Over 40 TTC 2022 group

Hi @Holls81

I was told by my consultant that we don't always release an egg (irrespective of age) I don't recall being told that it tends to be more common as we age though...eggs tend to lessen in quality as we age so that can cause issues with fertilisation (as they are of poorer quality/DNA damage). The issue is there is no test to test the quality of the egg unfortunately but the sperm also plays a big role in the fertilisation process too. I was told that during the days of 1-3 the egg leads and 4-5 the sperm (simplified explanation).

Ok so I’m feeling very pensive these last few days after AF turned up again 🙄.
So as I said I’m booked in for cycle day 21 progesterone test next month. Doc says he’s confident I’m ovulating as my periods are really regular but I’ve read some articles saying that (especially in 40s) you can have normal periods but just not ovulate. Can anyone explain to me, in non complicated terms, about egg release. At our age do we tend to release an egg each month still? Is it just that that egg is likely to be not fertilisable due to various reason brought on by age? Or are eggs not released even though we still have periods? I’m so confused and tend to feel better once I understand what could be happening and why! Thank you x

Thanks @Bluelightbaby - hope this is the case for me, I'm going to book when back from holiday next week. I had some private bloods last month but want my husbands semen tested and ideally an ultrasound as potential PCO.. and tests showed I didn't ovulate this month.

Hi I’m 42 ttc third baby love to all

@autumnleaves17 @jalu47 im 42 have two teenagers from a previous relationship. My partner and I have been trying for 7months now and GP said as I’m over 40 and we’re post 6months if TTC we could have free tests. I’ve had 2 blood tests, ultrasound- all NAD ! And partner is booked in for a seamen analysis next week.

we wouldn’t be entitled to any IVF due to me already having children x

@Holls81 it depends where you are (postcode lottery) as mine said they won't offer anything at all (I'm 41 a week today and weve been trying since last October), only day 21 bloods, because I already have a son. I'm tempted to argue in behalf of my partner as he has no children, so don't see why he should be penalised because he's with me? 😕

@jalu47 no worries at all. X

Thanks @Holls81 I'm going to make an appt!

@jalu47 hiya. I went to see the gp this morning and explained that we’d been trying for 9 months. He’s booked me in for thyroid function and progesterone blood tests on 5th oct.
They will defo look in to it after 6 months if you’re over 40. I have 2 DC already x

@HWT I don't drink for other reasons but I think you need to still enjoy your life, and if for you that sometimes includes a drink I think life's too short to totally abstain x

Sorry to hear you are feeling so down @autumnleaves17.

Let us know how you get on with the GP? I'm 40 and have one already so also trying for no.2 for 8 months. I looked at my local guidelines and it says I wouldn't qualify for anything if you have a living child so I haven't even bothered going. Wondering if I should try anyway? I paid for some private bloods but would like my husbands sperm tested and an ultrasound would be great too. My bloods showed potential PCO and my progesterone was super low this cycle which they said means I didn't even ovulate. I might book an appt and push for a few tests at least!

@autumnleaves17 I’m so sorry for you. I think we’ve all been there. So many times I think I’m ok with this I can cope with this and then AF and I’m a complete emotional wreck. Every month I tell myself don’t get my hopes up and I think I’m all zen and then AF and I realise I am not zen at all. It’s completely understandable and normal to be upset. Every month it’s like a little loss/grieving moment in some ways.

If you are over 35 and have been trying for 6 months I think GP does fertility testing straight away. That was my experience at 37. Everything was normal range for me, maybe on low side perhaps for hubby (he’s a year younger than me) but still normal range. We got pregnant a month after testing told us we were ok, after 16 months of trying. Probably coincidence but it was a relief to get ok testing results so maybe that helped. I hope same for you @autumnleaves17, that you get your tests and then get your positive result xxx this is so hard but hang in there you are a warrior

AF arrived 😢
So that is 25 day cycle.

I'm going to my GP on Monday to ask for a health check and a pelvic ultrasound.

Only thing is we haven't been trying for more than 12 months... it's been more like 6 months....

I turned 44 last month.

Anyone else been in the same situation as I am now.

Say here upset and feeling generally down 😢

@Dragon82 thank you 😊
Trying to stay positive and thinking that I'm very lucky to have a DD1 already too...

@jalu47 I had high prolactin during fertility screening and the GP said did you dash to the appointment and feel stressed. I was like yes, so she ordered repeat test and I was under strict instructions to take my time getting to test centre and it was normal. I know progesterone is different but all these hormones rise and fall monthly so maybe call doctors to discuss.

@HWT I think doing whatever helps you live your life while in this limbo is the main thing. It’s really hard, but sometimes I just think getting pregnant can take time. It took me 16 months to get pregnant with my son. Nothing. Really had any affect except just to keep trying every month and not totally lose it while the months went by. Sending wishes for your positive soon x

@Dragon82 thank you - you're right - this isn't easy but the odd one here and there much better in moderation.

I kind of know abstaining is the way to go for a bit and if someone told me I'd be guaranteed a baby at the end it would be easy but this could be my life for some time!

@jalu47 please don't feel down about this. Every month your cycle can vary a day or two and the progesterone test is really sensitive. I had one that did this 18 months ago and had a total melt down and thought I was infertile and it was just the wrong day. It's since been proven that I ovulate every month. If you're getting the LH surge on the wee sticks then I'm sure it's fine. And as someone else pointed out they can prescribe progesterone if you are actually low.

If I've learnt anything though in the last 18 months is that you have to push if you want more tests etc.

@Dragon82 I'm not sure at the moment as is only a one off test but I might seek some more advice. I've been on steroids for 6 weeks due to my IBD and I think maybe that has interfered although they told me it wouldn't.

@autumnleaves17 My friend had her first at 40, and her second at 45 years old. Both beautiful boys. It does happen. Stay strong. @jalu47 can you get progesterone treatment if it is low? I’ve no idea but I’ve heard of progesterone pessaries but not sure if that’s only for when you are pregnant already.
@HWT I was a big drinker in my 20s and 30s but did ‘one year no beer’ and I don’t drink now. And it’s fine. Although the idea of not drinking for me previously would have been unthinkable (first girl out, last girl standing, or not, at the bar). But the thing is, you’ve got a lot going on right now and stacking more on top might be a lot. Be kind to yourself. If you need that glass of wine in evenings I doubt it will interfere with anything. Obviously if it’s a bottle you might try cut back, easier said than done. But this is a big mountain we are climbing so whatever gives comfort is ok, at least that’s what I think.

@HWT I haven't given it up but don't drink that much, a glass of wine or two at the weekend / every other weekend.

I am considering ditching it altogether but I think my main interfering factor is stress - I'm in the middle of the longest house move EVER and it's killing me. Offer accepted last October - was meant to be 8 weeks but 9 months later still dossing with my parents and feeling very in limbo!

@HWT I think give it up completely!
You can still make great non alcoholic drinks!

Has anyone had their progesterone checked?

I had day 2 bloods done early on in this cycle and my hormones and ovarian reserve look good but my progesterone done on day 21 was super low (1.8 🥺) and have been told I won't have ovulated. Feeling really despondent.

I conceived and had an early miscarriage in June so maybe have just had an off month.

Anyone else had their progesterone done?

@Dragon82 it certainly is a roller coaster!
I'm a bit older than you, turned 44 last month...
TTC number 2 for past 5 months.
Have a DD who is 4. So had my first at 40!

Feel like we started TTC number 2 a bit late 😖
Feel like I'm out for this cycle, Unless I'm dramatically surprised!! Haha! But tiredness and some cramps usual AF symptoms.

Good luck to all.
I'm not sure if we will conceive, I don't know anyone who has got pregnant at my age sadly.

@HWT I wasn't a big drinker anyway, but I cut back to just the odd glass here or there in the first two weeks of my cycle, and then wouldn't drink anything from ovulation onwards. No idea if it made any difference but I felt like I had to give trying to conceive my best shot given my age (40). Ironically, the month I conceived I actually had quite a few drinks post ovulation (at a weekend away with friends, nothing crazy but a few beers over the weekend) - I was pretty much thinking I may as well have a few drinks as I'd pretty much given up on conception ever happening naturally (was waiting for hospital referral). A few days later - positive pregnancy test!

Hi everyone,
Can I canvas general opinions on drinking? I am contemplating giving up for a bit as feels like the last tool in the tool box.
What's everyone's general approach to it? Carry on as normal? Abstain? Cut back? Would be interesting to see how people approach this!