TTC Thread 14 ... Santa knows what we want for Christmas

but for your mate. Hope she meets someone gorgeous who deserves her soon.

xx

Oh, it's munnzie! I don't need to be so polite then!!

I don't know munnzie, but it does sound a bit fussy to me. Anyway, don't panic; you've got one box to get you started, yes? If not, just buy one box and then ring the helpline tomorrow. If it really is that important, I'm sure they can advise you on how to find a matching box from that lot. I can't believe it is that crucial, though, or they would sell you a starter box with enough sticks in it - so many women must miss this and get it wrong, can it really be that vital?

Oh and Jingleballs, in first month, it is every day for about a couple of weeks. In the subsequent months, it varies. I used to ovulate slightly later and I would usually get a test symbol on day 6 and then on days 8+. Now I have to test every day from day 8, but I stop testing earlier. I think this is a reassuring sign that the machine does respond to differences in cycles.

Wifeof, has your dh considered having his sperm tested? It's so simple, way simpler than fertility testing for women. I know many men are reluctant, but it may put your mind at rest.

Jingleballs, I've never heard that you have to have the same batch number for different boxes of Persona. the only thing I remember reading is that you can't save up unused sticks for use in later cycles, because they say you can't mix batches (but I always cynically presumed this was because they wanted to get you to buy more boxes, but maybe also because they didn't want to encourage you accidentally using sticks past their sell-by date). Did it say that in the instructions? Can't think why it would. Why not ring their helpline?

It IS confusing, and one of the traps we can fall into (and I know I do) is to get over-obsessed with pinpointing ovulation and thinking if we just hit it right on the head - bingo. Fertility doctors say that often women pretty much give up sex during the rest of the month and just focus everything onto hitting the target, kind of like playing darts. Whereas there is a lot to be said for spreading your chances out a bit, having sex every couple of days over a week or so, and so getting better coverage. Certainly, a few of my friends who have been charting have ended up getting pg at the most unlikely times - right at the beginning or end of their fertile period when they thought it was pretty hopeless and they were in two minds about whether or not to even bother. Obviously this has to be kept in balance - it IS worth knowing when you ovulate - but it is more important to keep introducing sperm throughout the fertile period. hence my regular rants about the drawbacks of Persona! I inseminate with donor sperm so it is harder for me to get this kind of coverage, but you lucky ladies with fertile dps really must go for it! Good luck, Wifeof, and have a lovely anniversary

Ooh thanks, MrsF. I'll definitely investigate that. I've read that if you have scanty ewcm you could try raw eggwhite - which doesn't appeal to me AT ALL - and I'm wondering if this will do the same thing; will report any findings back to the group!

Hi Wifeof. I don't really know about Mittelschmertz, though i'll see if my fertility bible tells me anything useful. I had always thought it was the pain of your egg bursting from the ovary, so would be right at ovulation, but a friend has told me that she gets it in advance, which would suggest it is a more generalised thing; maybe the pain of an ovary budding, getting ready to burst?

Anyway, it's a shame your dh is away, but my advice is to go for it tomorrow anyway. It may or may not be too late, but it doesn't sound as though it would be VERY late, and these things aren't cut and dried... Besides which, it is your anniversary! And your Sunday night frolics may not have been too early if you had started your fertile period then. So my verdict, FWIW, is that you haven't optimised your chances this month, but you've still got a very decent chance of getting lucky.

And what was the name and where do you get it, MrsF? sorry, I think you may have posted this info earlier, but I can't find it now.

MrsFogi, do you think that lubricant is positively helpful to sperm, or just less damaging than others? In other words, would those of us with little ewcm benefit from using it?

so sorry that post was so long!

Becki, are you there? I'm a bit worried about you, hun.

morningpaper and marinda - so sorry that your af arrived

cockenzie - thanks so much for your message; it was very kind and really appreciated. put fairly succinctly, I think the chapter and verse on detecting ovulation is:

1. Keep a monthly record of your cycle (you can do this on paper, using special charts, or using the Fertility Friend website). You will have to do this for at least three months before you get reliable information, and it will only work if you are reasonably regular.

2. Record the length of your cycle on this, plus all the symptoms of ovulation you are going to record (see below).

3. The easiest method of detecting when you are ovulating is to use ovulation predictor sticks - like Persona (which you are already using) or other brands. BUT it is usually best to supplement this with other methods, because you should start BDing at the start of your fertile period which is usually earlier than when you get the egg symbol on your Persona.

4. The next sign to look out for is changes in your cervical mucus. You should check it every day, rub it between your fingers (essential!) and note the changes. Most women finds it is pretty dry and crumbly straight after your period, then gets creamier, then - when you get to your fertile period - it goes clear and stretchy (like egg white) or watery - then after you ovulate it goes creamy again. The important thing to know is that you should start BDing as soon as you get this fertile mucus; this will usually be 2-4 days before you ovulate.

5. Some women do temping i.e. take their temperature every morning before getting up, and recording the results on a chart. Your temperature should rise immediately after ovulation, and stay high through the rest of your cycle. This method will not show you that you are about to ovulate, so isn't much use in itself, but it is useful in conjunction with other methods to understand your cycle, and it can reveal potential problems e.g. shortened luteal phase.

6. Some women check their cervix because this too changes around ovulation - goes softer, higher, more open (is that right, ladies?).

7. Other signs to watch out for include abdominal pain, increased interest in sex, um can't think of anymore but they'll come back to me.

8. The point of all this is to decide which signs you will monitor, and then do so religiously every month. That way you develop an understanding of what happens with your individual cycle, and the best times to try to make a baby. Different women choose different combinations of signs, but I think the minimum is to record your dates and either your cervical mucus or your OPK results. The more things you monitor the quicker you get a clear picture of what is going on, but you have to balance that with not getting too obsessive and having no time left for life...

Does that help? Fellow threaders, have I got this right? Any amendments or additions?