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Conception

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Original poster

3catstoo - Over here!!!

309 replies

Ready · 09/01/2008 18:12

Your very own thread

OP posts:
Original poster
Ready · 18/03/2008 19:47

did he not realise before the massage that there would be oil involved. Tut.

I think he needs a dose of reality... sorry, it's wrong of me to say that, but - I had two years off work because we moved, and I had to leave a job I enjoyed, and dh was on short term contracts, and we decided we'd make the most of it...

what I am trying to say is, dh was the only one bringing in the money at that point - and so I took care of the house and him basically - and I know he appreciated everything I did for him, because he told me, often. Now I know I am lucky, and lots of husbands don't tend to notice things... but they need to realise that looking after a house is hard work. AND I didn't even have children!

How old is your youngest? Any ideas what work you would do when you go back to it?

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3catstoo · 18/03/2008 10:54

Thanks for your positive comments girls. DH's attitude gets to me sometimes. He really believes I sit around doing nothing all day and that the house cleans and tidies itself, the food cooks itself and the children educate, comfort and make themselves laugh.

I bought a really nice massage bar for his birthday and surprised him with a full body massage on sat night. I got to his legs and he told me I was doing it wrongly!
Afterwards he said that although the massage was nice he really doesn't like being covered in oil . Last time I make the effort to be nice.

I'm getting used to his critisising (sp?) so it isn't getting me down.

The children tend to be so wrapped up in themselves to notice. Most of our disputes are when they are in bed anyway and never get loud enough for them to hear.

Berber carpet is lovely. Very hardwearing and looks nice too. We had an oatmeal one in our last place. I do miss that. I would like to get that on our stairs eventually.
Happy shopping.

Original poster
Ready · 18/03/2008 08:08

You politely side-stepped the name question... totally understand... but it was worth a cheeky punt

OP posts:
cityangel · 18/03/2008 00:15

3cats big hugs from London... I hope things improve. I agree with Ready you have a big role and so what if earning money isn't part of it, you're job is just as important! Are the kids doing ok do they pick up on any tension or do they just bumble along. I hope you find some cheery upy stuffy
Looking forward to the snow this weekend.

Hey Ready... no my shagpile days have been and gone Just going for the regular neutral fluff as we may need to sell next year. Although we did break the bed this weekend sadly not in any particularly exciting way... dh stood on the wrong bit when decorating and then I broke the other bit trying to dust! It has a fix but if we suddenly find ourselves in a pit in the middle we'll know why

I am in bed and dh is grumpy the laptop has come with... although v. pleased you are back Ready, that is no longer his evening question...

So asta la vista chicos

Original poster
Ready · 17/03/2008 17:26

3cats, I felt quite sad to read that you don?t feel like you have your identity at the moment ? you mustn?t think in terms of being dependent on your dh ? or certainly no more than he depends on you. Only one of you adds to the finances, at the momenbt, but what you do ? looking after the house and the children, if you had to pay someone to do it is worth a lot of money. Looking after your children is one of the most important jobs there is.
How?s the working out going?

City, of course I hope I can?t book a holiday? but all will be revealed by the end of the week, so? not long to wait
Oooh, you think it is a boy too ? can?t wait to find out Any names in the hat at the moment? Or are you keeping any possibilities a closely guarded secret?
With regards to dh, basically, we won?t move again (well possibly houses/towns, but not counties) ? I will be working, and he will look for something close enough to commute ? he has had a rough run the last couple of years, and not many games under his belt ? so will need to take a step back to get back to where he wants to be? if that makes sense?
Hope you find some suitable fluff this week? Are you going for something out and out fluffy? We put a berber weave throughout the upstairs in our last house, softer underfoot than coir/seagrass? easier to hoover than the shagpile tufted types

OP posts:
3catstoo · 17/03/2008 14:18

Hi Ready and City.

Sounds like you are busy City.

Not too tense with DH. Not sure if it's patchable upable (I like that phrase ).
I think it's more likely that we will just PLOD on as we are, no changes and stop mentionning the fact that I don't think things are great.

It will be easier to do that if the 'texting' thing continues as that gives me a bit of a release and in some wierd way makes me feel good about myself (although what I am doing is not good, iyswim).

Things might change when/if I go back to work once all the DCs are at school full time. I don't know how they will change but I'm sure once I have my identity back and am not just a mummy that is financially dependant on her DH, I will see things differently. Have a horrid feeling though that I will be more inclined to put my foot down then.

That's a way off though.

DH isn't too bad over the football Ready. He just keeps saying that they are losing now because of all the celebrating they did a few weeks ago .

Well housework beckons.......
Have a good week.

cityangel · 16/03/2008 23:40

Hi Ready and 3cats... manic weekend finally got online for longer than 5 minutes!

3cats I hope things aren't too tense between you and dh. Are things patchable upable? How is the text stuff?

Ready I hope your dh is doing ok, good luck with finding a new team. Does that mean you may have to move in the summer? Dh is happy with some of the recent results but grumpy about being knocked out of 2 cups
I hope your job start date gets brought forward. Good luck with the holiday booking.

As for me well dh has finished painting one of the two bedrooms and we're moving back in tonight! Having been sleeping on the sofa bed. We decided to get new carpet tonight so off to find suitable fluff next week

PS: Ready, I think it's a boy too we shall see

Original poster
Ready · 16/03/2008 18:02

No, not at all - I am probably too secretive for my own good
Well, defeated. DH not happy. So suspect it is the same your end. Blast. It started off so well!
Hum drum - what's hum drum - remind me of that when I am working full-time and getting cheesed off with hum drum

OP posts:
3catstoo · 16/03/2008 17:45

I don't mind at all. I didn't think of that - silly of me to ask!

Dh isn't watching but keeps checking the score on teletext.

Rained all day here too.

The day seems to have flown by without us doing anything productive.

Back to the hum drum tomorrow.

Original poster
Ready · 16/03/2008 17:41

Glad to hear no argument

I am pretty sure I jinxed myself, because it rained all afternoon yesterday and has rained all day today. Cold, damp and dreary.

I hope you don't mind, but I'd rather not say dh's team, I'd be happy to tell you on CAT, but I fear I would "out" myself on here, as I know friends come on here, but don't know I am on here - hope you don't think I am being a baby And to be honest, you'd probably not have heard of his team - they are not in the top flight

dh is watching spurs as I type - not a happy chappy, so suspect it is the same in your house.

OP posts:
3catstoo · 15/03/2008 20:42

No arguments yet!

It did rain here, hasn't stopped yet.

Who is your DH playing for at the moment then? (not that I know many teams )

Original poster
Ready · 15/03/2008 10:47

3cats, it was lovely to have a break from working this week. Hopefully it won?t be long though before I am working full-time in my proper job, a little bit of a routine will be good for me I think.

You would be on-fire if you lived in the Med

My dh is a spurs fan too, and would have loved to have played for them, sadly that was not meant to be. Where is he is meant to be, only time will tell

It?s great that you are going to the gym, and really enjoying yourself, and also that you have someone in RL that you can share all your feelings with ? it?s great that you can get stuff off your chest, and know she is not judging you!

The weather is not looking brilliant here, but at least it is not raining today! I have cleaned my kitchen this morning, but so far nothing else , so I better get off my back side and do something.

Hope you are having a good weekend, and no arguments

OP posts:
3catstoo · 14/03/2008 19:32

Hi Ready,

I hadn't thought about the meds being so passionate - it must be the heat then.

I can't imagine how I would be if I lived there .

I am working out for me and I love it. I would be at the gym every day if I could. I go with a friend and we have such a laugh. We both have a moan and get things off our chests (mostly me at the moment I must admit). I have told her what's going on and it's such a relief to be able to talk to someone in RL about my current situation both with DH and the other.
she is totally honest with me and hasn't judged me for my recent bad behaviour.

Sorry to hear DH has to look for another club. I'm a bit clueless when it comes to football clubs I'm afraid. DH is an avid Tottenham fan. so it's been a bit up and down for him lately. It doesn't effect his mood too much though so I should be thankful.

Was it good to have a break this week then?

I think the weather will dictate our plans this weekend. Hopefully no arguing though.

Have a fab weekend

Original poster
Ready · 14/03/2008 18:52

3cats, how are you? Sorry to hear that you had a big row, and threatened to leave and also sorry that things are not resolved.

I am pleased that you got the dvd, it?s good fun isn?t it. And I love that your ds does it with you. It will get easier the more you do it, as your fitness level builds. I am with you on the buzz you get from a work out ? that?s how I feel, I always feel great after a workout

I have to say, your dh is a bit mean for saying he doesn?t like you working out ? you should only improve yourself for you? and if you want to then good on you!

I?m not massively well travelled either, I?ve been to Cyprus, in fact, my first holiday abroad was Cyprus, and I loved it ? and we were thinking of going back, but to Limassol rather than Protarus ? but then I saw Madeira and thought it looked wonderful. Had to chuckle at you getting horny on hols ? all that heat does have an effect ? presume that must be with the Mediterranean people are so passionate

Well, I haven?t had any temping this week, which was nice. And my boss rang, they are trying to pull some strings to get me in quicker ? won?t hold my breath though.

What?s the plan for the weekend then ladies?

Dh has to go and meet his bestmate to sort out suits for his wedding, dh is best man (I?ve said that already haven?t I )? then he will be at work, although unfortunately this season is a bust, and he probably won?t play again which means looking for another club in the summer ? doesn?t seem 5 minutes since we were last in this dilemma. But then Saturday night, chilling? Sunday lunch at his mum?s ? joy

OP posts:
3catstoo · 13/03/2008 19:18

Hi City and Ready.

City, I'm pleased your scan went well. Love the pics too!

All of those destinations sound fab Ready.
I am not so well travelled. I do like Cyprus though (when it's not full of Brits trying to make it more like home!)
I guess I like the food too. I must confess every time I've been I always get horny . Must be the heat and the lovely healthy salads.

I long for a holiday like that. Not for a good few years with the childen. Wouldn't be quite the same!!

I'm feeling better this week, despite having a huge row with DH at the weekend when we both threatened to leave . We are friends again but nothing was resolved.

Ready I have been doing the Davina DVD that you recommended. It's quite hard going for someone as unfit as me but I loved it so much that I did it from start to finish the first time I watched it. DS did it with me too (although not properly). I have joined a gym too. so that's all cheered me up. I can see why people get addicted because it has given me a real buzz. DH isn't so keen though as he thinks I'm making too much of an effort to improve myself .
I don't need to lose weight (well not much!) but I do need to get fit and toned. It's nice to have something that is for me too as most things I do are for the DCs, which is cool, but after 9 years I feel I deserve some me time.

Sorry that was a long ramble. a positive one this time - what's going on!

Still mixed up in the 'other' mess but it's all talk, iyswim. And it's keeping me sane (well near enough). Certainly helped my mood this week anyway.

Nice to hear from you again Ready. City and I both missed you .

Keep us posted on the holiday front. I'm so envious .

Big hugs to you both.

xxxxx

Original poster
Ready · 12/03/2008 16:20

Hullo girls... hope you are both well?? What's new?

Corsica idea has been dumped... we are looking at Madeira now.

I have to confess to looking at your profile city and I am so glad I did... lovely pics. I reckon you are going to have a boy (hope you don't mind me offering up my opinion ) Glad the scan went well and you are feeling a little more relaxed now.

I've been busy temping, and knitting and all the normal stuff

Went to see Be Kind Rewind at the weekend, brilliant!!!

OP posts:
cityangel · 08/03/2008 01:18

Oh Ready pleased you missed us We'll always be here. I thought you might be sick of me popping back in here posting. I still don't feel right over in the pg thread. Nice bunch but I got really used to ttc mode.

I hope you've got a fun weekend planned looking into holidays. Haven't been to Corsica but its meant to be really nice.
www.tripadvisor.co.uk/Tourism-g187139-Corsica-Vacations.html
You could also spend time in Nice, the South of France is lovely! You could do the whole french maid thing ! Being best man is a tough job he'll need some rest!

Scan went well, all measures ok. The head is big and legs are long we are both tall and my dh has a big head.... We wanted to get a nice photo but he wasn't having any of it. Hands in front of the face despite walking round the block and eating sugar which were meant to help still just pleased with the readings. Will try and relax a bit more now, so far I've just found being pg a worrying waiting game.

Let us know where you're heading on hols, 3cats do you have any trip planned or recommended places to go? I'm off to dream of the beach!

Original poster
Ready · 06/03/2008 23:29

So sweet of you, and your dh to miss me. I have missed you too

dh locked himself out today, last week got half way up the m6 and realised he had left his wallet at home - no jelly eating though

Thank you for your holiday links... this year we are thinking of Europe as we will only get a week (dh is best man end of june, and as you know, he gets a limited amount of time off in the summer) away. Have you been to Corsica? I liked the look of it, and I could have a go at speaking the language too Definitely some "bunny" action will be on the cards though

Good luck tomorrow, I am sure all will be well - let us know

OP posts:
cityangel · 06/03/2008 23:21

Oh my god Ready I missed you xxx dh did too says hello... he asks me every evening if you've popped back in!

Sorry to hear your dh locked himself out! Ask him if he's been doing stupid things like traveling in the wrong direction and eating lots of jelly... he may need his hormones checked

Holiday sounds like a great idea! I recommend Rodney Bay in St Lucia... The area is lovely? there are lots of hotels (you want the ones located on Reduit Beach)
There and nice restaurants to walk to and the area is safe. There are boat tours to other bits of the Island or you can get a cab.

We stayed here: www.expedia.co.uk/pub/agent.dll/qscr=dspv/nojs=1/htid=119616

This gives you an idea of what it looks like: www.stayinstlucia.co.uk/rodneybay.html

Restaurants recommended: Charthouse www.frommers.com/destinations/stlucia/D40072.html
www.gowealthy.com/articles/826/index.asp

Things to do there:
www.stlucia.org/activity/default.asp

I highly recommend the Gros Islet Friday night jump:
www.stlucia.org/activity/nightlife.asp

Or find a Villa with a pool in South of France/ Italy and like bunnies...

I hope the job is good when it starts

I went swimming again today and trust me I do not look glowing. Unless you count the traffic light style very [whispers] back acne I have developed from nowhere

3cats are you feeling ok still? Any news? Any plans for the weekend?

Whispers... wish me luck... scan tomorrow am v nervous...

Original poster
Ready · 06/03/2008 20:43

PS. City, dh locked himself out today too - hope it's a good fertile sign

OP posts:
Original poster
Ready · 06/03/2008 20:42

Hi girls... just popping in really briefly. Wanted to see how you both were, and couldn't just lurk and not post hello.
Sounds like you are going through the mill still 3cats, I hope you are looking after yourself - I echo everything that City has said. Big hugs.
City, half way!! How exciting - time just flies doesn't it! Had to chuckle at your big bump tale - I am sure you look lovely and glowing

No news here, still temping and waiting for the clearance - am hoping it won't be too much longer, but we are looking at brochures and going to have a good holiday this year whatever happens! Something to look forward to

xx

OP posts:
cityangel · 04/03/2008 23:32

Wow no snow here... mind you never snows here and if it does everything grinds to a halt!

I hope it lifts your mood too

I am in dappy hormone world. I locked myself out today!

3catstoo · 04/03/2008 08:15

It's finally snowing !!!!!
It's just started, quite heavy too.

The children think it's fantastic that they are going to walk to school in the snow.

Hope it sticks.

3catstoo · 03/03/2008 09:06

How sweet of your DH. Did you have a good lunch with your friend though?

I kept busy yesterday. The children were a bit grumpy because I didn't want to do what they wanted and DH said it was my choice as it was Mothers Day. They were soooo grumpy all day.

DH was very kind and did a bit of ironing for me - a first!

Today I have a bit more time on my hands to think - not a good thing. Heaps of housework to do but no motivation.

Have a good week.

cityangel · 03/03/2008 00:16

Thanks 3catstoo... I went for lunch with my only RL pg friend and was wondering why dh was being funny about it... found out he had secretly booked lunch and was grumpy I hadn't kept it free! Still no harm done and then my brother cooked the family + new girlfriend dinner so hectic but v. nice....

I got a secret m day card that made me cry but then everything makes me cry at the moment!

I hope you're sat was relaxing Looking forward to catching up next week. Hi to Ready if you're there xxx