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Conception

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Original poster

Having trouble pinpointing who could be the father of my unborn

38 replies

Dricka86 · 18/01/2022 17:47

I was in a marriage for 8 years until my husband decided to leave to go be with another women. So we went our separate ways and finally I started seeing someone that I enjoyed. I met him in September and my husband and I spilt in Aug. Never did anything with my friend because I was still messing around with my husband. Until I did. I had intercourse with my husband on 12/25 and had intercourse with my friend for the first time 12/30 and 12/31. Did not use protection :( So my cycle started on 12/18 5 days and the length of my cycle is 27 days. It states on my app that I have been using not to get pregnant for 4 years stated that ovulation was on the 12/30. My husband did not pull out or anything like that. Now, my friend did on both days and he made sure of it every time. Can someone help me?

OP posts:
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WeeFae · 19/01/2022 13:41

In your previous posts, you said you were TTCing with your DH but it wasnt happening or there was some infertility. Is this the case?

whatfreshheck · 19/01/2022 10:27

@Arabelladrinkstea

Logically because you’re new partner withdrew and your husband didn’t then surely your husband is the most likely, that’s where I’d bet on anyway! However as others say, you won’t know until a dna test.

How are you feeling OP? Do you want the baby?

Withdrawal isn't fool proof and is a deeply flawed method of contraception. It is as likely to be the friends and it is the husbands.
Derbee · 19/01/2022 09:52

I don’t know why you’re being tetchy when someone suggested an STI test. An undiagnosed untreated STI could be harmful to your baby. And you clearly thought you needed an STI check too, as you had one in Jan?

As PP have said, you’ll need a DNA test. You can do an antenatal one

Crowdfundingforcake · 19/01/2022 09:15

Why were you taking care of STI checks when you were with your husband? Did you suspect him of cheating? If you thought you may be in danger of contracting an STI why weren't you using condoms?

You talk about adjusting to not being with your husband but continued to have unprotected sex with him for months following your separation.

If you are going to continue with this pregnancy, DNA test is the only way you're going to know.

Arabelladrinkstea · 19/01/2022 09:06

Logically because you’re new partner withdrew and your husband didn’t then surely your husband is the most likely, that’s where I’d bet on anyway!
However as others say, you won’t know until a dna test.

How are you feeling OP? Do you want the baby?

Russell19 · 19/01/2022 09:02

@blyn

It probably is your husband's baby though you cannot be sure without dna testing. Are you absolutely sure you are pregnant? If not, do a test.

The important issue is whether you actually want a baby.

How is it probably her husbands?
pinkyredrose · 19/01/2022 08:59

Why didn't you use a condom?

Neurodiversitydoctor · 19/01/2022 08:56

Yes of course you need a DNA test and be honest with both men. Or terminate the pregnancy .

AnneLovesGilbert · 18/01/2022 20:20

It sounds like you really wanted to get pregnant so congrats. As others have said, you’ll have to do a DNA test. Good luck with everything.

blyn · 18/01/2022 20:14

Do you want a baby, Drick?

OpinionatedToday · 18/01/2022 19:43

@WorstXmasEver

This has to be a fake thread. That's gross.
I'm not sure what's gross about it. Not using contraception is clearly ill-advised but sleeping with 2 different people on separate occasions is hardly the stuff of Animal Farm
RussiasGreatestLoveMachine · 18/01/2022 19:38

That’s so bizarre. You took care of regular sti checks when married. But gave no thoughts to contraception?

It sounds like the OP’s approach to contraception is an app and the withdrawal method. Probably not entirely suitable for a new partner, even if he did withdraw.

TracyMosby · 18/01/2022 19:13

@Dricka86

Thank you! For all that's worried about my last STI test it was on 1/7/22. So I can clear the air. I am not like this I'm still having hard time trying to adjust not being with my husband. I make sure that's always taking care of even when we were together.
That’s so bizarre. You took care of regular sti checks when married. But gave no thoughts to contraception?
TracyMosby · 18/01/2022 19:12

Again, it is too close to call. You wont know until a dna test is done.

Meanwhile you need to make some decisions on who you want to be with, do they want to be with you, will they if the pregnancy turns out not to be a result of them, can you financially and emotionally manage on you own…

Original poster
Dricka86 · 18/01/2022 19:04

Thank you! For all that's worried about my last STI test it was on 1/7/22. So I can clear the air. I am not like this I'm still having hard time trying to adjust not being with my husband. I make sure that's always taking care of even when we were together.

OP posts:
whatfreshheck · 18/01/2022 18:55

Isn't this the plot of Bridget Jones's baby? Really hope you get everything sorted out OP. I think probably a DNA test is the way forward. The others are right, make sure you have another STI check just in case. Xx

WorstXmasEver · 18/01/2022 18:46

This has to be a fake thread. That's gross.

Original poster
Dricka86 · 18/01/2022 18:44

Rude? Not at all was not rude not one bit. Look please if you are not here to help me with this current situation all the other things not on my mind right now. Please and thank in a advance!

OP posts:
FelicityPike · 18/01/2022 18:43

Oh….and am STI test, no matter what you say.

FelicityPike · 18/01/2022 18:43

100% you will need a DNA test once baby is born (if you continue with this pregnancy, which you probably have to if you’re in America).
As you’re married, your husband has “rights” to this baby even if he’s not the biological father in the States. You will need good legal advice and a divorce ASAP.

lynntheyresexswappers · 18/01/2022 18:42

People have taken the time to help you, so the rudeness is not necessary.
The dates are too close to even fathom a guess. DNA is the only way.

Tillymintpolo · 18/01/2022 18:41

You took the time to get tested but not to get contraception or the morning after pill ?

TurkeyRoastvBubbleandSqueek · 18/01/2022 18:37

The only information I can give you is that I conceived my last son on day 6 of my cycle.

One bit of advice I can give you, is to not be so sentive or rude, when someone is good enough to take the time to reply to your post with some very good advice ie katieg03.

Original poster
Dricka86 · 18/01/2022 18:31

I agree but, I make sure that will never be the case especially knowing what he has going on himself. I did not come here to go back and fourth with anybody.

OP posts:
katieg03 · 18/01/2022 18:27

@Dricka86

First off before me and my friend decided to link up we both got tested. Please go somewhere else with that.
Your husband has also been with someone else as could she have. You continue to have the "go elsewhere" attitude you could run in to complications later down the line.