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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC 1 year+ Rant!

61 replies

RoseGold24 · 02/04/2022 09:27

Sorry for the absolute rant, I just need to let off steam and talk to someone who feels the same or who has come out the other side!

I appreciate it's not long compared to some but we've been ttc 13 cycles now and I am just at a point of anger rather than upset anymore. From day 1, I've taken so many vitamins, soy isoflavones etc that I'm rattling. Acupuncture - on it. Alcohol intake isn't perfect but I certainly don't have as many wines of a Friday evening as I would like! Ovulation sticks - again been using Clearblue digital for MONTHS. We can't really try not tracking because my partner works away at times and we need to make sure we get the right days...

I'm 38, my periods are regular, only issue is spotting. My acupuncturist told me to eat less sugar and improve my circulation to address this. Honestly I struggle to give up sugar because it's the only friggin pleasure left when ttc! I hate the thought that I can't have a baby because I eat too much chocolate?? My weight is average (high side of 'normal' bmi. Basic tests are normal for iron, thyroid function, and day 21 suggests that I am ovulating. I drink 2l water and a mug of bone broth every day, plenty of green veg and fruit... I'm out of ideas.

My partner is 43, keeps fit and eats well... we're on a waiting list for a fertility clinic. This month my bbt dropped about 4 days ago and has stayed low, and the spotting continues to limp along. Every month I have the pathetic excitement of "this might be an implantation bleed!" But this month I finally accept it isn't.

If you've read this far thank you. All suggestions/hand holds welcome!

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Original poster
RoseGold24 · 07/04/2022 11:24

@PennyPencils and did you get a bfp too!?

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PennyPencils · 07/04/2022 10:46

@RoseGold24 brilliant news. Congratulation
I did my 1st thread this month too so perhaps there's something in it 🤣

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 07/04/2022 09:37

@FlyOnTheWall89 it's bizarre because all my googling indicated temps ALWAYS stay up. But keeping my fingers crossed 🤞🏻 I got my bfp at night 13dpo. Hadn't tested before then! Trying really hard not to POAS daily to check for line progression so not tested again since Tue. I spotted from 8dpo (light & pale brown) but seems to have stopped now (16dpo). My boobs are really sore and I've had a sore back. I get both of those with PMS and they've just carried on but a bit worse! Also had a few big spots on my face around the time AF was due. I haven't been sleeping well, not sure if that's a symptom or anxiety 🤷🏼‍♀️

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FlyOnTheWall89 · 07/04/2022 09:16

@RoseGold24 ye I agree - I didn't know low temps could then equal a + but equally it defo isn't an exact science! Many many congratulations - did you have any symptoms ? How many DPO were you when you got your positive? X

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 07/04/2022 08:28

@FlyOnTheWall89 I didn't actually sorry! I'm still confused by those temps... I gave up regularly temping months ago and my cover line was 36.5. I don't know if this is the same or different for everybody? I just dip in and out when my period is due now. So when I temped last week I had 28/3: 36.62, 29/3: 36.46, 30/3: 36.41 31/3: 36.28. Then gave up in a huff! Bfp was Monday evening (4/4) with a clearblue one (one that just shows the line) then I did the digital on the morning of 5/4. I thought an implantation dip was only one day so it is making me a bit anxious!

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FlyOnTheWall89 · 07/04/2022 08:17

Congratulations @RoseGold24 defo gives the long time triers hope. You must be so happy - even though it is also just the next worry. I didn't comment above but read the thread last week. I'm on month 13 too now for baby #1. Did you keep temping in the end by any chance? I'd be really keen to see your chart? X

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 07/04/2022 08:07

Sorry maybe it's insensitive to post that pic on this thread but maybe it will give a wee bit of hope. I was at the end of my tether. I want everyone to get their bfp asap xx

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Original poster
RoseGold24 · 07/04/2022 08:05

@Peonies94 So, this happened 😱I'm in shock. Maybe starting a new thread on Mumsnet to rant is the key to success?? In seriousness though I am crippled with anxiety as it's so early x

TTC 1 year+ Rant!
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Peonies94 · 07/04/2022 07:00

@RoseGold24 I know! Have you had tests? Where are you with everything?

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 06/04/2022 22:27

@Peonies94 oh that's so disappointing! 20 months is a long time to wait it out!

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Peonies94 · 06/04/2022 21:48

Yes, due to my really irregular cycles I had random day bloods, a scan and Been told to wait another 6 months to see if they regulate!

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 06/04/2022 20:59

@Peonies94 it's heartbreaking isn't it! Have you been to the doctor?

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Peonies94 · 06/04/2022 20:38

Been ttc for 14 months! Really irregular cycles makes it so difficult! Have tried lots of vitamins, ovusense, SMEP (3 cycles) it’s exhausting and so disheartening when it doesn’t work!

PennyPencils · 04/04/2022 16:49

@RoseGold24 absolutely! ❤️

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 04/04/2022 13:24

@PennyPencils you're right I do have a lot of other things to be grateful for. But no harm in trying everything else first!

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PennyPencils · 04/04/2022 07:40

@RoseGold24 it'll happen. A while ago I got my head around the fact we might have to do IVF and just felt determined to not give up until we'd tried everything.
I also try to tell myself if we can't, we have a lovely life and are very lucky and I spend a lot of time with my little neices so get to do all sorts of cute things with them. (It's not the same is it of course, but I try and have a word with myself)
I had my daughter in my early twenties. Unplanned, then was very soon a single mother. It was tough. Now I have a lovely partner and we have a good life and are set up to do this but maybe I'm just too old. Can't help but feel sad about it if we can't.
Am very grateful for my child though. She's everything to me but I don't want her to be alone when we aren't here

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 03/04/2022 16:38

@PennyPencils I'm the same, feels like a race against time! I get so mad at myself but I just wasn't ready before. I didn't see myself being a mum when I was in my 20s. Regret it now!

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PennyPencils · 03/04/2022 16:34

@RoseGold24 can't blame you, even if to rule it out, it's not not bad idea to get the scan.
I've wondered if I have endometriosis as they have been so painful in the past but actually the past few months have become lighter and shorter. I'm frightened I'm going to hit menopause before I conceive at this rate!

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 03/04/2022 16:15

@PennyPencils ⬇️forgot to tag whoops

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Original poster
RoseGold24 · 03/04/2022 16:14

Yeah it feels hard to maintain. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you! I have booked a private fertility scan. Seems a bit cheap so I'm slightly suspicious haha. I'm not flush by any means but this might answer some questions. If I have endometriosis or something else structural we certainly wont be able to afford private treatment so it'll be back to good old NHS waiting 🤣

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PennyPencils · 03/04/2022 16:05

@RoseGold24 there's been plenty of months when there's been lots of alcohol, caffine and sugar but I've been reducing these more over the last few months and this month, I've just been as strict as I can. Not sure if I can keep that up going forward though if I'm not pregnant this cycle.
Well. We'll see.

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 03/04/2022 09:19

@PennyPencils just looking back on your post and you have done so much- no alcohol, no sugars, no caffeine, you've been a model mum to be! It hurts to go through effort when most people don't seem to have to think about it.

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Original poster
RoseGold24 · 03/04/2022 09:17

@PennyPencils yeah it's the worst bit isn't it. I'm on 12dpo, period was due today but I've been spotting for 5 days. I know I'm out because temp dropped 5 days ago and stayed down for a few more days. I stopped temping after that. It's nice that the person who scanned you was excited to announce you were fertile but really really crap when it has translated into nothing.

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PennyPencils · 03/04/2022 08:35

@RoseGold24 I've only been scanned at the gynea so far and he excitedly told me I was fertile.
We mentioned to the GP and he said come back at two years no luck.
We going back if not successful this month. I can't wait any longer.
I've also really had no alcohol this cycle when usually I have a bit but take it easy but occasionally have a maybe more than I should for ttc. But it has been a long time.
10dpo now. This is the most anxious .longest fee days of every month.

Original poster
RoseGold24 · 03/04/2022 07:51

@PennyPencils ah I could have written this post too! Haven't had caffeine for months and I go to yoga every week. Every week I'm spending money on a new thing that worked for someone else once upon a time. So frustrating and I take it as a personal insult when someone I know has a baby 🤣Which I know isn't fair but I can't help it! Have you had any tests? I'm on the NHS waiting list but tempted to go for a private scan, just so I know if there's anything I need to deal with.

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