IVFers thread

Glad AF has arrived PK! Its weird actually wanting AF to come isnt it? Typically late when you need it to come to move on..... Hope injections not too bad. Remember someone else's advice to ice?

Thanks for all your posts about our treatment options. (Esp Soosy reminding me about mature eggs and FSH etc) Have spoken to Serhal and will go for GIFT. Also managed to convince them to start down regging on sunday. So off to the clinic tomorrow to pick up the drugs - might see you there PK!
Feeling much better about it now I have a plan and am not hanging around for another month waiting to start (Im not good at waiting). So EC mid feb by my calcs.

We moved into our house nearly 2 years ago and still my DH hasnt got a clue where things live in the kitchen...... his idea of cooking supper is ordering a curry.

I agree that men are from a different planet, esp where treatment is concerned. Also PSML at the 'dont want to be fussed over'!! Dh says he doesnt feel so involved in the treatment because he really doesnt have to do v much even though all of my time is spent living with side effects, trying to be hopeful, taking drugs, going to appointments, sorting out childcare for EC/ET, paying the bills and thinking about it. I get cross when I feel that Im doing it all alone (and he is always at work during the hard bits). But then we really need the money.....

Oh pk the wonders of men! When all you want is a cup of tea and a good sob, with no more comment than 'yes darling I understand' and what do you get, you didn't want to be fussed over! pmsl

Still waiting for mine to cook me supper one night (We have been together for 14 + years and married for 10), so you can imagine how hungry I am supportive mine can be.

I do think that they don't know what to do at times like this because they don't have much facility for empathy, its a girl thing - which is why mn exsists. Glad to hear things are sort of better.

Hi everyone,

Stiki, I should imagine that gift has a higher success rate as they can put back several mature eggs, whereas with iui the eggs cannot be seen before fertilisation. But like pk I would ask 'if I was your wife' question. It may not be a chromosomal thing, as we don't have that problem, infact apart from a male problem, they cannot see any reason why its not happening, since using donor sperm. 35 is considered quite young in treatment terms... Good Luck

Sorry to hear that you are feeling down pk - I always find that I swing from feeling fabulous to completely depressed when I do a cycle, and from what I understand it is completely normal. If you get to go for acupuncture tell them you are feeling down. I went for acupuncture after my Mum died and the first session was completely cathartic, I did have the cycle of ivf. iyswim.

Trying not to eat chocolate and finding it v hard, started raiding DS's christmas stash last night.... which is very mean... I will replace it.

Sticki - can totally see why you are leaning toward a more natural less drug based treatment. I agree with MNPF in that you need to think carefully about the differing chances of success with the different options you have.

Not sure how applicable this is to you, but what is your hormone profile like? Has anyone said anything about ovarian reserve at all? Just wondering whether if you feel time is running out, maybe go for the treatment with the best chance of success immediately? If you have lots of time left, may be you could be more relaxed about it.

Sorry if this wasn't helpful to you and good luck in whatever you decide to do.

You guys are the only people I can ask for opinions on treatment options. I hope you dont mind me venting about something thats on my mind (long!)......

We are lined up for a GIFT IVF cycle to start down regging after my next period later this month. There is some empirical evidence that GIFT has a success rate of 40% after repeated failures vs 0% blastocyst IVF. This is because somehow doing a more natural treatment works better as the fallopian tubes do some kind of magic apparently and nurtures poor quality embryos that wouldnt survive in the lab. (GIFT is when they put the eggs and sperm back into the fallopian tubes by Lap directly after ET rather than culture embryos in lab.) Our problem is likely to be a chromosome issue with my eggs which means that only about 10% are potentially viable.

During our consultation Paul Serhal talked about IUI being also good in these scenarios because of the same 'more natural' reason. We were very negative about IUI because we have had 4 already with no success (and 5-6 good follicles each time) and he thinks you have to believe your treatment could work.

Anyway, whats going round my head is - was I wrong to dismiss IUI (although there isnt the empirical evidence)? IUI is much less invasive, doesnt need down regging and also needs less drugs.

I guess Im just dreading all the drugs, appointments etc and IUI would be a way of reducing it a bit. Another thought is that perhaps they would let me start down regging for the GIFT this month. That might help me to get on with it rather than feeling its hanging over me.

Thanks! This post (rant!) has helped me to understand my issue (ie chicken about the next cycle)...
PK - Thanks v much for starting this thread.

PK - I find I cant find a balance of having hope that it might work and the alternative of not hoping too much in case it doesnt..... Its so natural to protect yourself, especially as treatment (and IF) is soo difficult emotionally.

From talking to my acupuncturist and Paul Serhal at UCH its really important to believe it will (or at least might) work. The only time I have managed to have complete positive thinking (apart from perhaps 1st cycle) was when I saw a hypnotherapist woman who was amazing and allowed me to stop the negativity for about 10 days of the 2WW. Thinking of going to see her again as even more negative now. I feel that in the scheme of a cycle another £60 to have hope is worth it. (Not sure where you are but hypno woman is in SW London if you want more info.)

Is there anyway you can find some time to do something fun with your DH? Cinema/meal out/walk in the park etc..... Treatment is really hard, and very hard on a relationship. Can you go and see a trashy movie for a couple of hours out?

MNPK - 1 previous cycle resulting in DS (2.6), clinic UCH, currently doing FET,transfer expected mid Jan.

Coggy - 3 X clomid resulting in DS who was tragically stillborn, 4 IUIs, now 1st IVF - just has the letter W/B: 4th Feb for egg transfer (Haven't started any drugs yet - can that be right???!!!)

Onlyaphase - 1 previous cycle two years ago resulting in DD (14 months) currently downregging to start another IVF cycle. No dates yet but expect to have egg collection around end Jan. Clinic not that hopeful this time due to my age (38) and poorish response last time.

soosy (38) - 9 icsi cycles, 2 fet's, first resulting in pg mmc at 10 weeks, 3 iui's with donor sperm, 4ivf cycles with donor sperm , first resulting in darling life saver ds (2.11) currently waiting to start 5th ivf cycle, which should start end next week, beginning week after. All at the Chelsea & Westminster.

Sticki (35) UCH. 3 IUI cycles and 2 IVF failures before getting pg naturally whilst waiting for IVF with PGS. Wonderful DD 2.5 (yes a lifesaver). Since another 2 years of trying, IUI and IVF with PGS. Next month starting GIFT or IUI. Likely I have a chromosomal problem with my eggs (ruled out all other things).

MNPK, it is incredibly difficult to stay positive all the time. Sometimes I feel like your DH - we are all lucky to be living in a time when medicine allows treatment of our problems like this. But other times I just feel so resentful and cross and "why me" about the whole thing - like this week when most of my NCT group seem to be announcing or planning their second pregnancies, it can be so frustrating and agonising to hear them talk about this so casually.

TBH it probably is the drugs having this effect on you at the moment. I too feel incredibly down and tired all the time - combination of drugs, January blues, no sunshine, no money etc isn't the best thing in the world.

Also, is the negativity your way of protecting yourself if this cycle doesn't work out for you? You know, if you don't get excited about it and don't think it will work, then it won't matter so much if it doesn't work out?

MNPK - 1 previous cycle resulting in DS (2.6), clinic UCH, currently doing FET,transfer expected mid Jan.

Coggy - 3 X clomid resulting in DS who was tragically stillborn, 4 IUIs, now 1st IVF - just has the letter W/B: 4th Feb for egg transfer (Haven't started any drugs yet - can that be right???!!!)

Onlyaphase - 1 previous cycle two years ago resulting in DD (14 months) currently downregging to start another IVF cycle. No dates yet but expect to have egg collection around end Jan. Clinic not that hopeful this time due to my age (38) and poorish response last time.

soosy (38) - 9 icsi cycles, 2 fet's, first resulting in pg mmc at 10 weeks, 3 iui's with donor sperm, 4ivf cycles with donor sperm , first resulting in darling life saver ds (2.11) currently waiting to start 5th ivf cycle, which should start end next week, beginning week after. All at the Chelsea & Westminster.

Sorry its all a bit long and complicated, and yes I think I have had everything, but as you can tell we really wanted a family.

I know what you mean about childcare during treatment, like you onlyaphase, my mother isn't around and I would rather my mil didn't. DH usually takes time off, we live v close to the hospital and I have always walked home after sedation, Dh & Ds come to pick me up. The hospital do think I am nuts btw. The hospital have been v good during scans and sometimes the nurses play with DS or he has come in to the room with me, he is quite aware about what is going on this time and when I went to pick up my prescription, he asked if i was going to have an ultrasound and if he was coming too.

About it being easier to have sex to have children, it would be, but do you know I have got quite used to it now, takes about 10 years!

MNPK - 1 previous cycle resulting in ds (2.6), Clinic: UCH, currently doing FET, transfer expected mid jan.

Coggy - 3 X clomid resulting in DS who was tragically stillborn, 4 IUIs, now 1st IVF - just has the letter W/B: 4th Feb for egg transfer (Haven't started any drugs yet - can that be right???!!!)

Onlyaphase - 1 previous cycle two years ago resulting in DD (14 months) currently downregging to start another IVF cycle. No dates yet but expect to have egg collection around end Jan. Clinic not that hopeful this time due to my age (38) and poorish response last time.

Coggy - that sounds about right to me as you should be on the stimulating drugs for around 10-12 days only before egg collection. Downregging before that can last up to 4 weeks but often not, it depends on the clinic and their timetable. I also wanted to say how sorry I was to read your short history, and to see the loss of your DS. How very sad.

MNPK - did you say you were on a medicated FET? In my ignorance I would have thought that they would just monitor you and transfer the embryos at the appropriate time - what sort of drugs are they using?

MNPK - 1 previous cycle resulting in ds (2.6), Clinic: UCH, currently doing FET, transfer expected mid jan.

Coggy - 3 X clomid resulting in DS who was tragically stillborn, 4 IUIs, now 1st IVF - just has the letter W/B: 4th Feb for egg transfer (Haven't started any drugs yet - can that be right???!!!)

LOL at you worrying about being rude Soosy!
The whole thing is enough to make you want to drop off isn't it???!!

I looked into the foresight info but have to confess to agreeing with you and sticki - it looked VERY full on and scary...and that was only reading about it!! I'm very impressed that you both managed to do it.

Cedar...I'm on CD13 and waiting another week or so before starting to take progesterone so that the clinic can time when I do my IVF. Probably scheduled for egg collection near to the end of Feb. I'm waiting foir a schedule to come through the post.....but nothing yet. Hopefully in the next couple of days otherwise I'll phone them.

Would it be a good idea to have a profile-type thing of each other eg. how many IVF tries, age, number of DC etc. or is that just really nosey of me??!!

hi i forgot to say we go with Barts in London.

MNPKF - its a tricky one isn't it, care of DCs during IVF. I have no childcare or relatives nearby (sadly my mother died several years ago and I would much rather not involve MiL).

Luckily DH's work has a really good policy for IVF so he can take time off for scans etc. In reality he will probably work at home for those days (maybe 6 of them?) and I will take myself off to the clinic while he babysits. Embryo collection is the time that is worrying me as we both need to be there for our various "duties", and we really can't take DD with us for the whole morning, and I won't be able to drive after the sedation. I have asked a very good friend to help out, but it is an enormous favour to ask - 90 min drive the night before plus 4 hours babysitting then drive back. Do you have a similar friend you could ask? Or else maybe a babysitter, or an extra session at nursery?

For embryo transfer, will probably have DH and DD in the car waiting for me. Not ideal, but neither is the whole bloody IVF process.

Hi- I had IVF to concieve my ds (2.9). I followed most of Zita West's advice in a book called fertility and cnception. i didn't have acupunture but did have hypnotherpy which i think really helped with all aspects of the treatment including egg collection and transfer.
i think you have to really make time for yourself and your body and as someone else said earlier drink lots and lots of water because ZWest says that your body cannot funtion 100% if it is dehydrated in anyway.
Good luck everyone. still deciding whether to do ivf again.. it's hard work x x

Oh how lovely, an IVF thread just when I need it.

I too feel I don't really belong on the TTC threads as frankly I've been TTC for 6 years now with NO success other than an IVF cycle 2 years ago resulting in our 14 month DD.

Am on day 7 of my second ever IVF cycle, downregging using the pill. Ironic just isn't the word, seeing my IVF clinic handing me a blister pack of contraceptive pills. I used buserelin to downreg last time but became a tad ....tetchy....shall we say on this, so didn't want to go for that again. Am waiting for my schedule of drugs and scans to turn up tomorrow so I know where I am for dates etc.

Reading about the needles etc has brought the nastiness of the injections back to me all over again. Deep joy at the thought of fiddling around with little vials and needles again.

Good luck to us all