All I want is a baby!!!!

@SunshineS1 I feel your pain. We're on cycle 43. I can't even believe I just wrote that. Fuck. I've had surgery for a cervical cyst, I've been on clomid and progesterone, Dh has has SA, I've had a tubal patency test. All perfect. But still no baby. I hope it happens for you soon.

They found out I had a high number of NK cells in my uterus which was easily treated with some low dose steroids. This was a private test I had done by Professor Siobhan Quenby. You’ll find some info on it all if you Google it. Interestingly I also have a history of overactive thyroid. Do you have graves?

@SunshineS1 it’s very frustrating and I can’t for the life in me not think about it, the constant “oh stop thinking about it and it’ll happen” or the “maybe you should start eating a bit better” is just very very tiring to listen to😂

Ovulation is today so I’m entering my tww tomorrow and I’ve done more bd that I think I have in my whole adult life😆 so I’m keeping everything crossed!

Good luck to all of you ladies, I hope we get our bfp’s soon!🤞🏼x

@SunshineS1 thank you! We are so happy and so excited but I don't think either of us actually believe we're going to be parents in 4 weeks 😬😂. No we're having a surprise, its sort of been torture not knowing, but it's really adding to the excitement now (and I read it's a good incentive during labour 🤷🏻‍♀️).

Definitely have a break if you can - even if it doesn't physically make a difference we put ourselves under SO much pressure ttc, anything that makes you feel better is absolutely worth it.

One thing that I found made me feel better was when AF arrived I'd let myself wallow for a day and be really sad, and really bl**dy angry, and then the next day I'd force myself to think that, however it was going to happen, we were now a month closer to having our baby, rather than focussing on how many months in we were.

@polavary what did you do for SA? Did you go through gp?

I’m 7 cycles in and no sign of a BFP yet. Thinking of getting tests privately. We had my DHs SA done as that’s an easy and cheap one to do and rule out and he’s fine so any issue is on my end if there is one. Not sure when to start officially panicking but I think about it constantly and am quite worried. Also don’t talk to anyone except DH about it and a lot of people around me seem to be getting pregnant on their first month of trying

I hear you!

Only x4 cycles so far but have found out I have an issue which will likely affect implantation, so we'll keep trying but it feels hopeless. IVF will be ruled out due to this too I believe.

DP has children from previous relationship so it upsets me to think that we may never have a child together.

Also in agreement that social
Media can make things harder, whilst being happy for friends it's still tough to see pregnancy announcements.

After 2.5 years of trying I'm currently 6 weeks. Completely out of the blue BFP this month with a phonecall to say we are at the top of the IVF waiting list just a week later ironically (I have a blocked tube).

Things honestly can happen when you least expect it. Over Christmas I was eating rubbish, being lazy, not taking vitamins, drinking more alcohol, only DTD 3 times in that month and had Covid so the odds were not in my favour but it happened.

The wait is awful, the feeling of failure and disappointment when AF arrives time after time when you've had every symptom under the sun is horrendous but don't give up hope 💕. Try and stay distracted and try to not put your life on hold in the mean time.

It took us 15 months after a MC and had SA, HSG, bloods etc, which all came back normal. I'd actually given up hope.

The point of that absolute essay 🙈 was to tell you not to lose hope - when I had my MC I was convinced I'd be pregnant again in 3 months, then 6, then that there was no way I wouldn't be pregnant by a year, and by 2 years I'm sure our chance of conceiving naturally according to the stats was down to something ridiculous like 2%.

By saying I stuck two fingers up at it in our last cycle is also in no way me saying 'Stop thinking about it/it'll happen when you least expect it/just have more sex' and all that crap people who have no idea what you're going through spout, but just to give yourself a break - you don't have to do everything perfectly every single day, or blame yourself if it doesn't happen that month when you had an extra cup of coffee or missed your vitamins one day!

@SunshineS1 I fell pregnant the first month we started ttc, had a very early MC and then absolutely nothing for two years. I found it very hard to access NHS support (and felt quite guilty doing so) when we hit one year because of the pandemic, and my DP is so laid back he's practically horizontal, so it wasn't until we were about 20 months in that we started to get out tests done privately, all of which came back perfectly normal (or actually very good). The last option we had before officially starting treatment was a HyFoSy in March, and I actually cried when the technician told me they wanted to use my images for training because they were so perfect 🙄. They told us to wait one cycle after the procedure before ttc again, and we agreed we do two cycles after that before getting help.

Our last cycle I had a fortnight off work and after two years of living perfectly in ttc terms I basically got the right hump - I stopped waking up at the crack of dawn to take my temp, stopped symptom spotting, ate and drank whatever I liked (including drinking champagne in a hot tub post ovulation 😳) and told myself to enjoy myself before the stress of fertility treatment. Took a test at 12DPO purely because I was going to hot yoga that night, and got my BFP. Didn't even tell DP for 3 days because I just didn't believe it...and actually now I'm 36 weeks I still don't really believe it!

I’m in the same boat, been trying for around 9 months… my bestfriend gave birth to her third baby in September, I’m obviously very happy for her and love all her children to bits BUT I can’t help be devastated by the fact none of these children were planned and she seems to be the most fertile person I’ve ever met (3 children in under 6 years, it’s gutting😩)

I even tell her (in a jokey way) that she needs to let me have a go next… she fully agrees as she now has her hands full😂

I just really want it to be me next and can’t help but feel slightly annoyed by it😔x

Same boat @SunshineS1. Trying since March 2020. I know why (don't ovulate) but the NHS is taking forever to actually offer anything for it.

@CSR721 yes it's almost like you breathe a sigh of relief for a few days then when you think about it, you get more frustrated that there's not something wrong that's a quick fix to explain why it's taking so long!!

Fingers crossed for you too @BritInNZ 🥰 glad your investigations came up clear, I can imagine it being more frustrating though!

@SunshineS1 ahhh bless him that must've been so disappointing 😞 good that he's willing!!! I've been eyeing up the Conception vits too, are you taking much? I bought all sorts but never remember to take any 🤦🏻‍♀️ I'm thinking of trying the conceive plus, I think they do a bundle with mens and womens. That sounds great tbh. I am open with my friends about ttc but as none of them are I think they get sick of hearing about opks and periods and luteal phases 😂

We tried for 2 years op, got referred, we got diagnosed with unexplained infertility and went on to have IVF. I now have my little boy.

It's the hardest journey trying to conceive and it does take over your life doesn't it.

It's good you've started the investigations and have been referred.

Wishing you lots of luck.