an easy solution to just stick a boob in his mouth, and he is off to sleep in minutes. I may change my tune if this will affect ovulation..

But for now I am trying to muster energy to DTD often enough. With variable success 🤣

Billyv · 12/10/2022 16:18

Hi! How's everyone doing?

I've managed to avoid our 3pm feed for the last 3 days which is good... But the nights have been bad! This morning DS had milk at 2.30am and 5am and 6am 😭he's going through a really bad sleep patch.

Orangio · 11/10/2022 12:43

Hi @Billyv and @AnonymousXXIX , good to have you on board!

Billyv · 11/10/2022 11:17

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 ahhrg stupid bf making everything more complicated! Well, I might give it a go and if I get multiple peaks or no peaks give up. Thanks for sharing the info.

@Mc3209 I think I'll be obsessed whatever I do haha! I'm just giving in to it...

I do think my boobs are beginning to feel more like they did pre pregnancy. As in, smaller. So maybe this is a good sign DS is having less milk during feeds.

The idea of weaning is hard, isn't it? You don't want to take away something that provides comfort and nourishment. DS has just started saying milk too. I felt really mean this morning when he was asking for it at 7am when he woke, and I didn't give him any (he'd had some at 5am). I did give him some cow's milk while I was making porridge.

I don't think I have an issue with not eating enough calories haha. Serious sugar addiction here since DS's birth. Which I'm trying to get on top of... I'm my pre pregnancy weight so I'm not overeating, but I'm definitely eating too much crap and not enough good stuff.

I think I might make myself a food/sleep plan to follow...

A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 · 11/10/2022 10:56

@Billyv it said it in a pack I bought. I just googled also and it says the results are invalid. My understanding is false positives, and also breastfeeding can suppress an LH surge and so false negatives also 🤷‍♀️

Yep I think so, as I have several patches of EWCM the last two months

TTC whilst breastfeeding. Tips, advice and support
Mc3209 · 11/10/2022 10:34

@Billyv DS is 2 years old. I am still breastfeeding, but I think what finally brought my period is reducing the frequency. My DS is a boobie monster, it feels like mission impossible to gently reduce feeds. I still feed in the night as well, DS' sleep is not the best 😵‍💫
I am making sure to eat enough calories and take vitamins. I am still on the fence about OPKs, I can just see myself getting obsessive.

Billyv · 11/10/2022 08:41

Hi @AnonymousXXIX 👋

Oh no I didn't know that about OPKs @A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 do you have a link to where I can read about that? Presumably more oestrogen/different oestrogen patterns changes cm as well then... 😐

I'm kind of hoping at 15m in my cycles will just come back. I'm 37 so also feeling that evil biological clock tick

AnonymousXXIX · 11/10/2022 08:11

Hello! Same as @Billyv, thanks for the link @A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 ! 31 with a bf 9 month old, and absolutely no signs of my period. Used to have very short 23 day cycles (short luteal phase) and we have severe male factor infertility, so while not in a rush to conceive again right now - and counting our lucky stars we did to begin with mid-IVF-consultation - I am a bit anxious about giving it another go sooner rather than later!

A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 · 11/10/2022 07:34

Hi @Billyv that doesn't sound crazily hopeful. If you've been on the pill, your cycles may well return immediately.

I'm 38. I thought that opks don't work when breastfeeding as you may get several oestrogen surges? I haven't been using them, and like you, temping isn't working atm with the interrupted sleep etc. I've been following CM and fertility signs but not sure how reliable that is either. Are the Clearblue opks which pick up additional hormones (the smiley face tests) any good while feeding does anyone know?

Billyv · 10/10/2022 22:11

Hi! We were super lucky that DS was conceived about 2 weeks after I stopped my pill. I didn't even have a period. So I was thinking I might start OPKs in around a week from now... Which sounds crazily hopeful. I'm not actually expecting a BFP soon, but if/when I ovulate I'd like to be able to pinpoint it so I can see what my luteal phase is like.

I think bbt is pointless for me as I'm still getting up some nights to settle DS. Plus he always wakes at 5.30am, which is when I feed him and put him in bed with us to sleep for another hour or so.

Otherwise just taking vitamins, trying to eat less crap, trying to sleep more (ha!). Today we went between 10am to 7pm for feeds which is good, but he generally has an afternoon feed as well. I'm thinking I'll start offering cow's milk for the afternoon feed if he asks for milk.

Just scrolled up the thread and saw you've just got your period back - did you do anything specific to encourage it to return? How old is your baby? Will you use OPKs etc or just go with the flow?