The TTC Sanctuary - Let's Talk About TTC... the ups, the downs, the fantasy shopping list that is getting bigger even though our tummies aren't...

aaaw, napa, I look at the pregnany threads too

Obsessed, moi? Nooo. I'm just popping on to learn about what I will be going through. Honest, it's all educational

please could you tell me how to ban myself from looking at the pregnancy threads, i so want to yell at the computer when they're writing about the bumps and babies then i feel really bad and should be happy for them. i found out another friend is pregnant - not sure how it happened we weren't trying - story. AHHHHHHHH. i'm not nuts really

I'm at the SIL story too. I always thought that having struggled so hard to conceive DD that I "deserved" an easier pregnancy and delivery! I then thought having had such horrible bad luck with labour and delivery that I was bound to have an easy baby, as no-one's luck could be that bad!

Am currently trying to keep everyone's expectations low for conception of another DB. It's hard when ILs have stumped up a load of cash for fertility treatment. It's really nice of them, but I do wonder if they know exactly how low our chances are of having another.

Sorry to hear DS got stuck mistle. Sounds awful. Glad everyone is ok though.

My DH sounds like yours. He will consider a birthing center though. I'm pretty open minded. I know what I want when I have a DC, but will do whatever is best for me and the baby at the end of the day. I understand that sometimes you can't always have the birth that you planned.

I'm also planning to try out hypnobirthing.

My local hospital does not have a birthing pool, and has a very high medical intervention rate (something like nearly 90%). When my niece was born my brother and his girlfriend had a horrific experience and, after going through the birth notes afterwards the common consensus was that the birth did not progress at the speed the hospital though it should and so they intervened. It led them both to say they never want another child . The birthing center I like the look of appeals more to me because it is midwife run and has a very low intervention rate, and they even have provisions for DH to stay overnight in the same room should I need or want an overnight stay after the birth. They really try to make it as comfortable and 'home like' as possible

hackneybird - I'm also hoping that m/c has boosted potential - and that reduced angst re possible mp reoccurance this time (only lasted 6wks rather than 3 months the autumn before) means that dh going to be more likely to cooperate. There is only so much you can do if only one of you is actively trying.... However, due to past problems, we've left it until now since Oct just to be sure - and also didn't want a July/August baby really.

Hi everyone,still feeling like crap today but emotionally i'm feeling a bit more positive i think my rant yesterday really helped..........

Welcome hackneybird sorry to hear of your MC i have been there also, i know what you mean about just wanting to get on with ttc.

I felt exactly the same way and consoled myself with something my GP said to me...firstly the fact that i became pg is a good sign fertility also she said most women who suffer MC go on to become pg again quickly........and for me that was true, i MC at 10 weeks and 6 weeks later i was pg again and resulted in my now 8yr old dd. So hang in there, x

Nomore....i can totally relate, everytime i venture near baby stuff i feel really awkward and that i shouldn't be there and everyone is watching me, even though i'm buying a gift i feel the need to explain myself!!

glastochick - our local hospital has the option for waterbirths, and if all had gone well I'd have gone for one.

Dh really not happy to remotely consider home birth - which, as it turns out, was not really an option (ds got stuck - he was 10 5 a week early, so probably not really too surprising). Better luck next time is all I can say.

Waves to all the new joiners

Crikey, I let work get in the way of MN and what happens? Loads to catch up on

viksam it sounds as though you're the same type of person as me . I keep pestering DH to let me leave work so I can rescue animals

Sorry to hear about your MC hackney. Fingers crossed everything goes well for you now.

Ready you didn't come across as bossy at all . And I use Milton too. My parents thought it most odd when they came round one day and saw it on the kitchen counter. I could see in my Mum's eye she was expecting 'news'. I actually took a little vindictive delight in explaining the real reason for its exitence [devil emoticon]. I have cats and a lot of household cleaners contain bleach which is toxic to them as they absorb chemicals through their paws. When I got my youngest cat (the only non-rescue) his breeder recommended Milton. Helps me know that when they are rampaging over the kitchen units while I'm at work they're safe and so are we

nomore as soon as I fall PG (I will, I will) [positive thinking emoticon], can I put in an order for baby uggs?

mistle I love the idea of a waterbirth. It's what I want. DH is a firm believer in hospitals but I know I'd rather stay away unless absolutely necessary. Did think about a birthing center but that would only be if I couldn't get a waterbirth at home (my next door neighbour is schizophrenic and we already have to listen to him replaying arguments or shouting about things that have upset him so worry that we'd have to listen to him replay the sounds of me giving birth for years to come. Gruesome!)

Phew, bit of a long post . So glad it's nearly the weekend!

Nomore - know exactly what you mean - I feel peculiar if I stray away from the areas that are appropriate for ds.

Dh's colleague's baby arrived yesterday.

So I am going to have to go to MOthercare or similar to find appropriately coloured present...

glastochick What you said about looking longingly down the baby isle struck a chord with me - I do that all the time!! I've even ventured into mothercare recently (was buying stuff for godson) but I felt really awkward - like a security guard was going to come and march me out of the store for not having a child
hello hakeneybird viksam napa lauriefairycake and all those I already know too

Hello everyone

Have just popped over from the MC avengers thread . Just had an mc after falling unexpectedly (but happily) pregnant. We were planning kids, it just happened earlier than we thought, but ultimately not to be.

Now we will be 'trying' properly. After being largely ignorant of everything fertility related for years and years, (I'm 34), I know now all about cycle days, EWCM, OPKs etc. etc. And here was me thinking you just had to have unprotected sex!

I'm waiting for my mc symptoms to complete and for my AF to return then we'll be going for it. Although I may not even wait for AF I'm feeling that impatient!

Lauriefairycake, welcome to the thread. Giggled at your , are we really that scary Sorry to hear that you only have one working ovary. You have been trying a long time, how do you keep optimistic? I know that might sound weird, but I am only 17 cycles in and I am struggling at the moment. Any pearls of wisdom?

Viksam, welcome to the thread. Glad that you felt the need to post rather than lurk. Jump in with both feet I say. How long have you been lurking? Sorry your lap and dye has been cancelled, how frustrating. Hope it goes well when you do get your appointment. Sounds like you really have been through the mill.

Napa, I would imagine that being around pregnant women and babies would make it really hard to cope sometimes, but I hope you are ok. This is definitely the best place to let off steam and share how you are feeling. I have MN to be incredibly helpful, I can?t imagine going through this alone!

MT, I will look into the acu I think, if nothing else, to calm me down, I definitely need that ? Yes, you are the voice of reason when it comes to the fantasy shopping. When I finally get there, I shall be running my list by you to see what I really need

Glastochick, pleased to be of assistance , in all seriousness, I would want someone to mention something they heard ? even if it isn?t completely relevant. Hope I didn?t seem bossy. I am terrible in the supermarkets, I use Milton in my kitchen (bit of a fusspot) and so have to go down the baby aisle to get it ? and I must look a total dweeb, gawking at things like rusks and bottles. Probably stand out like a sore thumb

Nomore, pleeeeeaaase may I be first on the list for some of your wonderful baby uggs??? Purlleeeeaaase

Ammy, that spell lady has a lot of good testimonials doesn?t she. It is very tempting. When do you get your spell? Does it come through the post?

Hope everyone is ok?

I've not ever got round to getting ovulation sticks... Ready and Nomore can probably tell you that I don't even have any pregnancy tests in the house at the moment - feels like tempting fate - and won't believe that its sticking for at least 14 weeks, so what's the point in finding out that early - just get hopes up. Sorry, feeling a bit

Viksam - welcome. You're in good company - took 6yrs for #1 and currently ttc nearly 2 on #2...

Grrrr re sil. Just not fair is it!

I'd have the chickens but not the cow - couldn't cope with the problems with calves every year - would be heartbreaking I think... Might cope with goats though. I would like 4 or 5 Indian Runner ducks - I just love the way they bunch together and nearly always look completely paranoid. Ds would love it. He's really good with our dog, and really enjoyed visiting a farm down in Devon last summer (including having his first pony ride - he was a natural!)

Thanks for the welcome chapesses

I just bought the clearblue ones from sainsburys - 7 for £15 - hoping to make them last two months but I've seen them on the net incredibly cheaply. The only reason I bought mine the other day was i bonked and thought the next day "am I actually fertile this month".

The first thing I'm hoping to get a handle on is if I'm fertile every month or just aletrnate months.

Really sorry about your sil viksam (happy too, for her obviously) but its awful to be surrounded by so much happiness sometimes

I didnt mean on this thread, i meant on this forum, this thread has made me want to post and usually i just lurk. Didnt mean any disrespect!!
Also Glastochick a small holding and rescue animals and kids sounds right up my street, i would love that soo much. I would have a big cow for milk and chickens for eggs and a cottage garden for me and a horse! how does that sound?

at last there are some people on here i can relate to. I have been ttc for 3.5 yrs, dont know if its better to write it in years or cycles?? We relocated not long after stopping the pill so put no pg down to stress of moving and new job. I have been having investigations for the last year and in that time changed docs as i felt like i was not going to get anywhere with mine. I have had 2 lap and dye appointments cancelled in the last month, due to this flu being in the hospital, and feel just a bit fed up Lauriefairycake i have been doing what you said, brushing over my dissapointment every month, i dont know if for me its easier that way. I want to get some ov sticks, where did you get urs from. SIL has just had a beautiful baby girl after just getting married, trying desperatly not to be but its hard. The birth was so natural,aparently, that the hospital want to write a paper on it..........tut,huff etc!!God i am a horrid person!!

Hi Laurie - nice to see you.

You do start to ramp things up don't you - we were the same. The funny thing was that, both times I've had a pregancy beyond 7 wks, I had resigned myself to IVF and so we were less paranoid about timings etc as we didn't believe it would happen that way.

What I'm hoping for now is that its soon enough after mc that still have higher chance.

I will have to try to get dh feeling a bit better though as he is all glandy at the mo and won't be in the mood and that will be another month wasted.

I'm 39 btw, and ds was born when I was 36...

Hi laurie- welcome to insanity

ready Acupuncture is lovely!! I've only had one sesh- 2nd one tomorrow- and I feel different already. Cant put my finger on it, just calmer and more together about everything. Its really weird. I fell asleep during the treatment- was so relaxed. Its worth it just for that. Just to feel calm again. I would def recommend it- find a good fertility specialised acupuncturist and get booked in!! What have you got to lose??!!

If anything its made me feel better that I'm doing something positive.

The fertility spell I bought is by Mia- it looked really good. You do have to say something in front of the mirror! Gonna do that tonight. cgi.ebay.co.uk/No-1-Fertility-Spell-by-Mia_W0QQitemZ200192135152QQihZ010QQcategoryZ102517QQssPageNam eZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem There you go!!! Come on girls!!! Lets get proactive!!! ha ha!!

hello everyone,

first time poster on this type of thread (deep breath)

Just didn't want to admit that I've been trying to get pregnant for 3 years this May (when I had my last miscarriage)

I bought some ovulation sticks for the first time this week (only to find out I had the timing all wrong )

The reason I'm coming on here is because I am going to try to keep it uppermost in my mind that I am actively trying to conceive (admitting it out loud) instead of actively trying to conceive but pretending I wasn't as every month I was brushing over my disappointment.

I'm 35 (36 soon) and only have one working ovary so fingers crossed.

glastochick - you don't need to spend too much money on those either! I got a really good book on waterbirth (which is what I was hoping for, although it turned out that the only thing that went to plan was the bf...) and that was it. I did spend the money on going to NCT classes with dh - and I am SSSOOOO glad that we did - when things started not going to plan, at least I knew what the options were and the drawbacks etc so that I was able to make informed decisions. They were also really good at getting dhs involved in the classes and actually thinking about things.

Ready knows what I'm like re buying things. I like fantasy shopping and am quite happy to go there - but I like to inject a little realism. Ds never went into 'newborn' size, and he was only in 0 - 3month for 1 month, so don't get too much too early!

Having said that, everyone should go and have a look at the Ugg boots on Nomore's profile - how many pairs are you prepared to knit Nomore - can we start an order list?

Waves to napa. Crikey, 22 months. I salute you. You must have so much patience

Thanks for the warning Ready. I checked out practically every type in Boots and lots of them have active ingredients other than Guaifenesin. They also stated do not take if pregnant or breastfeeding. Benylin says take advice from a doctor or chemist if pregnant or breastfeeding. After picking up my bottle of Benylin, I headed off to the baby medication section and noticed that the bottle I picked up has twice the dosage of Guaifenesin in it than the children's bottle.

I am terrible though. Looked longingly at dummys and nappies while I was there, and then popped over to W H Smith to look at pregnancy and childbirth books .

I will be able to start spending money on these books soon!

thanks for the welcome ready,
just eventually fell naturally with dd, for the fist year of trying didn't really take notice of cycle etc just lots of bd when we felt like it after a year i was threatening dh with investigations so we got stricter about times of the month etc, so have started doing that this time around already, cd1 today so planning to temp and ?opk this month and see if it works, i work shifts though so don't know if that will be a prob. i know how stressful it is waiting month after month and feeling rubbish about it but trying not to let it show in RL, even DH didn't know how much it upset me. I'm around pg women and babies everyday at work which never helps