Medical termination and ttc

@Hopingforbetterluck I've just filled out the online new pregnancy form. It felt weird to log in and see the information from Feb all there on the screen saying delivered at 18weeks 😭

I think if you feel there is a need for the scan they should be trying to accommodate you. I say this now but I'll probably be saying the same thing after mine when they won't give me one either!

@HoneyPea our 12 week scan was with a sonographer and then the consultants dept called that afternoon to book me in for a scan with them. As harsh as it sounds I just figured they didn’t want to waste the consultants time without checking it was a viable pregnancy with a standard scan first. I did ask today if we could have a detailed heart scan in a few weeks but he said there was no need. There feels like a need to me but medically apparently not!
In your case I’m sure you could push for a NIPT if it’s not offered as they can test for T21 with NIPT so you’ve got grounds to ask for it x

@Hopingforbetterluck I was hoping they would offer the NIPT and an extra heart scan as our baby had T21 and associated bad heart issues, cystic hygroma and membrane issues. Was your 12week scan with a consultant or a sonographer?
Is there no way you could ask them to do a detailed scan on the heart to relive your anxiety?

@HoneyPea it’s probably only natural that you’re both worried. I expected more extra support than we’ve had TBH we were pretty much left alone until the 12 week scan. I looked into paying for NIPT privately but as I understood it it really only looks for the main Trisomy’s and that wasn’t relevant to us. It’s probably worth paying privately if you can find a clinic that would test for the particular issue that affected you though.
I’m not too happy at being discharged as I was hoping for an extra heart scan (the chromosome issue in our last pregnancy caused issues with baby’s heart). I suppose if I feel I need that extra reassurance I can always pay for another scan before our 20 week anomaly one. Is just so hard isn’t it, all the what ifs and questioning everything x

@Hopingforbetterluck Still feeling nervous. Had a chat with DH and he's feeling very worried to. Wondering if we get any extra support (offer of NIPT etc) I don't think I would go for CVS if 12 wk scan looked ok either thinking about it.
How do you feel about being discharged?

@HoneyPea yes thank you, everything went well. The scan looked normal and I decided against having a cvs after talking it through with the doctor. If I change my mind about further testing I can have an amnio after 16 weeks but for now they’ve discharged me to normal antenatal care with no extra scans or anything. 🙁
How are you feeling today now it’s sunk in?

@Hopingforbetterluck Hope everything went ok this morning x

@Hopingforbetterluck Thank you so much 🥰 and the same for you. Whatever you decide to do tomorrow will be the best thing for you and your baby x

@HoneyPea it was the same here, we weren’t even supposed to be trying until we’d been on holiday and in the end I didn’t tell DH until we got home as I didn’t want to ruin his holiday with worrying. It’s hard not to worry but I actually managed to put it out of my mind quite a lot until I had the 12 week scan so you might surprise yourself. I just focused on DS and keeping busy! I’m here whenever you want to chat or rant or get anything off your chest x
I’m very nervous about tomorrow, more than I was about my 12 week scan for some reason but it’s first thing in the morning so at least I won’t be waiting around.

@Hopingforbetterluck I've had a sugary cup of (decaf) tea and I think I've stopped shaking! It feels crazy quick after only deciding to try again a couple of weeks ago, wasn't expecting anything yet. I'm guessing the worried feeling won't get any better 😳
How are you feeling about tomorrow?

@HoneyPea oh wow, congratulations, that’s a strong BFP. How are you feeling, are you ok? I know in our situation as much as you want a BFP it can throw you into a bit of a tailspin when you actually get one. 💐

@Hopingforbetterluck

@HoneyPea I’ve got my fingers crossed for you getting your positive and if it’s not your month enjoy your day of drinking with DH tomorrow. I’ve been on the alcohol free beers this week in the heatwave we’re having here!

@Hopingforbetterluck It's so hard isn't it. You want that reassurance but actually at the same time are scared to let yourself believe everything could actually be ok because what if it isn't!
AF is due today but I'm supposed to be out drinking all day with DH tomorrow so think I will do one today just to be sure.

@HoneyPea it’s good that you feel ready to start trying again. Are you thinking of taking a test if you’ve been feeling a bit sick? It’s difficult when all you want is a baby but then don’t actually feel happy or excited to be pregnant. If anything I feel worse after the scan because I feel like I’ve been given hope and I’m scared it’ll be taken away again. I’m worried when I go for my scan they’ll say there’s no heartbeat which is more a fear from my miscarriages not the TFMR but it all adds up to be quite stressful.
I am leaning more towards not having the cvs but I don’t think I’ll actually make a decision until I’m sat in the consultants room tomorrow and talk it over with him.

@Hopingforbetterluck we made the decision to start trying again this month and I've been feeling sick the last few nights and I'm stressing about the thought of possibly being pregnant so I really cant imagine how difficult it is for you.
Are you any closer to making a decision? X

@HoneyPea thank you. I don’t feel excited or relieved that the scan was ok so far. It still feels very early to me and I feel like I’m just waiting for something to go wrong as it has the last three times.
I had a cvs for my TFMR but the consultant at the time pointed out to me that the chances of something being wrong with the baby were far higher than the chances of a miscarriage from the procedure (1/16 vs 1/100) so I felt comfortable having it. This time as the scan looks ok I’m really confused about what to do. DH has also said this is it for him and if anything went wrong he doesn’t want to try again as it’s just too hard. This is our fourth and final roll of the dice so to speak so I don’t want to take any unnecessary risks iyswim.
the consultant was helpful last time so I will talk it over with him but just wanted some opinions from people who might face the same decisions in the future, although I completely understand it’s hard to say what you would do - I can’t even decide what to do and I need to make the decision by Thursday.

@Hopingforbetterluck Congratulations, how are you feeling about it all?
I'm sorry I didn't see your message earlier have you made a decision about the CVS? To be honest with you I have no idea what I would do (I know that's not helpful sorry) On one hand I would want it to rule out the possibility but on the other I would be scared of something happening although the chances are extremely small. Did you have a cvs last time? I had an Amnio for my TFMR baby. Sending you lots of love x

Hi ladies, I hope you’re all doing as well as can be expected? I’m sorry if I upset anyone posting this on here, it’s just you’ve all been in my past situation and I don’t know who to ask for advice. If I upset anyone please let me know and I’ll delete if I can.
I am now nearly 13 weeks pregnant following my TFMR in feb. My dating scan looked ok but I’ve been given the option of having a CVS next week given my past. I really thought I wanted to have it to rule out the 1% chance of the genetic issue from last time happening again but now I’m not sure. As I’ve had miscarriages in the past the possibility of the cvs causing a miscarriage scares me. Does anyone have any thoughts, I’m completely torn.

@Hopingforbetterluck 💐

@HoneyPea we scattered our little boy’s ashes at a local beauty spot so on his due date I’ll probably go there for a while but other than that I haven’t planned anything. So few people knew I was pregnant because we’d been very private about it due to our previous losses so I’m not sure anyone other than me will even remember it’s his due date and that makes me sad.

@Hopingforbetterluck we are halfway through getting the kitchen redone so need to get that finished first, it just seems to be taking ages but then I think I might start trying to tidy and de clutter everywhere. We told DS he would need to move rooms, now he keeps talking about it and asking when it's going to happen so his new room might be a project for when he's at preschool.
Have you decided to do anything to mark your babies due date?

@HoneyPea I’m sorry you’re struggling. My due date is coming up too in a couple of weeks and I don’t know what to do with myself. I’ve decided to redecorate the house to distract me. Could you take on a bit of a project like that to keep you busy while DS is at preschool? I’ve kept a maternity dress that I never got to wear from two pregnancies ago and I see it every time I open my wardrobe. It’s strange isn’t it, the things that can upset you.

i didn’t have to make that decision but I did face a medical termination due to high NT which we would have had after testing. Mother Nature made a decision for me and I lost one of my twins. All I can say is I hadn’t realised how many of us go through loss for a medical reason and how hard it is. Sending you lots of hope for the future .

@Hopingforbetterluck I'm glad you had a nice holiday, it's nice to have a change of scenery 😊
I'm feeling a bit better physically now thank you, still keep getting the feeling of having an infection every few weeks though which is rubbish!
Struggling a bit mentally as some big events that were going to be very close to my due date are coming up, DS birthday and settling in days at preschool. I had picked out a nice maternity dress for his birthday which I now don't need and don't know what I will do with myself for the days he goes to preschool as I was meant to have a baby to look after 😞😢 x